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DS can't sit still

2 replies

Meckity1 · 14/01/2019 15:55

Hope I fit everything in without it being a novel. And I know it isn't ideal for chat but I've no idea where else to put this and I'm not sure what I need to google.

DS is in year 7, and is considered bright. His teachers in Primary school thought getting 100% in his SATS was a realistic target, lots of examples that aren't just doting mummy, more than one credible source etc.

He's in a very academic high school and isn't doing well in the tests. This is 'only coming third in class' not well. He is doing fine with the topics, seems to understand everything that is going on, no complaints from teachers, no issues with behaviour etc etc Again, not doting mummy, he knows all the answers, but he's missing stuff.

He says it 'physically hurts' to sit still in tests and I've seen that at home where he really can't sit still for eg bedtime story. He always seems to need something to fidget with, eg he will be playing a game on his Xbox but also have a Youtube video on his PC, never just one thing.

I'm slack with computer time, but no electronics after @ 7pm, we all eat at the table without electronics, he sometimes plays football in the street under his own choice etc. After 7pm we hang out, he reads, I've got him mindfulness colouring books etc.

I'm uncomfortable asking questions at school, as there is stuff going on in the school and I don't want to get a label on him if it can be avoided. I have had no complaints about behaviour and I don't want him 'managed out' as it is incredibly oversubscribed, I mean, ridiculously. The school can really pick and choose. But if he can't sit still for tests, he's going to be in trouble. I suspect that because he picks things up quickly that it's covering issues, but I don't even know what names to start googling.

All help and suggestions about where to start looking gratefully received.

OP posts:
DeathyMcDeathStarFace · 14/01/2019 17:18

I don't want to jump on the autism bandwagon, but have you looked at aspergers?

Ds1 has high functioning aspergers and sounds a bit similar to your ds apart from the sitting still bit, but it presents in many different ways.

He wasn't diagnosed until he was 11, it is not always an obvious diagnosis and he is so highly functioning he is nowhere near needing extra help in school so they didn't identify it for years.

To anyone who didn't spend much time with him he seemed NT, but i saw the repetitive actions in him, he can concentrate better with something to fiddle with (he has a soft toy humming bird and a penguin - he's just turned 18!), he does multiple things at once like watching videos and playing Minecraft. (But, all 4 of my boys will do that) etc. Might be worth thinking about it.

Or it could be something like dyspraxia, or it could be there's no reason. Sorry, not helpful.

Meckity1 · 14/01/2019 19:14

@DeathyMcDeathStarFace Thank you, it is helpful.

I've wondered about autism. He has an amazing memory, but that could be just a good memory, and I'm not sure about how well he reads social cues sometimes. I'll go away and look at autism because I know so little about it.

Thanks for giving me a starting point. I'm floundering. Hope your son is flourishing

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