You know when say 5 people are chatting In a group and one person mainly only looks at say two people

[LardLizard]

Am I right in thinking that, the ones she’s looking at are the ones she likes best ?

I’m talking a whole evening of mainly looking at two people in a whole group

I’d agree unless it was a specialist subject the two would be best placed to know about, e.g. a show all three watch but the others don’t or a place they’d all been.

No specialist subject chats just general chit chat

Maybe they are more interesting?

can be social anxiety? I do this in groups, I concentrate on the people I know better or am more comfortable with. I realise I look rude and I try very hard to not do it but it's my anxiety.

I have to force myself to look at everyone in the group as I often notice I look at the people I like the best. It's not great, but it's unconscious until I specifically make the effort

I'm conscious that I do this when one or two people make me feel more comfortable or I know them better.

I had a work colleague who had a really intense stare . She was great to chat to but I just couldn't handle the amount of eye contact she was giving out!

It can be really difficult to look at everyone when you are focused on what you are saying. I would only read something into it if it happens every single time, no matter what position people are sitting in. I don't think it necessarily means they like them more either. It could be that somehow they are seeking the approval of the more dominant members of the group iyswim.

Maybe they’re nervous. Maybe they know those two people best. Maybe they think the others are just not worth their time.

Either way, you kind of have to let it roll over you even though it is hard.

had a work colleague who had a really intense stare . She was great to chat to but I just couldn't handle the amount of eye contact she was giving out!

I do that to counter my unease of making eye contact. So I overdo it!!

I’m an introvert so I get this ALLOT.

It makes me back away and not contribute to the conversation at all.

I end up silent, uncomfortable and with that overwhelming anxiety induced need to run away.

If you do this, I get your explanation as to why you do it, but from the other side of it, it’s utter shit.

I do that to counter my unease of making eye contact. So I overdo it!!

Don't you understand how intimidating that is?

crosser I'm an introvert and like I said above I would do this because of that and I hadn't even considered I may be making someone else who's an introvert even more uncomfortable, I just thought I looked weird and rude.

It is a way of dismissing someone and in a non verbal way telling them that they do not matter at all and are not even a speck of shit on their shoe worth even a look.

That’s how it makes me feel anyway.

Surely you look at the person currently talking, don't you?

Were these two people hogging the conversation, or do you mean that when the person is talking they are talking to these two more than the other two? Could these two have been giving more receptive non-verbal signals ('i'm interested in what you're saying' etc)?

I think it's often the dominant and louder personalities who people direct their comments to. That's what I've noticed at my workplace when there are group discussions and chitchat.

Anxiety?

Some people are just poor presenters and focus on a few people. Sometimes it's familiarity but other times it's their weakness.

Nope. I look at the people who are looking at me

OMG I have no idea who i look at in a group. probably who is speaking? staring at somebody else who is not speaking would be odd wouldn't it?

Mumsnet always introduces me to new things to feel self conscious and paranoid about