DD obsessed with becoming a big sister

[Jinglebells321]

....but unfortunately we have no plans to have another.

She constantly talks about "when she becomes a big sister", comes up with possible names for her baby sister, is always looking at my stomach in hope.

She also always wants to pretend I'm pregnant and always wants me to shove her doll up by top - it's starting to concern me.

She's only 4 so still too young to understand that we're not having another (I would try but dh doesn't want another plus I'm prone to miscarriages so getting pregnant would be a challenge).

How to I deal with this and not encourage her but at the same time not have to bluntly tell her she's going to be an only child.

I already tell her we don't need another they as she's all we need but that doesn't seem to stop her.

Any suggestions welcome!

I'm guessing that some of her friends or children around her are getting siblings so, being 4, she just accepts that is what happens in life and assumes it will happen to her too.

I would encourage her imaginary big sister play with dolls and explain that families come in all shapes and sizes. Personally I would avoid definitives at that age - you never know what life has in store - which also stops you having to answer the why questions.

There’s nothing you can do until she grows out of it. It’s hard when it triggers uncomfortable feelings but that’s for you to deal with.

You could use it as the chance to discuss again with your dh?

I think 4 is old enough to understand tbh.

DS1 is 4, very much wants another little baby brother, but I’ve told him that I can’t have any more babies.

He did ask why and, like with anything, I’ve explained the medical issue in a simple and age appropriate way.

So in your case you could say that trying to have another baby would make you very poorly, and your doctor told you not to. She doesn’t need more detail than that.

DS1 has understood and stopped asking (which for me was a relief as I feel a bit emotional about not being able to have more).

Tell her and then suggest to wash and clothe one of her baby dolls and take it out for a stroll.