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What could you absolutely not do without when having a baby?

88 replies

QueenOfIce · 26/01/2019 12:30

Being childless myself I have no clue about the needs of babies! When you had your baby looking back what would you tell a first time mum she absolutely needs?

So far we've got,

Ewan the dream sleep
A sling
A baby formula machine thingy wotsit (she will be unable to breast feed)

She has a good support network but no partner so anything that will make life easier when she's on her own with baby especially at nighttime.

Thank you!

OP posts:
drspouse · 26/01/2019 13:08

Oh and we didn't really use muslins much. But neither of ours were sicky.

SarahAndQuack · 26/01/2019 13:10

Mothercare often do packs of muslims with cute prints. I quite liked them.

Btw, after clarabell mentioning boxers - if she ends up having a section, you can get special post-section knickers from mothercare. They are designed so they don't hurt the incision site. My DP really rated them.

jomaIone · 26/01/2019 13:13

A bouncy chair with a vibrate setting! The only thing that helped my baby nap when she was tiny! We had a Joie one which was just amazing!

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QueenOfIce · 26/01/2019 13:18

Jomalone I have just been looking at that exact one and came back to ask about it! Do all babies like swinging chairs?! Would it be ok for a newborn? Sorry for all the questions!

OP posts:
Dandybelle · 26/01/2019 13:18

I bought an electric tommee tippee steriliser and all the bottles that came with it, and discovered that even the number one teats were way too fast for my daughter and we switched to mam which are slower and anti-colic, but the main perk is they self sterilise, so you just put the bottle together differently with some water in the bottom and pop it in the microwave and done. No need for a steriliser at all. Fabulous invention.

The other thing we've loved is a sleepyhead, baby is 8 weeks and is doing 7 hrs a night and I'm inclined to believe it's been made easier with the sleepyhead. Though they aren't for everyone!

My mum got her some sock ons which are nifty especially when it's cold because babies socks fall off constantly.

Isofix car seat bases make life a hell of a lot easier too.

KondoKonvert · 26/01/2019 13:19

Tuppence and crumble star fleeces are fantastic for keeping the baby cosy in a car seat. Also good to replace trying to get wee arms and legs into snowsuits/pramsuits.

Ribbonsonabox · 26/01/2019 13:23

Next to me crib and a moses basket with a rocking stand. I also had a great wooden play gym thing from IKEA that kept the baby entertained for ages which was great! A pop up play pen is a good idea as I found it's easier than completely babyproofing every room... could just pop up the playpen in whatever room I was in, say doing the washing up, and baby would happily play and watch me from playpen. I also had a carrier which was a God send it was a baby born one that you could have the baby front or back facing in. It was really comfortable.

Wavingwhiledrowning · 26/01/2019 13:29

A giant muslin. I got given one as a gift and wasn't sure what I'd use it for. Three children later and I wouldn't be without it. It's a cool cover in summer, a window shade, a swaddle, a feeding cover, a sunshade for the pram, a cover when they're napping in the pram, I could go on forever! I don't think there's anything I couldn't fashion without a giant muslin and a couple of clothes pegs! Grin

Jackshouse · 26/01/2019 13:36

GMtoBe thanks. This will have us a fortune this time round!

OP if she has a c section then she will need some where high to change the baby upstairs and downstairs. We used the cot top changer upstairs and the dining table downstairs and used the baby bath on the kitchen sink. She won’t be able to do washing, hoovering and changing the bed for months so she will need help around the house.

Narya · 26/01/2019 13:44

Bouncy chair (mine hated the vibrate setting though!) We swapped out the vibrating one for a second hand baby Bjorn one which was amazing.

Galt inflatable playnest is really useful

Aden and Anaïs muslins are the best imo but expensive, we only had a few

Any of the Lamaze pram toys

Never used: Ewan the dream sheep or any other white noise generator, sleepyhead, swinging chair. Didn't use a sling much.

Littleoakhorn · 26/01/2019 13:51

A sling was a life saver. I had a babybay side car cot, so I didn’t have to get out of bed at night. Home made frozen meals were great but remember to cook for the time of year when they will be eaten. Warming beef stews are great in January but seem a little heavy in the spring. I had a Moses basket on a fold-up rocking stand for downstairs and used the changing mat for baby to lie on in the bathroom. Both my dc loved the sound of the shower and hairdryer when they were newborns, so I was always clean and dry!

Nothisispatrick · 26/01/2019 13:52

You can get muslins in loads of places, they’re literally for wiping up sick and snot and dribble so I found any will do, you don’t need expensive ones.

Thing is it’s really hard to say until the baby is here, as the baby might hate swaddling, white noise might not work for them etc. For DD we couldn’t have lived without-

Sleepyhead
Bouncy chair
Changing mat that we just put on the floor. She’s generally happy to just lie on it and wiggle around.
Curved Ikea pillows. We use them to prop our arms up when holding her and she likes sitting in them. They’ve genuinely made our lives 10x easier.
Our nappy bin in the living room.

