6 weeks pregnant with my first and feeling overwhelmed and scared. Help :(

[Scarednewmum2be]

Hi, I've recently found out I'm pregnant, I'm just over 6 weeks and feeling extremely overwhelmed and anxious. I'm happily married and we were trying however I guess I didn't think it would happen so quickly. I done a home pregnancy test which was positive and I have the doctor on Monday to confirm I just know I definitely am. I missed my period which never happens, sore breasts, nauseous and very emotional. I could cry at the drop of a hat. I can't understand why when I wanted to have a baby I'm now feeling down and scared and just overwhelmed. I cannot get to the excitement stage and I feel so guilty for feeling this way. I'm worried about a lot. Worried that the house we have isn't right for a baby as it's small, not much room to entertain any visitors that will want to come and visit the new baby and just not how I pictured things for when I would be pregnant for the first time. We have been looking for somewhere else but the right house hasn't come up yet. I'm also worried that I won't have a clue what I'm doing, that I won't be a good enough mum, that I'll let those around me down. I also worry about the effect me being a mum will have on my existing friendships. I don't want to lose the friends in my life and the times we share, but with this being such a massive change I'm worried that I will. I know that sounds so selfish, and that life inevitably does change, and I know it is a blessing and I know this baby is wanted. Is it my hormones or why am I feeling so emotional and worried about something which I should be jumping for joy about? Maybe once I have my scan I'll put all these silly worries out of my head. Any advice or reassurances would be extremely appreciated. Thanks xx

Breathe. I have three wanted, planned kids and I've done this every time I watched the extra line appear in front of my eyes. Give yourself some time. It's not every day you hit a life changing moment and have to turn academic, intangible wishes into a battle plan.

It is a huge step in life and it is right that you are taking it seriously. All these things that you mention can be managed. The baby isn't coming tomorrow, you have time to sort things out. Try to calm down, spend some time getting used to the idea, and then you can start your planning.

Thanks ladies for the reassurances. I thought there was something wrong me feeling like this instead of being really happy. I guess I just need to let it sink in and not overthink things xx

It took me a while to get used to the fact I was pregnant, I could have written your post word for word at 6 weeks. I'm 26 weeks now and I still get a bit freaked out sometimes, but I am so excited to welcome our daughter. You've got this!

Thanks RosiePosies, feels good to hear you could also have wrote my post at 6 weeks. I guess this is all new to me so there's bound to be all sorts of emotions. Thanks again to all you ladies

Totally normal IME. I got pregnant with DD1 straight away so even though we were trying we'd hardly had time to get our heads round the fact that we were trying IYSWIM. There was definitely a period of 'holy shit what have we done?' and several periods of absolute terror at the prospect. But they are phases and only to be expected with such a huge change ahead of you. You will get past it and then the excitement of planning will kick in.

Absolutely normal. It’s a huge life changing thing and it’s normal that you’re a bit floored by it all. Congratulations x

So so normal. I felt exactly like this, and did for all of my pregnancy. I was actively trying for a baby and then as soon as I got pregnant I desperately wanted not to be.

It is all hormone related, and possibly linked to pre natal depression.

We now have a one year old who is the absolute best thing to happen to us.

And when we got pregnant we were renting a one bed flat. We managed to buy our house at 7 months pregnant, there is still all the time in the world to get ready for your new arrival. Babies don’t need much room. We have friends that have moved into a new house at 38 weeks pregnant. You will be fine. Just the fact that you are worrying so much means you’ll be a wonderful mum.

And on a final note re. friendships. My social life has actually got better since having a baby. You just have to plan a little more.

It's completely normal. Don't worry.

Has the doctor asked to see you? If you've had a positive test the GP won't do anything to confirm. You need to make a midwife appt.

Thanks ladies. Loving Mumsnet and so happy I signed up as I feel better from talking to you all 💕 My doctor wanted a urine sample so must be being thorough I guess. Assuming they will then refer me to midwife. So much to learn but luckily I have time 🙈 xx

@Scarednewmum2be I am in the exact same boat as you. We were told it may be a little tricky for us but I fell 2nd month of trying and was absolutely gobsmacked. I'm almost 9 weeks now and I've had horrendous morning sickness (aka all day long sickness) which has made me feel far worse I think. We have a tiny living room that I worry about space for toys/entertaining etc but I'm sure this won't worry me so much when they're here. I was desperate for a baby and I can't wait until they're here but it obviously a massive change to get our heads around! We've got a few more DIY and home decor bits we need/want to get done as well so I'm but worried about money too!

@canonlyhopexo I know exactly what you mean and hoping the same as you, that I won't worry so much about the size of the house etc one the baby is here safely. It's not always easy though to turn off the worrying 🙈 morning sickness doesn't help either, not sure if you've tried it but peppermint tea gives me some relief xx

@Scarednewmum2be it's so easy to say isn't it "oh don't worry it's normal to be worried etc" but it is really hard to switch it off and crack on with life until they're here! I don't have any pregnant friends although my sister has 1 & 2 year old so I have her on hand. I've tried everything. 3 different tablets as well from dr! Xx

I remember sitting on the loo looking at a positive pregnancy test and absolutely freaking out about giving birth
What you feel is normal
You will feel excited and happy as the pregnancy continues and baby kicks Weirdly when you have a sizeable bump and baby kicks away it feels more ‘real’
And btw no one knows what to do the first time round You your husband and baby will learn together
You’re going to be an awesome mummy

Thanks @Heatherjayne1972 for your reassuring words. I really hope I am awesome. I guess the less pressure I put on myself the better and hopefully everything will work out ok. I know what you mean @canonlyhopexo that it is easier said than done trying not to worry. I find the days I am off work and have more time to think I'm worse so going to occupy myself as best as I can. Hopefully morning sickness will pass soon 🙏 xx