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Feeling down and crap and rather put down.

2 replies

Somerset1972 · 25/01/2019 10:43

Sorry to come and moan but I just want to moan! Because I’m miserable! My dog I had for 16 years died a few months back and I can barely stand to be in the house without him, had a full on breakdown after he died and have been thinking of just ending it all on and off, I’m really trying to get back on my feet! Sounds stupid over a dog I know but he was my non judgmental best friend who saw me through some bad times. My dad died 3 years ago too young from cancer and I have responsibility for my gran with dementia (her confusion leaves me feeling totally overwhelmed). I also have three kids myself one with many health problems that’s been in and out of critical care all year with complications from her illness. I don’t get any help from family my mum just got back from her 8th holiday in 12 months!. I’m working part time evenings at a hospice recently changed over from days as I was finding it too stressful with my dds illness in the day. Despite me and my partner both working we’re still seriously skint and I felt like I’d been put down so bad by my friend the other day for wanting a credit card! We’ve not had a holiday for years and I need around £1000 towards a new bigger car. I’ve got 3 kids in a bloody Toyota Yaris!! She was so patronising saying ‘oh we would never get anything on finance, my husband will only ever pay for anything cash outright, it’s just a bad idea and something you should never ever do’ is it really so bad maybe having 6-7k debt if we are paying it off? It’s ok for her to say that because she has never had to want for anything! Her husband is involved in dodgy dealings and has made thousands from it (I know this as fact) he’s self employed and ears around 30k a year in cash jobs and only ever declares 10k to hmrc, so, they get maximum amount of tax credits for their 5 boys (all born before the cut off for cb, tax credits etc). The extension she’s just has built is unreal, no cost has been spared all paid for in cash, nice car, foreign holidays every year, mum cleans her house dad ferries her kids around everywhere, she’s never had to work! She just made me feel like a useless human being for needing a credit card, my dad is dead and my mother hasn’t seen her grandkids for 5 weeks! I feel close to the edge and just need a break! I don’t really feel safe in my car when I’m working at night, there’s a lot of driving down big roads as I’m community based. Am I really that much of a shit, stupid irresponsible person for wanting a credit card??

OP posts:
Annunaki · 26/01/2019 11:33

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BlueBrush · 26/01/2019 12:47

Sorry you've had such a bad time. (And it's not stupid at all to be grieving for a pet that you love.)

Your friend's opinion was just that - one person's opinion. And she sounds pretty lucky to be in a position to not have to contemplate debt. My own opinion is that debt in itself isn't a bad thing, as long as you can manage it and have a plan to make sure you can pay it off. Think carefully about how to finance your car, and I really hope for a bit of luck to come your way! Flowers

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