I could have absolutley done without

Any outfits that weren’t just babygrows in newborn or 0-3 month sizes.
Loads of bibs. Dd didn’t start dribbling until teething and isn’t particularly sicky so we have loads of tiny bibs that were never used.

Nothisispatrick · 26/01/2019 13:53

Oh and her grosnugs for sleeping were great. I didn’t want her to sleep in blankets and she was too small for normal sleeping bags.

Hairymess · 26/01/2019 13:56

Loved the Angelcare bath seat - before we got this, it was a two man job with a tiny wriggly baby and clueless parents. Once I had this, I could do it myself much more confidently.

Recommend Cheeky Wipes or a cheaper/homemade equivalent (cut up old towel and a Tupperware would do). SO much better for cleaning off poo than disposable baby wipes, plus cheaper in the long run and better for the environment. Can later use them for getting food off hands and faces (also way better than normal wipes), wiping down the high chair, wiping food splashes off clothes, cleaning faces/behind ears etc in the bath...

I had a very cheap, second hand vibrating bouncy chair which was brilliant. And also a second hand gym with lights and music to lie the baby down on, for stimulation (and to drink a cup of tea). No need to pay loads for these things as many people use them for a couple of months then sell them on in good condition for much less.

Infacol is good to have on standby in case of colic.

Lots of sheets for the cot/crib. If she's getting a Moses basket or crib now then a cot or cot bed later, she could just get the bigger size flat sheets and you can tuck them under the smaller size bed. Saves a bit of money if needed.

Baby sleeping bags! A must. Preferably the GroBag brand. Expensive new (eBay or TK Maxx are often a bit cheaper) but if you look on Facebook marketplace or eBay or whatever then you could get some second hand bargains. You'd need a few, and in different tog ratings.

MeetOnTheledge · 26/01/2019 13:58

I didn't get on with slings at all but the over-the-bath baby bath was invaluable (our basin is pretty small). So different things for different people. We had a basic bouncy chair and a snuggly playmat/gym which were both usec a lot.

Nothisispatrick · 26/01/2019 14:02

Surely you only need different tog rating sleeping bags for different times of the year and therefore in different sizes? DD is a winter baby and so far we’ve only used 2.5 tog. Won’t need lower tog until summer when she’ll be much bigger.

IrregularCommentary · 26/01/2019 14:42

DD started teething not long after 3 months. Sophie was way way too big for her mouth ~and consequently completely fucking useless~

I found matchstick monkey a complete lifesaver. Loads smaller so she could really chew on it and actually hold it by herself too.

Bubba1234 · 26/01/2019 14:45

Don’t need a walker or a changing table
Do need a million bibs

SheChoseDown · 26/01/2019 14:50

Perfect prep???
I just take a flask of hot water and a bottle of cooled water. Cost me a fiver for the flask. Easy peasy.

Bath thermometer came in very handy as I have no idea what's too hot or cold just by touch

SarahAndQuack · 26/01/2019 14:55

That's not a safe way to make formula (unless I am misunderstanding you).

You need to make it with very hot water so that the heat sterilises the formula powder, which sometimes contains bugs. If you mix hot and cold water, or if you put a smaller quantity of hot water than recommended on the powder, you risk not sterilising it effectively. If you dilute it more than recommended with the cold water, you're making it less nutritious than it's meant to be, which would become an issue if you did it regularly.

Hen2018 · 26/01/2019 14:57

Nappies
Pushchair

I’m not entirely sure what a muslin is and why everyone else bought one.

Hen2018 · 26/01/2019 15:00

Also, bought a £3 fleece blanket from Primark which was just the right size for car seat, pushchair, in the cot during the winter or as an emergency play mat/put on the ground to lie on.

WhatNow40 · 26/01/2019 15:18

I think the most important thing you can have when you're a first time mum is a

fuckit buckit

It's so easy to stress over doing the right thing all the time, getting the perfect routine, feeding them the 'right' way and so on, it can all become overwhelming.

A good friend who has had a full nights sleep is someone who can really help with perspective. Or could be a total bitch. If you can help your friend to learn to not sweat the small stuff and to physically or mentally chuck something in to the fuckit buckit, then she will have a very special gift.

The fuckit buckit helps you find 10 mins to sleep when you're baby sleeps, to let go and accept help, to navigate contentious topics with ease and not worry about the snarky comments at baby groups. Chuck it all in the fuckit buckit and your baby gets a chilled mummy, not a stressed out zombie on their last nerve who could scream at anyone, at any moment.

And a fuckit buckit is free!! Bargain. Grin

Nothisispatrick · 26/01/2019 16:02

Yea I second that isn’t a safe way to make formula. Just use the premade bottles when out and about all day, they cost like 70p.

thornyhousewife · 26/01/2019 16:10

A sleepyhead for the baby and lots of new versatile loungewear for me.