I've name changed...
I'm depressed and apparently also suffer with anxiety ...YAY!
I'm meant to be having an online assessment tonight at 10.
But my two children are wide awake.
DH has gone to football. I spent the day at work I am tired. He left from about 6... he knew about this appointment and says he cares blah blah.
Normally he does bedtime and they would be in bed by 8pm the latest. I'm no good a bed times. One is still on my breast and just refuses to fall asleep without it... the other is generally good but not tonight. Both normally get locked in the room with DH after bath time or I leave the house.
He knows I'm no good at bedtimes hence the reason he does them... well its all he does because dinner is done and literally has to walk in have dinner the bath & bedtime routine... which I taught him..And when I say I leave I mean I go sit in the car most nights.
I'm a SAHM but work at the weekends. I was looking forward to tonight I made the first step and self referred. I haven't had my dinner yet because I was hoping they would be asleep and I could have a meal in peace and gather my thoughts ... I feel so low.
I don't even know why I am writing this... I suppose just to have somebody to talk to. I have no friends in this country and where I'm from there is a massive time difference so it's futile reaching out on WhatsApp.
I want to curl up and die... but it's not fair on my children is it.