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Housing vs lifestyle

6 replies

notanothernam · 09/02/2019 15:58

I guess this is a personal question and no right or wrong answer, but just curious about other people's opinions. When restrained by finances, do you prioritise your housing or your lifestyle, obviously most of us try to strike a compromise, but do you worry about one more than the other? We had children quite young (unintentionally but without regret!), meaning we bought our first home while still paying childcare and didn't have much of a deposit, we have a small but functional 3 bed semi, house prices aren't too bad, midlands so achievable but not cheap (new build so the boxiest of box rooms, one reception but a million toilets thankfully ha) but in a great location especially for the children. Location was what swung us actually, good school, safe area, little to no commute so lifestyle comes into it that way too, as we could afford more in an unknown area with commute. It's fine, as I say it's functional, but ideally we need something bigger for proper dining space, home work space, play space and storage. We might be able to upsize in a couple years but would mean a mortgage nearly double what we pay now potentially, but we love our holidays and leisure time. We love to plan, look forward to them throughout the year and there's so many places we want to see (perhaps another by product of having kids young?). Holidays are one example but also it's generally not sweating to pay the mortgage, not worrying about days out etc. This feels sensible, but then I feel guilty we haven't provided the spacious family home I would love to have for them, should this take priority over holidays, activities, christmases etc? We could stretch ourselves to achieve sooner. We will afford that house one day, but I worry it'll be half way through their high school years.

Anyways I'm not really looking for an analysis of my situation, but know people tend to like a bit of context when being asked a question! How is it for you? Have you had to compromise? Is the house the most important thing? (Ps I'm aware we are not in a bad situation and lucky for what we have, I'm only worrying whether we have our priorities straight).

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 09/02/2019 16:04

There is no right or wrong answer to this. Some. Will prefer to spend their money on a family home they love, as they spend the most time there, and ultimately.long term the higher the value of the house, thr higher the absolute value increase is long term.

Others prefer the holidays and social events and will spend time in a home they don't really love

Personally I think it's a balance,

Bluntness100 · 09/02/2019 16:06

Sorry and when I was restrained by finances I prioritised home.

silkpyjamasallday · 09/02/2019 16:08

As someone who rents, I would prioritise having a stable and easily affordable home, which for you means staying put in a smaller home and enjoying your spare money on holidays. I wouldn't want to give up luxuries and be in a more precarious housing situation, an affordable mortgage is the Holy Grail in my opinion! I think high school is a better time to upsize anyway as teenagers will appreciate the extra space more than young children.

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WellBHouse · 09/02/2019 16:11

Following with interest as we are deciding between a bigger home versus having money to actually go in holiday and save.

notanothernam · 09/02/2019 16:13

Thanks bluntness what I meant to add to my post as well is that I find myself torn as to the priorities in terms of their childhood, I'm not too concerned long term as I'm confident our earning potential is good long term, but more so in the here and now. I can't believe in just 10 years time my eldest could be leaving home, I look back 10 years and it feels like yesterday! Should we prioritise the making of memories or their family home, I have such fond memories of my family home but then I love that I'm giving our children experiences we never got. As you say there's a balance, which I suppose we have to a degree at the moment but I really feel we'll need a bigger house so they have space as teenagers, but then I'm so excited about all the places I want to take them as they get older!

I mean the real answer is to just get more money isn't it really 😂

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 09/02/2019 16:13

I agree if you can't afford to move and would struggle to pay the mortgage, I think most people would tell you to stay put.

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