Do you live in a naice bit of London and have a 4/5 yr old?

[Orangedaisy]

If so, is it socially acceptable for your child to go to a church hall style birthday party (with entertainer) wearing a polyester fancy dress/princess/superhero outfit, should they choose to do so?

DM claims it’s not on, and I should make sure my DD wears something nice from John Lewis or joules...... I think DD should wear whatever the hell she wants.

Is it a fancy dress party?

No it’s not.

Not in a naice bit of London. But my DC go to parties wearing costumes in liu of smart clothes.
Its what feels special to them.

Tell your DM to butt out.

@BreevandercampLGJ I did!! But it’s irritated me nonetheless.

I live in a super naice bit of london and this is absolutely fine

Didn't Harper Beckham go to Buckingham palace in a princess costume?

Let your child wear what they want.

Of course it's ok!

Probably a drip feed (sorry) but DM is taking DD to said party. DM would be going anyway (it’s a family thing, I’m not going so I can look after younger DD who would terrorise the party). I still stand my ground and will let DD wear what she likes. I think DM doesn’t want her granddaughter to embarrass her. Not realising it’s totally normal to wear dress up stuff to parties even in naice areas.

I mean what do you mean by naice?

I live in West London where there are lots of professional families but we don't have an organic deli locally - does that qualify or do you need my postcode for fine discrimination?

Fwiw I'd say around here it's fine. True middle class naiceness means doing whatever the fuck you like in the confident knowledge that no one will question it. It strikes me as a bit insecure and aspirational to obsess about Baby Boden etc for parties.

Some of these responses

Absolutely fine OP

Worked as a nanny for 17y for families in various 'naice' parts of London. It's definitely okay!

Fwiw I'd say around here it's fine. True middle class naiceness means doing whatever the fuck you like in the confident knowledge that no one will question it.

100% this
It’s how I operate

Oh dear God, do we share a mother ?? not quite sure what she would of made of a family friend Jake who lived in a spider man costume for years, he used to change into it as soon as he came home from school.

The exact postcode doesn’t matter-just DM’s perception of it is enough! But loads of organic delis.

I agree, caring what you wear and going in head to toe brand new co-ordinating aspirational labels is massively insecure. Which is the last thing I want my girls to pick up.

I am not really the target audience as I live in naice Surrey, but we do have a lot of DFL's so I may just squeak it.

I have a mother like this.

It’s common
What will people think
People will think you can’t afford naice clothes.

Etc.

I don’t give a shit. It’s a party. Fun. She has the rest of her life to were joules or john lewis and “dress nicely”. Not many opportunities in life to go dresses in a flouncy princess dress or superhero outfit.

I am a big believer in letting kids choose their own clothes. I am very proud that my kids are confident in what they like to wear, and aren’t concerned about judgement or others. I, on the other hand, always had my outfits chosen for me, and when I started to choose my own clothes was always met with critical comments. That’s too nice for x, are you sure you want to wear that top, that isn’t dressy enough for a party...
As a result i barely stray now from black jeans, vest top and doc martins. My mother still critises and says i should wear “a nice heel” or something a bit more joules..

Point your mother to the multitude of threads on here which grump about the 'secure' middle and upper-middles' tangle-haired offspring, clad in a Spiderman tshirt,a tutu and pyjama bottoms.

Wonder if we are in the same bit @orangedaisy

I’ve seen children in fairy costumes mix with children in “normal” party clothes at the recent outbreak of 4 year olds birthday parties I’ve attended.

Pay no heed to DM

I buy my kids' clothes from Tesco because they get outgrown (and trashed from muddy parks) before they get worn out anyway. What's the point of wasting Boden on a 4yo?

Round here no-one would notice, still less care.

I bought a wax coat at the Great Yorkshire Show in 1900 and frozen to death, I was just thinking about retiring it (and buying another) when my mother told me that people would think DH and I were poor.

So I wore it for another five years, I only got rid of it because I lost five stone on the cancer diet, otherwise I would still be wearing it.

Thanks all, I knew I was right . Nice to have it confirmed. DM knows I was unimpressed by her (and that DD will go as she pleases) but as DM is doing me a favour so won’t make a deal out of it or mention again. So it’s been cathartic discussing here.

It's definitely fine! If a little one can't dress up in what ever they fancy to go to a Birthday party then there's something wrong!!