I’m a bit off when it comes to being cuddly/tactile especially in public, but I’m generally more affectionate when I’m the one initiating physical contact and feel like I can get away (IYKWIM?)
However, one thing a lot of men I’ve dated have in common is that they’ll try to hold me when I’m trying to pull away. I don’t know if you guys know what I mean but here are some examples
For example, kissing a man goodnight in his car. I pulled away because I was done, however he tried two more times to hold me in place with his hands in my hair. I didn’t say anything but owing to this I did not see him again.
Another occasion, I went on two dates with a man who kept trying to hold hands or stick to me in some other way. All very lovely and fine for a little while but whenever I tried to let go he would snatch my hand back or cling onto it to the point I had to get quite stern with him, to the point that again I didn’t want to see him anymore.
Final example, I dated someone for a few months and this was part of what killed it for me. Whenever we hugged as a greeting or goodbye I’d be done after ten seconds or so. But if I tried to pull away he would basically bear hug me for another minute or two, until I really started making a fuss.
Probably made me feel worse due to the fact I’m very small and he was around a foot taller. I found it intimidating occasionally.
So tell me, is it just me? Are all men like this? Is it normal?
I’m not very good with physical affection (it’s taken a lot of learning and even then a lot of the time I just about tolerate it, though I’m partial to spooning) but it makes me feel freaked out when I feel like I’m being forced to accept affection that I’ve tried to get away from!