if you met your DH/DP over 30, how quickly did things happen?

[TagliatelleNests]

Is it true things generally move quicker than in a 20-something relationship?

Met late 30s (tinder), moved in within a year, bought a house at 2 years, got pets at 2 years 2 months (😃), got engaged at 3.5 years, will be married within 5 years

I think things can move pretty swiftly in 30s as you are more likely to want to settle down plus have kissed a few frogs so hopefully know what you're after by then

Well. There lies the problem- although I read that a PP was in the same boat as me and it worked out well.

I will say, I don't recommend going to NCT classes and having one of the icebreaker conversations be 'what did you do for your first anniversary' when the answer is, erm, it's not happened yet. I remember feeling suddenly really judged and irresponsible, which I could have done without.

Met in July, moved in September, bought a house in January! Pregnant in October, married in April. Our daughter was born 2 years and 2 days after we first met. We both were on the same page, having sown our wild oats in our 20s.

Not me but a very good friend met her DH on a date (in respect of which she had little patience or expectation and nearly cancelled twice) wheh she was 35 and he was 38.

Four years later they are a
very happily married with a two year old dd and a baby on the way this summer. Happy days - they both seem genuinely delighted with life atm

I met DH at 30. At that age I wasn’t willing to invest more than three years without a commitment. I figured (worst case scenario) that gave me time for at least 2-3 failed relationships and I could still have a baby by 40. DH would have strung it out for longer but he knew I’d dump him if we weren’t engaged around the 3 year mark.

So yes, it was probably faster because I was 30+ and not willing to waste time on a relationship that wouldn’t lead to marriage and a baby. I was more focused on the end goal and more determined to leave if I didn’t get what I wanted.

Met when I was 32 and he was 33. Married at 35/36. First baby at 38/39, second at 40/41. Not sure if that's any quicker or slower than anyone else.

Had a failed marriage in 20s. Met DH at 32. He's 5 yr older and had been single for a long time. We married within 18 mo of meeting and live happily child free. We met through online dating.

We were 46 and 53 when we started the relationship, and bought a house together 18 months later; that seemed pretty speedy to both of us (but no regrets!).

Met at 33. Sex on second date. Engaged after 18 months, married within 2 years, first baby 9 months later and second one die 2.5 yrs after first one. Followed a relationship in my 20s where nothing happened for 8 years! Been a busy 5.5yrs.

Met DH when I was 32 he was 29. Married at 2 years 1 month, DS at 2 years 11 months. Planning TTC DC2 end of the year!

We met at 31/32 didn't move in together for 6 years. But very happy in our own home nearly 8 years after meeting. He is my world.

We were 29 & 30. Met in the May, DP never really left after the first time he came to my flat, but officially moved in in the November. We got engaged nine months after meeting, married 13 months later and had a baby within 18 months. We’ve been together nearly ten years now, have children and have bought two houses on our way up the ladder.

So yeah, we caught up with friends who met in their early twenties pretty quickly.

Met dh when I was 56 , him 55
We knew at 5 weeks we wanted to be together.
Was mortified the first night I stayed at his house and had to ring my son ( who I lived with) to tell him I wasn’t coming home!!!

Very quickly, after 5 months I was pregnant. Not planned though. I think it would have been a year - 18 months if the plan had worked. We’re not married because I don’t want to.

And I was a granny as well!!
Twice over

Met at 34 (he was 33), moved in together when dc1 on way who was born on our 2nd anniversary of meeting, dc2 19 months later, married 15 months after that. Now trying for dc3!

I was 29 and dp was 35. We were married and had DC when I was 33.

My godson is 14 this year, his mum and I are 51 this year, so she was 37 when she had him. I remember her saying 'met, married and pregnant within a year, not bad, eh?'.

She was desperate for a child by then. The marriage is a disaster and she's been living a separate life from him for five years and for the last two trying to get him to leave the home and agree to a divorce. It's not pretty.

Not worth rushing if you ask me.

I was a couple of months short of 31. We were married and trying for a baby before by 33rd birthday and had two close together.

Met 32, married 35, first baby 36, about to have second at 38. Even if it all fell apart and we divorced I could never regret the opportunity to have a family, so I don't feel we rushed.

If you want a family then age certainly sharpens the focus.

Plus I found as I got older I knew what I wanted more from a relationship. (I.e. if I'd met my first boyfriend at 30+ I would have realised we had nothing in common and moved on in weeks - in my teens I dated him for years because I didn't have anything to compare so thought it was normal).

Met dh when we were both 32.Went on holiday after 8 weeks together,pregnant the month after,married 3 years later.

Met when I was 31, he was 51. Engaged at 33, married same year, baby the following year.
It's not been easy as he'd never been married before or had children as I get the impression he was a bit of a commitment phobe. But I'd still do it all over again.

Very - I was 31 and not overly interested in getting involved in anything. I had plans. Anyhow, we met on a plane, turned out he was nearly five years younger, which turned me off, and turned him on. I made him work for it, which he did. We were married a year later. Shortly later, I caught a stomach virus that wouldn't go away - she's now 14! Twins are 12.

We were both 31, moved in together a month after we met, got engaged 3 months after we met, and got married a year after we met :)