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Original poster

Have you ever turned down a job? Would you turn down this one?

25 replies

GirlWithABrokenSmile · 15/01/2019 15:22

I have never turned down a job, and I'm wondering if I should this time. Or if that's unusual!

I had the final stage of a job interview yesterday. I presented to a panel of seven for an hour. Before that I had presented for half an hour virtually, and had two phone rounds. I came out yesterday feeling that it wasn't the right place for me. It was disorganised, they admitted that there is little structure, they weren't the friendliest of people - they tried but it didn't feel genuine. They spent a portion of the interview talking about the owner wanting to be bought out in the next three years so she could retire, and the companies financial issues.

If I'm honest, it wasn't well located and I had concerns before I went but they were keen to meet. I left and was so sure they wouldn't offer me anything.

They did. They've cancelled the rest of their interviews this week and offered me the job at a fairly good salary, and even offered to make it more flexible as a position for me for a few months until I move/getting there gets easier. They seem very keen and supportive and they've already sent me an offer letter and a voicemail congratulating me and welcoming me aboard.

But my gut is screaming that this isn't the right opportunity. DP thinks I should turn it down (probably because I talked to him immediately after I interviewed). My current job is nice but not as well paid, although it has potential and we're managing fine. Everyone else seems to think I should take it because its more money and I can always quit if I hate it, but I don't want to mess them around.

It's a senior position. I'd have influence and I'd be responsible for fixing my department and then taking it to the next level, which could be a great experience, albeit stressful. I'm sure I'd learn something from there... but my heart says it's not for me and I'd hate it.

Would you go for it? I feel awful that they seem to have presumed I'll take it... is it stupid to turn a job down if it's more money?

OP posts:

Standstilling · 15/01/2019 15:25

Go with your heart. And your intuition.

BarbaraRoyale · 15/01/2019 15:26

I'd go with your gut instinct, if it doesn't feel right now it never will

RtIock · 15/01/2019 15:27

That's on them for cancelling the other interviews, you might of had other offers and also it's a two way street you have to like them too.
I've turned down two jobs after an interview before, one was similar to you in that i just knew I would hate it, the culture wasn't a good and it seemed all over the shop.

Interested in this thread?

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Jobs

NorthEndGal · 15/01/2019 15:28

Yes I have, but it was because another offer came through right after at a higher pay and half hour closer to home.

TheVonTrappFamilySwingers · 15/01/2019 15:30

Came on to say go with your intuition. I did the same as you and took a job that had all the alarm bells ringing like yours did. Totally regretted it. Lasted 6 months. Miserable the whole time.

Snowangel23 · 15/01/2019 15:37

Please listen to your gut. Been there and not listened (or not in the position to listen). It was as awful as my gut predicted.

MrsJamin · 15/01/2019 15:39

People turn down jobs all the time, an interview is as much for you to know about them and it sounds like what you found out made you not want the job, so turn it down!

veggiepigsinpastryblankets · 15/01/2019 15:43

I think it's very telling that they spent the interview telling you about all the company's problems and now are acting as though of course you'll say yes to their job offer. They sound like the kind of employer who think they're doing you a favour by giving you a job and don't realise it goes both ways.

ContessaIsOnADietDammit · 15/01/2019 15:43

Turn them down.

PaintingOwls · 15/01/2019 17:57

I work somewhere that exhalts the opportunity to "build" your own team/role/whatever. I must admit I fell for it too. I'm not enjoying myself at all and I'm a junior member of the team. The senior members tend to leave in 9-12 months for something sane and stable.

I very much doubt they have cancelled, they would be idiots to do so. They're just trying to pressure you into saying yes/make you feel special.

hatethinkingupnamechanges · 15/01/2019 18:11

Trust your instincts, you have them for a reason. I once took a job despite every single alarm bell ringing at the interview.

They treated me absolutely appallingly. The job only lasted a couple of months, and I was miserable the whole time I was there. It was a very management heavy structure and it turned out my particular boss had a reputation for treating the minions in the office badly and had a very high staff turnover of non-managerial staff.

Took a long time for my confidence to recover after that job.

