Personality mismatches with dc

[Introvertedmum]

I’m an introvert and dd is very much an extrovert and she wears me out! I assumed that when I made my own tribe of little people they’d be more like me than not.

She’s wonderful and there are times that I look at her and think “wow!” at the things that come so naturally to her that I struggle with. But sometimes the relief when I drop her to school or she drops off to sleep makes me feel so guilty.

I could have written this!

My DH and DD4 are extroverts, and I'm definitely on the introvert side of the spectrum. I find the most challenging part of parenting is putting her need for company (through meeting up with her friends and activities where I need to be preset) above my need for quiet time.

But I know it's temporary, she'll be old enough to socialise without me before long, and it forces me to be more sociable which is good for me to a certain extent.

I still cherish the evenings the kids are in bed though - I don't know any parents who don't!

I was just thinking about this the other day! She does seem to be more extroverted, but she's only 4 so I don't know how accurate that is. She does not stop talking, and she always wants to be physically attached to me - much more so than the other 4 year olds I know.

I am the most introverted introvert you could ever imagine. DH is slightly more outgoing but not much. DS is completely different to both of us - so extroverted it's untrue, voice like a foghorn, temper like a volcano, never stops talking, ever. People have been comparing him to Brian Blessed since he was about 4. He used to tow me up to great gaggles of new friends he'd made in the park and expect me to entertain them. I don't know where he gets it from and it can be exhausting, but I love the bones of him and life is never boring!

Haha, I was thinking this the other day. DS2 LOVES to chat. I was driving him to the golf course last week, just the 2 of us, DH and other DC were at home so he got to sit in the front with me.... and did not stop till the moment we arrived! I was exhausted from listening to it, but could tell he was so delighted in having a captive audience that I think I’ll try take him out on (short) drives more often.

I have this with one of my children. I have been very consistent in explaining and enforcing my boundaries. That way he does feel rejected, I don’t feel exhausted and (very slowly) he is learning to manage his extroversion.

This is me and DD1. I am a complete introvert and she is extroverted to every last cell in her body. I am greatly anticipating school this fall and I feel guilty about that but the other DC are more like me and we enjoy quiet days at home.

DH and I are very much introverts, and as it happens so is DS. Sometimes when his street-rat friends are in the house he comes to us quietly and asks us to tell him loudly he has to have dinner/ go to the postbox (or whatever) to get them to leave for a bit!

I have often thought how difficult it would be if DS was a big extrovert.

I’m so relieved I’m not the only one! I was fully expecting to be flamed.

I’ve tried establishing boundaries but she’s very sensitive to rejection. Bless her, when she picks up on me being stressed (long before ds or dh would ever notice) she gives me big cuddles and tells me stories or invites me to read a book to her ... when I just need 2 mins to myself! But she needs reassurance that everything is ok, so I stretch myself to give it to her in the way she understands. Because cuddles and stories make everything ok. Arrhghh!

And then dh comes home and wants to tell me about his day I want to scream at him.

Sometimes when his street-rat friends are in the house he comes to us quietly and asks us to tell him loudly he has to have dinner/ go to the postbox (or whatever) to get them to leave for a bit!

Ha...I used to be like this! My DM was very good about being used as an excuse a lot. She was always happy for me to I say that I wasn't allowed to go places! DM is also an introvert but an awful lot more sociable than I am and she once told me when I was older that she had been disappointed that me and siblings didn't have lots of friends around all the time as she'd imagined being a great host at playdates etc! DS is only 15months so who knows what he'll be like but he loves to wave at everyone, no matter where we go. I'm the sort to studiously avoid eye contact in the supermarket and now I have to stop and talk to everyone!

4Point I used to ask my mother in front of my friends if I was allowed to do this or that activity they had planned and give her “the eyes” which meant please say no!

I'm an extrovert and my dd is an introvert , I do all sorts of embarrassing things for her and apparently I'm not funny ( I actually am 😂)... we don't have anything in common except I Lubs her 🤷‍♀️