Sahm bored out of my mind - how do I change this?

[Januarybringstheblues]

I'm a single sahm and I attend college one day per week, studying an access to HE course. I'll hopefully be starting my degree in September.

My child is in nursery and attends 3 and a half days per week. On one of those days, I do a couple of hours of voluntary work.

I've applied for jobs and have been invited to interviews but the hours are always impossible - late finishes and weekend work. I have zero support to help me with this.

I feel like I'm stuck in a rut and I dread each week. The highlight of my week is college because I can socialise and keep my brain busy.

What can I do until September? I'm so bored and lonely.

Do you get out and about to any local toddler groups?

Can you find any playgroups which run on the other days? Is there a local mums network on Facebook where you live?

What will you be hoping to study in September?

Can you take up some exercise classes or home workouts?
Sounds boring but it does pass the time give a little high then maybe go to bed earlier make the week go quicker..it’s tough when there small but things will get better when there older you do eventually get your life back

On the day when dd isn't at nursery and I'm not at college, we go to a class but that's only for an hour. I just feel like I'm lacking the stimulation and social side of having a job to go to. I have an interview next week but the hours are 9-6pm. I can't find a childminder who has availability so it's a no go. I just feel like I never really achieve anything with my days/weeks.

I'm going to be doing a degree in occupational therapy.

The open university has loads of free courses you can do, you might want to look and see if there is anything that will enhance your access course, that you might need for a future career or even just something that you find interesting?

Exercise classes are an option, but I just feel embarrassed that all of my friends (including those who have children) manage to hold down a job and have really busy, fulfilling lives, whereas I'm here twiddling my thumbs waiting for September to come.

Can you really not think of anything to occupy yourself?
Do you have no hobbies or interests at all?
Could you volunteer locally?
Perhaps start a small business?

The only limit is your imagination.

I don’t know how old your child is but when I was sham I was rarely bored, mine didn’t go to nursery. We spent our time playing, going out even if to the local play area, library where there is always someone to talk to. Life is so short when they are little make the most of your time with them.

I was told to look at MOOC - loads of online courses including degrees I think. I was too lazy to study it properly but will when I have more time on my hands.For some you can do a course for free then pay 45$ or whatever for the certificate to show you have done it. My friend did something about social media and society.

For social contact try Meetup groups which you find on line and just see what there is in your area.

Have a look at FutureLearn website, it has lots of free short courses on all sorts of subjects. If there is nothing relevant to your career, just do something for fun!

Or what about decorating your house? You won’t have much time for that once you start at University.

Are you interested in politics or any specific issues? You could join a political party or a campaign organisation.

Find a toddler group, they usually last two hours

Find a backlog of books to read, take your DC swimming (see if your local area has a parent and child swim session), take them to any local museums/galleries, go to toddler groups/story time sessions at the local library, walks in the park, crafts/baking at home etc. Make the most of the free time before you’re knees deep in uni work .

That's the thing - I feel ridiculously boring because I've reached my late twenties and have no real hobbies or interests .

I've tried online dating and feel like ashamed because when people ask me what my hobbies are, I have nothing to tell them. All I do is look after dd and go to college - when I'm on my own, I read or watch tv.

I feel guilty for saying this and it's completely pointless anyway but I feel like having a child much younger than I'd planned as just put a huge pause button on my life - this is not the life I imagined for myself .

If you’ve got a garden, you could grow some vegetables, now is the time to get organised!

Can you read music? If not, you could learn by learning to play an instrument such as the recorder.

Lots of people have no hobby.
I think you need company rather than stuff to do but unfortunately you can't find instant friends. So the other option is joining clubs/ classes/ volunteering so that over time you will gradually get to know people through that or else the mums and toddlers groups.

Why don't you volunteer in a healthcare situation?

I've heard OT degrees require you to be proactive, so I'd practice some of the soft skills, so I would feel more comfortable.

How about starting a group for parents in a similar situation to yourself.
Should be easy enough to run using SM.
You could then organise outings with the kids or try new things without the kids.

Maybe print some flyers and distribute at your child’s nursery or baby groups.

You need to find your people then bounce some ideas around.

Have a look and see if you have a workers education association near you. I have done a few courses with them quite cheaply, from silver jewellery making to ceramics to a local history one.

You may have no 'hobbies' but you obviously have interests. What has made you want to study OT? What grabbed your interest in that? What volunteer work are you doing? Why that particular thing? These aren't hobbies - but they are your interests and that makes up your personality and who you are. Be proud of those. As for being bored on the days when you are with your child. One hour long 'class' is not enough. Stay and Play sessions are usually 2-3 hours. Take your child to your local library - just read together - there will be other children and adults there. Go to the park - again plenty of other adults and children there.

I already volunteer in a health care setting but I could gain even more experience in a different setting - OT is really varied so I suppose I could explore different avenues relating to that. Doing a free open uni course is appealing too.

Thanks everyone. I'm sure I'll find ways to fill my time until September