Can you remember the last time you were honestly happy?

[user83921]

I was thinking about this this morning. Can you remember the last time you felt truly happy?

Im by no means depressed, but I think I'm always waiting for something to make me happy, new job, new house etc. But when that comes I still don't feel the happiness I crave.

I'm not sure if I have an unrealistic expectation of what happiness is, or feels like.

Does anyone else feel similar?

Feel it was about 5yrs ago. Since then only brief flashes of pleasure perhaps but generally just down.

DP and I went away for a few days over new year and I was very happy most of the time, being by the sea, exploring a lovely area; that always makes me happy. I do have a lot of happiness on the whole.

I felt really happy this morning in the swimming pool!

I'm usually happy - I have what many would see as idyllic life. I'm a sahm to 3 dc, great extended family, enough good friends, no money worries. Lovely pets, time for yoga & running, lovely life generally. My DH loves me, and is v supportive. I have nice neighbours. I'm lucky, I think.

So much so, that when something horrible does happen it really does affect me. My Dad's death put me out for about 4 years, (I drank too much to get over it, and I still do- I'm the classic wine o'clock, affluent, mum). If any of my dc have worries, it affects me deeply. I worry a lot, mainly about things that might not even happen. I worry about my dc's future. I stress about their schools. I stress about my health, because I want to be around for my dc as long a possible. My mum really upset me recently, when she said she'd renewed her passport, and "it'll probably be the last one I'll need!"

Politics and the news make me feel v miserable and vulnerable at the moment. I try to not let it affect me, not always successfully.

*And I'm up way to late again!

I was depressed for years (from age 7, clinically depressed) and have times now when I'm down and irritable. Single mum of 3 with no help doesn't help. Someone once said, or I read, that when you've been not happy for so long that you fear being happy because it's so unfamiliar and do t know how to be happy. It requires so personal effort to allow yourself to feel joy when your personality has been more Scrooge than Mary poppins for most of your life. It's possible though. You just have to give yourself permission to be happy and believe that you are worthy and deserve happiness. That takes some doing but worth the effort.

I have happy moments...happy hours...happy days. In between I have shit ones. Isn't that life? Nobody is just "happy" as a permanent state of being.

2007

I’m actually quite happy all the time. Combination of being an alarmingly positive person with a good sense of humour I think, as my life certainly hasn’t been a walk in the park, with abusive parents, ex, chronic health problems, but there’s so much that gives me happiness, it’s easy enough for me to focus on that instead. I appreciate having this mindset is lucky.
Specifically tho, this morning, my fiancé made me happy. Just him looking like a sleepy pudding. Like I said, it’s the simple things.

2008
With clarity

I’m happy a lot. Definitely every day. I like my life.

A loooooooooooong time ago

I get where you are coming from OP, but I've started doing meditation and honestly it's the best decision I've made recently. It encourages me to start a gratitude journal and everyday I think about at least 5 things I'm grateful for and note it down. I'm now starting to experience happiness!

I'm happy every day, now, and have been for a while. Not because everything in my life is perfect, but enough things are, for me.

I've learned to appreciate the tiny things as well, so something as simple as fresh bed linen gives me a little rush of happiness.

I'm happy most days. Our life is no different to anyone else's we worry about money, careers etc (No DCs) and right now I am really unhappy in my job but trapped in it for financial reasons, but I'm still happy!

I find the stupidest things to be happy about, yesterday we got a new doormat, today the coffee I made myself wasn't as awful as usual (DHs job usually but he's away), Ddog was being particularly cute earlier, I've found something good to watch on Netflix this evening etc etc. All totally minor things but I like to try and take the positives where I can, I think life would be pretty unbearable otherwise! My happiest moments though are just me DH and Ddog hanging out together doing nothing special, I always feel very grateful for what I have in those moments.

Woke up pretty happy this morning, with a bright eyed giggling DD (instead of one I need to shoe horn out of bed and sleep walk to school!).

Really beaming happy yesterday when DD (physical disability) got her 5 metre swimming certs front and back. She worked so bloody hard for them, and I don't know who was more delighted, her, me or her amazing swimming teacher!

Last April, I was truly happy when my long term partner got home from a long trip overseas. I felt so content and happy and loved with my little world.

Unfortunately he dumped me a month later so apparently the feeling was not mutual

Having typed that, I realise now how low-level unhappy I have been since, even after the initial shock wore off. It's not a good way to be.

I define happiness differently. I laughed like a drain in the time that my teens came downstairs and had a chat with me before going to school this morning. Moments like that are what keeps me going.

I've been suicidally depressed and my focus is on not being unhappy rather than being happy iyswim. Stable and calm with happy moments is what I want and I achieve that regularly.

Yesterday on my lunch break. I was walking through a local park because I've made a New Year's resolution to go for a half an hour walk every lunchtime and there was a little teddy Bears Picnic set up and a tent for a little local playgroup and it was so cute it made me smile and feel really happy.

Last summer watching sea turtles swimming and frolicking I had a brief moment of life joy.
Have recently lost my mum. My dad died year before. I think after raw grief and lingering grief both do what they have to do and I learn to live with the loss I can see happiness on the horizon. Have had 5 or 6 years of being very worried for them, lots of caring and concern. All an honour but very worrying and tiring. Feels bad to say this but at the same time as missing them and not really having taken in the death of my mum yet I think no longer having all of that care and concern will be welcome too.

A few moments here and there but nothing sustained. The period when I was happiest was between the ages of 27-30 for me. I am now 53. That makes me sad typing that.

I think I have the capacity to feel tremendous joy but I am not somebody who can transcend their circumstances. Be happy no matter what is just not me. The circumstances need to be right.