To feel extremely sad that I'll never have a career as a Midwife?

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I always wanted to, but never did.

Now I'm married and have a small DC. I just don't see how I'd manage it.

I'd need to do an Access Course, and then could possibly apply for university places on a Midwifery course. However, I'd still need GCSE English and Maths (I believe), before I can do any of these.

I have worked in a clinical setting since the age of 16, as a Medical Secretary. Then a PA, and now a private sector PA. The money is extremely good, and I worked my way up quickly, but it just isn't my calling.

How would university possibly work when I have a small child, who needs me to be mum? Furthermore, how would studying for all these things work at all? We couldn't afford not to have one of us working. It's all very well on shifts whilst training to be a MW, but those shifts aren't always the same. I can't command childcare at the drop of a hat. Childminders need regular children.

Realistically, DH's salary alone is too high for any help as it is.

Has anyone done this as a mature student whilst having a child to care for too?

Thank you for any input you may have

The training to be a midwife is grewling, at midwife's do 6 weeks or so at uni then 6 weeks or so in placement where they do the same shifts as their mentors, having very little say on any working hours. They do not get the long summer holidays just a couple of weeks. It is so hard. There are other jobs in maternity care though.

My friend is doing it with a 3 year old and a 1 year old. She has lots of family around to help with childcare, and she's incredible busy, but she's doing it.

You can! I did it with 3 smallies and 3 hr round trip everyday. Also, 4 years cause in Ireland. It's hard but doable. Go for it!!

I'm not able to train as a nurse for similar reasons- childcare- wish I'd done the training after a levels when didn't have the responsibilities I do now
However there are a lot of interesting and rewarding roles in the nhs which would give you good experience then maybe you can do the training when kids are old enough to not need child care

I feel exactly the same. It's been my dream since I was a little girl but life has thrown some curve balls at me and it's never come about. Along came disabled DD who will need my care for the rest of her life. Childcare versus training/shift patterns etc just isn't an option. Add in a dose of low self esteem etc etc.

I've looked into it many, many times. Via the access course an overall distinction is required as a minimum. Applicants for the actual midwifery course is then in its thousands (literally) for apx. 15 spaces. The access course is then only valid for 3 years.

Grulling doesn't even come close to it.

The ambition and thirst for it does creep in from time to time. I just keep pushing it down. It does get slightly easier as the years go on although it does still reduce me to tears from time to time usually when drunk

Not sure if that's what you want to hear or not. It sucks.

Same here op, I’ve worked in care since I was 18 and then got a job in the NHS I did start my training and completed 1st year but then fell pregnant.

I now work in district nursing as a phlebotomist and doing dressings, support visits, palative care etc and because I’m already in the nhs I can apply to complete through the open uni so should be easier for me with 3 children (youngest is 3)

There are band 3 and 4 positions in the nhs where you get to work alongside midwives. Try that when you can and go from there.

I think access covers you for the GCSE gradesz

If our want to do it, you will figure it out.

Could you look into being a doula / hypnobirthing instead?

You could be working until you’re 70- that’ll be a hell of a lot easier doing something you’re passionate about.

I’m sure it’ll be tough, but the course and the journey to get qualified is temporary.

Would anyone be able to clarify if I'd need to do GCSE maths and English in addition to the access course? Or is it something the access course will just cover?

The way I could do it would be moving back near my Mum and Nan... they'd 100% have my little one whenever I need the childcare. But my DH will not move areas

Unless I possibly drop him off there when I need to be at placements etc. But how would I ever study?

Jump I'm so sorry there are so many obstacles for you. I can't even see a way forward really and I only have the one DC with no additional needs

Life can be so cruel.

Both of you get a say about where you live! Can you get the access under your belt part time, then your small DC will be a school age DC.
Also, if the uni has childcare students, see if one of them would like to nanny for you, if they are a student they might be ok with ad hoc hours (rather than regular hours an established nanny or childminder would want.

It is totally doable if you're really determined. It won't be easy, but you can do it.

Me too op, I may still do it in later life but who knows.
To be honest, the shifts wouldn't work for us anyway, so if I had trained before dc then I probably wouldn't be doing it now anyway

Op I think you do need maths and English gcse as well as an access. Usually a science gcse as well

It's doable if you really want to do it.

But I would look at it from another angle. I'm in the nursing/midwifery profession myself and it's hard long hours and that does continue after the training (people forget that that continues forever when you've qualified.) It's working with people/general public which is tough going sometimes and there is a lot of stress involved.

I do know a few people who've crossed this bridge and took the leap, some people love it and never look back, some wonder why they left their well paid decent job for this life of stress and tiredness

It's threads like this that make me quite sad because pre bursary cuts a couple of years ago you probably would have been able to do it a lot more comfortably.

If you end up doing it OP, great. If you don't, there are plenty of negatives that you've avoided, childcare and life balancing aside. Pros and cons to everything.

It's not "grewling" 🤨

It's tough, but bloody brilliant if you're doing something you love and it will be worth it.

I hate it when people come on here and just love slagging off midwifery and nursing degrees.
Yes it's hard juggling babies, kids, uni and placements but it's absolutely bloody brilliant at the same time!
I'm going into my third year and I love every part of it.

Get your GCSEs/level 2 maths and English sorted now while the kids are smaller, but it is not too late my friend trained at 41 once both children were at school. They made the shifts work particularly as she preferred night shifts for childcare reasons. It has made her so happy.