How would you deal with this? (Long)

[ForeignnessAlert]

Abroad, so if school procedure seems weird that's why, but not relevant to what I'm asking.

DS, 9, ASD, ADHD, probable dyscalculia, maths is huge issue. Had text from his TA on Tuesday to tell me he had a maths test on Wednesday. I'm informed of tests because if he doesn't know routine is different he panics.

After school Wednesday I ask how the test went. He said he didn't have a test only Yr 1 did (mixed class, Yr1/2). Asked if he was sure as TA had told me, and it's a bit weird only half the class would have a test. He was adamant he hadn't had one. Asked if he had homework, he said yes he had a book to show me but had left his homework folder at school.

Later that afternoon, I get a phone call from another parent asking to swap parents evening slots. Clearly the letter should have come home, but hadn't.

Today I get a text at lunch time from TA saying she wanted to give some positive feedback after the letter in his contact book, DS read well and used clear sentences when explaining the text.

When DS came home I asked if he had homework, he said no but he had a letter and the book (he should have brought yesterday). He went to his bag, turned his back to me and got them out of his folder and gave them to me. Put his folder back in his bag this should have made me think!

Letter says: DS had huge problems with maths test, despite being with TA in an absolutely quiet room on his own. He had no motivation ("it's not fun"), no initiative, could orient himself in 100 space, doesn't manage anything even with 10 sticks and dice, makes mistakes between 1-10, needs every question to be explained, has no concept of numbers. Tomorrow they are starting subtraction 0-100.

We chat over supper about need for maths etc. He's still adamant he didn't have a maths test.

Just before bath, I ask if he didn't have a sheet with parents evening times on it. "Oh, yeah." He gets it and gives me three sheets of paper. One is homework, due tomorrow. One is parents evening. One is his maths test. He got 14/47. Answered 14 questions, rest is blank. Note from TA to say he had to guide him through each one.

I have said I am disappointed that he lied to me about the homework and test. He said sorry. DH said he could do homework instead of bed time story.

I am at a loss of where to go from here. I'm not angry about the results, I'm fuming he lied about having no homework and about having the test.

I would say, he's 9 and has additional needs, he was wishful thinking. Hoping it would all just go away.
Have you tried getting him any additional helpp with numbers? I would try out www.khanacademy.org/ it's free and they will start very basic numbers with number lines, counting, etc. He can watch the videos they have over and over if he likes, they do a practise at the end and he can do it in the privacy of his own home with no pressure.

I get that. But the telling lies is not ok for me.

Yes, I do extra maths (to try to keep him at class level) with him during the holidays. We do some at the weekends. Try to recite tables in the car but he usually refuses to join in. Point blank refuses any board game or card game. He has a few maths apps, including ones supposed to help people with dyscalculia. We've tried locking treats in a box with the padlock code being the answer to sums, linking screen time, using objects (Lego, sultanas, lentils, cusinaire rods). I bought 8, 20 sided dice for him to do sums with (so that he didn't have a sheet of sums to scare him off and no one was giving him sums)