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Abusive and threatening boyfriend

2 replies

Indigochi · 17/01/2019 16:28

So basically my SIL(20) has been accused by her boyfriend(22) of cheating on him. I don't personally think she's likely to have done that I think it is more a misunderstanding as they are both young and live in different cities, however I don't really care either way. Unfortunately her bf is not a nice character, he sells drugs, has been involved in gang violence, has hurt her physically. Nothing major but any assault is unacceptable clearly. She isn't exactly an angel herself, she has been know to exaggerate things and wind him up. Problem is I have seen screenshots of messages from him threatening to 'mess up her pretty face' and that if she doesn't come and meet him tomorrow him and his 'boys' will come to her house whilst her family is in and drag her out to beat her, even made threats to shoot her etc. He isn't the most mentally stable and despite her sometimes exaggerated claims the messages I have seen from him do seem very irate and likely to happen. Ideally I would have nothing to do with this as I think it's ridiculous but unfortunately I don't think she has anyone else to voice her concerns to as although she still lives at home she has no relationship with her mother and her step dad is emotionally abusive too. She says she will go and meet him tomorrow but she's scared and I'm just wondering what I can advise her. No judgemental comments please this isn't my problem I am merely trying to advise her of the safest option

OP posts:
FissionChips · 17/01/2019 17:56

She should contact the police and show them the threatening messages.
Contacting women’s aid would be a good idea, they can advise her of the safest way to leave, provide help etc.
The freedom program can help her understand the nature of her relationship and how to avoid those relationships in future .

It’s unlikely she’ll do those things though and if she does, she’ll probably still go back with him. Usually takes many attempts before a woman finally breaks free.

Whocansay · 18/01/2019 19:35

Well I doubt meeting this psychopath alone is the safest option! If he's threatening to hurt her in front of her family, imagine what he could do to her alone?

Call the police!

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