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How quickly can you fall in love?

3 replies

MyGastIsFlabbered · 07/02/2019 23:50

I'm a middle aged divorced mum of 2. Since separating from my ex nearly 4 years ago I've dated a few guys I've recently met someone and he makes me feel like a lovesick teenager....honestly it's nauseating and embarrassing.

So how quickly can you distinguish love from lust?

OP posts:
oldmum22 · 08/02/2019 07:56

Could you imagine growing old together?
Could you imagine nursing him through a bad illness?
Would you still love him if he snored, was balding and overweight?

If you answer yes , then its love .
BUT
Does he feel the same way ?

Confusedfornow · 08/02/2019 09:04

I think most people confuse love with lust.

They fall in lust, not love.

By the time the lust has been used up, they are usually living together, maybe she's pregnant, things happen which are difficult to extricate themselves from, so they just carry on regardless. They call this situation "love".

That's not to say something akin to love doesn't exist, I think it does. It's that strange attraction you might feel for somebody, not exactly sexual, at least not overtly. More the subtle joy of proximity. The rush of excitement you feel when they are in your company. The needless touches, the glances, the ease of being together. Where you suddenly realise they are beautiful without being aware of when this happened.

Lust is primal, it's instant, there are some people who you look at and just want to fuck.

Love I think is not rational, lust can get you into trouble, love can make you lose your mind!

MyGastIsFlabbered · 08/02/2019 21:39

When we're together we can't stop touching each other. Even if it's just holding hands. And it sounds so schmaltzy that I'm embarrassed to type it, but wherever we touch feels electric. We haven't even had sex yet. He does feel the same way.

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