I’ve had a breakdown

[nervousbreakdown]

According to GP anyway . I’m on sertraline , and now something called busiperone to try and calm me down .

My thoughts have gone all strange and I am finding I either can’t sit still or I can’t do anything . Having nightmares when I sleep and having very odd thoughts when I’m awake . I’ve never felt like this before and it’s very frightening .

I’m a student so live in halls of residence and rather alone - family know but they are
too far away . Closest relative - geographically - says she can’t help me as it’s too much for her .

I genuinely don’t know what to do except sleep and eat occasionally . I’ve been signed off uni for a year so lots of forms to fill in but I’m struggling to just leave the house never mind worry about a form !

So today I did the washing , took me 3 or 4 hours up and down to laundrette (I only do once weekly as too expensive to do more) , but now have lovely clean jammies on . Also had a lovely hot shower before bed , complete with new shampoo and conditioner , used a face mask and eye cream and some lovely shower gel ... feel very pampered ! With the washing being on I challenged myself to walk twice . Once round the car park of my block and then back in via a different entrance , and then the opposite route an hour later. Literally a two minute walk each time but that’s the first time I’ve stood on the street since December .. I’m running out of diazepam though and that’s concerning me a lot .

That's fantastic! You've achieved so much today, I used to be chuffed if I brushed my hair and washed my face on the same day!

I'm so glad you have a uni support worker and your lecturer sounds lovely. Hope your appointment went ok x

Please ring Samaritans freephone 116 123. Talking to them about your anxiety will be a comfort for you.