MissingGeorgeMichael · 15/01/2019 18:13

Go with your gut and turn it down.

Foxyloxy1plus1 · 15/01/2019 18:19

I turned down a senior position in a school once. I couldn’t reconcile the ethos of the SLT to the job title and description and it was apparent looking round, that what they were advertising was really not what they believed in.

When it came to the final interview, I said that I didn’t feel that their ethos chimed with my views. They asked if there was anything they could do to change my mind, but I knew neither of us would change, so I walked away.

Go with your instinct.

Fairylightfurore · 15/01/2019 18:22

Going against the grain here I would take it. Sounds like there's a lot you could bring to the table around improving structure, organisation and atmosphere and if there's an out ( when the owner moves on) you'll be well placed to move onwards and upwards with loads of good experience and interview fodder.

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira · 15/01/2019 19:01

I’m with @Fairylightfurore but then I’m going on the assumption this is a fairly small company you could really make a difference which would be fantastic on your CV. Push comes to shove, you could turn everything round in a year then move onto something much better.

bibbitybobbityyhat · 15/01/2019 19:04

I've turned down loads of jobs and left loads of jobs. I'm very fussy and won't do a job I hate for anything.

Listen to your gut!

Schoolchoicesucks · 15/01/2019 19:09

It sounds rather like my workplace OP!
It sounds like it could work well if you can see it as a place where you're there for 12-18 months to build your skills and then get out with more experience and higher salary to negotiate from.
But don't get stuck there. Even if they continue making things flexible for you. Or paying you more.
Bitter voice of experience.

EBearhug · 15/01/2019 19:13

I initially turned down my current job, so expect them to try and persuade you otherwise. (I'm now a month short of my 15 year anniversary... Not all been plain sailing by any means.) I have been in other interviews where I would have turned it down if offered. Interview are two-way things, definitely.

minkies11 · 15/01/2019 19:14

I would politely decline - not sure you would get the autonomy to make real changes and have a gut feeling they've moved a bit too fast and seem too eager to reel you in. Been in a similar position before and ignored that little voice at the back of my mind urging caution to my detriment! Had to introduce 'structure and progression' to my department (finance) but ended up fighting for resource, working 50+ hours a week and banging my head against a brick wall! It was my first 'Senior' position as well. They saw a mug coming and got me good!

lightlypoached · 15/01/2019 19:42

An interview is as much about you interviewing them to see if they are a good fit fir you. They don't seem it.

I turned down a very well paid job for my current role. Best call I ever made.

Trust your instincts.

MrsJonesAndMe · 15/01/2019 19:57

I'd leave it and keep looking. Valuable experience in interviewing and figuring out what you do and don't want - so not wasted at all.

fieldofwheat · 15/01/2019 20:04

Can only repeat what others have said - absolutely trust your intuition. I turned down a job at the last moment having initially accepted and waited months for checks and notice period. Several things started ringing alarm bells and I'm so glad I (eventually!) paid attention to it. I'd already resigned from my job so had to take a temporary contract with my employer but that turn of events sent me down another path and on to bigger and better things - sometimes you have to go through these things to get some perspective/clarity...and it's all good experience. Good luck with whatever you decide.

BeachtheButler · 15/01/2019 20:32

Yes. I went through the interviews and the final thing was lunch with one of the firms partners. There I discovered that the job as the partners saw it was considerably different from what those lower down the line had told me. I thought about it and withdrew next morning. With hindsight it was the best decision I ever made. The job I was told about I could have done. The vacancy the firm wanted/needed filled was way above my competence levels at the time.

If you've a bad feeling - go with it.

teacuptale · 15/01/2019 20:42

I think you should go with your gut. I’ve turned down jobs before. I’ve also taken a job where my gut was saying no, and I ended up regretting it. I’m a firm believer in being happy in your job.

Isleepinahedgefund · 15/01/2019 20:47

A job interview works both ways - they get a feel for you, you get a feel for them. You are as much entitled to turn down the job on the basis of the impression you got from the interview as they are to give you the job because of the impression they got from the interview.

Go with your gut.

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