Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Cat we have rehomed hissing at us

89 replies

why100000 · 05/01/2019 11:22

She must be scared - she is 6 years old and has lived all her life so far with her previous owners.

Now she is in a completely different environment with strangers - it must be terrifying.

Is this why she is hissing at us repeatedly, or is it because she is underlyingly aggressive?

She has a whole room to herself at the moment, with everything she needs in it, and we go in every so often to visit. When she feels more confident we will give her the run of the house.

What can we do? It’s a bit scary to be honest as the other cat who has spent a lot of time at our house (that we looked after for a friend) never hissed once, and was pretty good natured.

We need to take her to the vet to get her registered, but tbh I am scared to try and pick her up.

Have we made a mistake if I can’t even cope with hissing Sad.

Any advice welcome. She is half tabby, half siamese and looks really switched on.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
9
AwkwardPaws27 · 05/01/2019 16:37

Be very careful with cat and guinea pig - a neighbours cat broke in to our run and bit one of the guinea pigs, breaking her scapula.
She recovered with pain relief and antibiotics, and lived to the age of 7, but it was awful, and I felt terrible (I was stupid, the doorbell rang and I left the garden for two minutes, I'll never ever leave a small animal in a run again).

Original poster
why100000 · 05/01/2019 17:34

Thanks for all the continuing advice. Good to know that other people also had hissing cats that they were scared of!!

We have opened her door so she now has the run of some or the house, though the room the living room door is closed for the moment as that is where the guinea pig is.

She did come out into the downstairs hall where I was standing (as unobtrusively as possible, and I was there first Grin!!) and hissed at me.

We’ve bought some more Dreamies (her owner her given us some), a couple of catnip toys and have ordered the heliway which is coming tomorrow. I guess we need to take it slowly and lose the fear!

OP posts:
Original poster
why100000 · 05/01/2019 17:35

Ha ha Feliway

OP posts:

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Cats
Original poster
why100000 · 05/01/2019 17:35

I think we have rushed into this too much, without thinking it through.

OP posts:
Original poster
why100000 · 05/01/2019 17:36

Sorry about the typos

OP posts:
Zofloramummy · 05/01/2019 17:42

At least she is coming out! I had a kitten living underneath the sofa for about 3 days! They get there eventually it’s just all new and rather overwhelming.

headinhands · 05/01/2019 17:48

My rescue hissed at first but she is now the sweetest thing ever. She will still yeaowl if I ever have to pick her up but doesn't struggle. She has taken her time to become fully relaxed. I would say she's now fully settled and it's been just shy of 2 years 2 years. Only recently wanting to actually sit on me occasionally instead of next to me.

flameycakes · 05/01/2019 17:53

Cat's like height to observe btw, they do this till they get a lay of the land x

flameycakes · 05/01/2019 17:54

The lay of the land x

Harebellmeadow · 05/01/2019 18:11

Could you maybe leave her alone for eg 2 weeks, meaning don’t go into the room except to give food and clear litter, no loud noises in the house, dont seek her out or look directly at her. After a few days or weeks, at night, leave the room door open so she can roam the house. Valerian drops and catnip scattered through the room will help.
Dont seek her out or stare at her at all, you are right that she is terrified. I dont think it is urgent to take her to the vets unless she is ill. In time she will calm down and get to know you and her new world.
Dont let her out of the house though.

Harebellmeadow · 05/01/2019 18:20

My 2nd kitten was the cutest ever, but noone wanted him because he was generally terrified. Of everything! Including his own tail! He hid under my sofa for 6 months, after which at night he would nestle at the foot of the bed in the dark, running if i turned over. I learned to lie very still. It took about a year till i could stroke him, maybe a few years till he got really confident (garden roaming and rat hunting helped -yuk- but 12 years later, after the death of beloved DearCat1, he is the cuddliest furball ever.

So you may have to wait a while 😆
The best way to win your cat over is to totally ignore her, plus food and treats and drugs ❤️

Cat we have rehomed hissing at us
agenuinestubbs · 05/01/2019 18:28

Yep she will be completely fine. Just give her time, this is very scary for her.

Some advice from a veteran cat rescuer:

  • put something in the room that she can hide in/under. A blanket draped over a bed/sofa is good. She can go in there and know that she is secure.
  • keep her in the room for a few days. You should go in a few times a day so she gets used to you. Sit on the floor so you’re at her level
  • don’t try to stroke her or pick her up, let her come to you. When she does, hold out a hand palm up so she can see you’re not holding anything. Let her sniff you and get used to your smell.
  • speak to her softly so she can get used to your voice
  • don’t outstay your welcome. At first just sit in the room for 10ish minutes. She’ll be stressed at first.
  • after a few days you can leave the door open so she can explore the rest of the house. She may make straight for another hiding place but just humour her

This is totally normal for a rescue cat. All of mine (who turned out to be total lap cats) were the same.

IndigoSpritz · 05/01/2019 18:31

Has anyone requested pictures of hissypussy yet ? It's normal/expected/required on pet threads.

