Oh my GOD! I’m so embarrassed and will never forget this!!

[Brownbootscoldheart]

Just bumped into DH’s uncle and aunt in our local supermarket. We don’t see them very often, they are very nice, the uncle is a little odd and very stuffy though.
I made a fuss of aunt, how lovely to see you etc etc and turned to uncle and said ‘ah look at you with a glittery jumper on’ WHY WHY WHY did my mouth say this????

It wasn’t a glittery jumper - he has the most awful dandruff and his blue jumper was literally covered on the shoulders.

Aunt just brushed it over, uncle looked bemused and I could have just died on the spot.

And yes, we kept bumping into them aisle after aisle after that.

I may just have to emigrate or something 🙈🙈

[Otterseatpuffinsdontthey]

The op's post was funny - but I laughed out loud @Tara336
My own one, though not me who said it.
Many years ago.
Group of student nurses, sitting hospital cafeteria. Some suffering from hangovers from previous evening.
My friend states that her eyes feel like "broken glass".
Tumbleweed. Death stare(s).
Unknown to my friend, one of the people present had a glass eye.
I still cringe

[misskiki69]

Oops a daisy.

[Springwalk]

[MarthasGinYard]

Oh Op

Just shrivelled inside a little bit for you

You have my sympathy....just the kind of thing I'd manage to say

[WhentheRabbitsWentWild]

@Stormy



One of my embarrassing moments was not too bad, considering I was 10. On the way to Minehead for a school journey, circa 1975 . Asked a teacher if he would like some crisps and he held up a cup cake . I said "No, its ok Sir, I don't want that" . He was simply holding it up to show me that he had something to eat .

[Juells]

I gushed to someone I hardly knew "How lovely, you're pregnant!". She said "No, we've been trying for eight years". :( :( :( I wouldn't mind if I hadn't done the same thing to someone years before, who had a baby the same time as I did. I met her a few months later and she was in a pregnancy top and said "You're very brave to get pregnant again so quickly, it will be a few years before I pluck up the courage". I don't feel so bad about that one though - if you don't want people to think you're pregnant, don't wear pregnancy clothes.

[ReanimatedSGB]

snort Oh dear oh dear.
Just to make you feel a bit better: many years ago (about three years before I had DS) I was in a pub, waiting for some pals, having a fag to go with my pint, and some bloke came over and said, reasonably politely, 'Do you think you should be smoking?'
Me: (already fairly sure I know what's coming) Why shouldn't I? Is there a no-smoking sign?
Bloke: Well, in your... condition.
Me: (relishing the opportunity for a Teaching Moment) What do you mean?
Bloke: well, er, the baby, er...
Me: But I'm not pregnant. I'm just fat.

He was so mortified he bought me another pint. And, hopefully, never ever made unsolicited comments on a woman's appearance again...

[SchadenfreudePersonified]

A very sad foot-in-mouth . . .

. . .when I was inhospitable waiting to have my DD, I waist a ward with a lovely girl who was also expecting her 2nd baby.

Like me, she hadn't wanted to be told the sex, but revealed that she had her fingers crossed for a boy, as she already had a girl.

I was taken down, and gave birth and was released from hospital before her, and never gave her a thought until a month or so later I ran into her in our local butcher's (she didn't live anywhere near me, btw).

We said hello, lovely to see you etc, and I said = "We;;? Did you get your boy". She replied "Yes, I did, but he died."

It was awful!

I'd never run into her before, and never have since.

[SchadenfreudePersonified]

*Well?, not We;;?

[ATailofTwoKitties]

I turned up for a smear test last week and the nurse commented that I was a bit early.

Somehow my mouth said ‘That’s me, always the eager beaver’ without pausing to consult my brain.

[Elderflower14]

Will share my embarassing story.
A few years ago I was watching Crimewatch Roadshow.
Presenters were going on about home security. Got up when it had finished and went to go out of the front door. Saw a man through the frosted glass walk across the front lawn and head for the side gate. I flung the front door open and yelled very loudly.... "WHERE THE BLOODY HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE GOING????"
Man calmly turns round and said "Morning Mrs Elderflower, I've come to read your electric meter!!" (which is on the side of the house!!)
I of course saw him several times that day in the village and he kept staring beadily at me!!! 🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

[Bigonesmallone3]

@Elderflower14
What a lovely surname

[Elderflower14]

It's not my real surname!! 🤣 Just my mn name!!

[Bigonesmallone3]

Oh I did wonder 😂

[Shouldbecleaning92]

Majorly outing but upon meeting my Dhs distant uncle I went to shake his hand, he went in for a kiss on the cheek and I promptly head butted him.

I have never felt such shame.

[Impatienceismyvirtue]

@ATailofTwoKitties that just made my night 😂

[FogCutter]

Eager beaver 😂😂😂😂

[Impatienceismyvirtue]

On holiday this summer I was at the supermarket and in a rush to get back to the apartment, quickly threw my groceries in a bag and put my PIN into the card machine; it was taking forever (I think because it was a foreign card) and when the “authorising” message came up I thought that was it saying “remove your card” so I whipped it out and the transaction failed. I apologised to the cashier and went “I JUST PULLED OUT TOO SOON”. The cashier on my till and the next one, plus customer behind all paused and looked at me before bursting out laughing. The cashier just said “Oh I hate it when that happens” and obviously then I had to stand there for the next 5824710 minutes while my card connected up again and the payment was finally processed

[Seeleyboo]

Very drunk one night with my best friend of many many years and she has a black and white photo on her wall. It resembled one of the 80s type black and white pics with the black plastic frame and they normally had a half naked man and baby posing in them. Anyway this one had a woman. Like I said we were both very drunk and I said. After all these years I keep meaning to ask why you have such and ugly picture of a woman on your wall. She replied. That's my dead mother.

[SomeOtherDay]

Excellent thread! ‘FIL’ in the Saturday Night Fever suit is hilarious 😂

[Newsername]

😂😂🤣🤣
That’s genuinely made me laugh!! Poor man!

[Patroclus]

My friend once creeped up behind his girlfriend and did the jolty shoulders suprise thing. It turned out to be an angry Bosnian woman who had the same haircut.

[Patroclus]

Sorry I didnt realise this was semi-zombie. Ah well Im enjoying it.

[purplelass]

My best one was when a one armed shop assistant was struggling to get a bag off a shelf and I blurted out "do you need a hand?"

cringe

[Mummytumm]

This made me lol OP but only because it's exactly the sort of thing that happens to me. Yes you will think about it forever, but one day you will laugh about it to.

Want to hear mine? Was having new lino put down, had pet rats in big bird cage. Lino-layer man said "Ooooo rats!" & went up to the cage to try to touch them. I said "Don't go too near the cage, they'll have your fingers off!"
He said "What - do you mean like this?" and held up his hand - he had no fingers on one hand, just stumps. He'd sliced through them years before with a carpet-cutting knife.

That happened about 20 years ago, I can laugh about it now!