How do you make new friends when you don’t work?

[FenellasRedVelvetDress]

I am a middle aged woman, living very rurally, in a small but ‘active ‘ village. The village is full of cliques of people who have been here for 30+ years, glamourous younger couples or elderly people.
I haven’t worked for a few years (health reasons).
I used to have a good group of friends however I was horrendously betrayed by my best friend and had to dump the whole group of crossover friends as I didn’t want to have any connection with anybody who was connected to her.

I have made friends with a couple of village women but have recently discovered one of them has lied to me and I feel that I do not want to carry on this friendship any more as I can’t trust her. No trust no point. I want a friend who I can talk to .
I have some horrible moments in my life and I really miss having someone to talk to. I know my mental health is suffering as I have to keep everything jammed inside me. My self esteem is rock bottom.

How on earth do I make new friends at nearly 50 years old? I feel so very ashamed that I have nobody.

Oh OP that sounds very lonely.

Can you volunteer for a local charity or at a school? How about joining a book group or evening class? Look at the notice board in the local library or shop. Find people wirh similar interests to you and friendship will come.

Do you drive? Can you try www.meetup.com ?

Start your own meet up group?

I second the book group suggestion. Mine are my favourite people and I didn't know any of them before I joined.

Can you use MN too listen to your thoughts and about your day. I have and this really helped me. Give it a try x

I have made some very good friends through joining a choir, and also through being a school governor. I don’t make friends easily being very introverted so in both cases it’s been a slow burn, but the result has been a few people of the “would call in the middle of the night in a crisis” variety,

I’ve been a school governor, and because of my medical problem I don’t think I could volunteer as I can’t commit to specific times and days -hence my not working.
I have tried joining ‘ groups ‘ in the village but they were just all elderly people who I have zero in common with.
Sole -yes I drive and I have my own car. But I don’t like to go out much on a night mainly because DD and DH are both autistic and are both a bit needy of me.
I was so excited when I got married as I was looking forward to doing ‘ couple’ things - dinner/supper parties, weekends away together and with friends, drinks at the pub or at home with friends ........but we haven’t got any. He barely leaves the house and doesn’t like any husbands of people I have tried to befriend.
I’m sooooooo lonely. My best friend is my dog 🐕.

Try meet up. Pay a bit per month and advertise your own group.

Oh, you have a dog! See if there are any local dog walking groups (fb tends to have them). I’ve made quite a few good local friends over the last few years by joining a local breed specific group. It does walks four times a week and I go twice a week.