Original poster
why100000 · 05/01/2019 18:39

Here she is Smile

Cat we have rehomed hissing at us
Cat we have rehomed hissing at us
OP posts:
IntentsAndPorpoises · 05/01/2019 18:44

About 12 years ago we adopted two very timid cats. We never saw them and when we fed them some juicy tuna they would pop out from under the sofa hissing, grab it and disappear.

They grew to be very affectionate and loyal cats, but it took time. We spent time in the room reading and just being there without engaging with them.

One of them died last year of cancer and I miss her terribly. She used to sleep in my pillow at night. Her sister is still with us and very brave now.

Urbanbeetler · 05/01/2019 18:52

She’s very beautiful.

I have a friend who got the scariest cat ever from a rescue. He lives alone and felt he could offer a home to a scared mad cat.

The cat totally shredded him on arrival as he took her out of the carrier then shot behind the furniture. For a few weeks the cat hid or hissed from afar and he totally ignored it other than to feed it and make kissy noises from time to time. It was a very hot summer and one day he stripped naked and fell asleep on top of his bed.

He awoke with the cat stalking round him, all his bits vulnerable. He stayed very still, really scared. The cat sighed and fell asleep on his chest, and they remained friends for many years. But we all knew who was in charge.

IndigoSpritz · 05/01/2019 18:58

She looks like a Nervous Nerys, OP. I expect curiosity will get the better of her before too long and she'll begin to explore her new home.

wowfudge · 05/01/2019 19:08

She's beautiful! Just be patient and respect her space. She'll come to you eventually.

headinhands · 05/01/2019 19:30

Oh my she's gorgeous and you have no reason not to expect her to settle in her own time. I'm currently giving dcat emotional support as dh is drilling on the other side of the room and she's looking a bit freaked but not enough to move so she's right by me.

Harebellmeadow · 05/01/2019 20:17

Oh she is beautiful. Can i have her as a friend for my boy???
Just joking. Take your time with her, she will come to you when ready.
YY to hiding places. And keeping her in one room for now, with very few, short visits.

CallMeSirShotsFired · 05/01/2019 20:27

OP I have fostered lots of cats who have since gone onto forever homes, including some very nervous and traumatised ones.

I simply let them out in my house and left them to it. They had food and water, blankets and litter tray (same brands, and types and items from previous homes). I would talk to them all the time as I walked past or was preparing their food, but otherwise pretty much ignored them till they were ready.

  • And as cats are so insulted at being ignored by a mere human, they have all pretty quickly come to investigate me!

Give it a few weeks and let her settle in.

Original poster
why100000 · 06/01/2019 11:34

Thanks for all the advice.

Things are getting better - the cat is still hissing at times, but also playing with my two dds, and rubbing up against the younger/smaller one especially.

The Feliway has arrived this morning and we have plugged it in - I don’t know if that is instant and is already helping.

She pooed outside the litter box - quite far away from it. I don’t know why - the other two times she has used the letter box.

She seemed to somehow lunge for my youngest - but didn’t hurt her - not sure what was going on there either.

Any more advice welcome Smile.

Here are some more photos:

Cat we have rehomed hissing at us
Cat we have rehomed hissing at us
Cat we have rehomed hissing at us
OP posts:
Potentialmadcatlady · 06/01/2019 11:47

She is beautiful. I would totally let her be- almost to the point of ignoring her- if she comes to you then give her attention but only for a few seconds then leave her. Make sure she has food/warmth/water/clean litter trays with her normal litter in them in various places and just let her get used to your household noises/movements/quiet times etc.
I have recently turned two feral cats round by doing the above- they hissed/hid/fought the other cats for weeks. I ignored, kept them warm,safe and fed them little and often. It has taken a while but those two are now v affectionate cuddle monsters. I don’t believe there isn’t a cat that can’t learn to trust given time and a lot of patience. Some may not become cuddlers, some will adopt the whole family, some will only learn to trust one special person ( had a previous feral foster like that- I was her person- everyone else had to leave her alone)
She needs time more time then even more time and she will be grand.
My lot also live with piggies and rescue rats- it can work with some rules in place- esp for the kids

TooGood2BeFalse · 06/01/2019 12:18

What a gorgeous cat!!
Won't repeat the PPs advice as all good stuff.Just letting you know when I got together with my XH, he had a very angry Siamese.She despised me.Bit and attacked me and every opportunity, especially if I went near XH. I was more of a dog person until I met this young lady Grin She eventually accepted me, then became my biggest fan - to the point where to this day, she is my shadow.Sleeps with me every night, adores the kids and is a really good girl.She came with me post-divorce Grin

You wouldn't believe what a little cow she was to look at her now!So def keep doing what you are doing

POllOcKs · 06/01/2019 12:38

We rehomedto rescue cats.One was super confident and the other day on the top of the kitchen cabinets for a few weeks while we were around.She came down but still popped up if anxious.
We let ours roam the house but kept some rooms closed until we were confident that they would use their litter trays
Would second the training them to run to the sound of dreamiest being opened,very useful when catching them for a vets trip!