Fear of the dark

[GummyGoddess]

While pacing in the dark to get DC2 to sleep, it occurred to me that he and DC1 (2 years old) aren't scared of the dark. I definitely was at that age and remember being 18 months old and scared of it (still am a little).

Do you think that it could be linked to being left in the dark when little by parents? Could it be an innate, primal fear from when humans were vulnerable to predators, if so then why does everyone not feel scared?

I was left but have never left either DC, I have video monitoring and as soon as I see DC2 stir I head in to cuddle him back to sleep. If I haven't been able to go immediately then he just lays there calmly playing with his hands. DC1 doesn't need this as he is a great sleeper now.

Just idle curiosity, I don't fancy starting a bunfight about sleep training but I'd love to know your answers.

No help at all, was coming on to say “fantastic song”.

I’ve never been scared of the dark if that helps!

It is a great song! Didn't think when I wrote the title though

I don't know. DD wasn't scared of the dark until she was about 4 and imagination and nightmares kicked in. She was always very much a go to bed when tired child. DS doesn't seem bothered now, but as a baby wouldn't sleep in a totally dark room. But we lived in a city when he was born, so it was never completely dark because of streetlights.

My first 2 slept in dark rooms, and did self settle, and didn’t start asking for nightlights or doors to be left open until around 4, when they started waking with the odd nightmare, now & nearly 10 & 12 they still like a light on...

I would have thought if it was from being left alone in a dark room then they would ask for a light as soon as they were vocal?

Or maybe i have scared them for life 😬

Maybe it's nightmare related? I still get night terrors sometimes which doesn't help.

I was up late at a family gathering when I was about six, and was sent off to bed on my own as it was past my bedtime. And I remember my uncle looking down the dark hallway towards where the bedrooms where (all lights off) and saying "Aren't you afraid of the dark?"

To which my parents both hastily hushed him and said, "No she isn't, don't say anything."

And I distinctly remember being confused and wondering what I was missing.

So I do think, if you've never heard any ghost stories etc at an early age, then you don't know that there's anything to be scared of, and you don't associate the dark with anything awful. (Of course I was brought up in the late sixties/seventies. When TV was SO much more limited. Now I don't think a child could avoid seeing scary ads and movie promos.)

Sorry, I didn't comment on the fact that you were scared at an age when ads etc wouldn't have made an impact. In which case could it be a fear picked up from the body language/tenseness of the adult holding you. All young creatures learn to fear what their parent fears.

My 4 year olds school buddy (y6) very kindly told him monsters live in wardrobes and come out at night. SOME BUDDY!

I wasn't allowed to watch even 30 seconds of television until my brother was born at around 19 or 20 months and my mum needed some time to deal with him! I definitely had nightmares before he was born though.

Maybe it's some unlucky genetic predisposition to be scared of things.

All young creatures learn to fear what their parent fears.

I'm not sure that's true. I'm scared of dogs - because I was bitten as a child - DC1 isn't scared, DC2 is. I think it's more down to personality. DC have never been left alone at night if they're upset. I was always punished for having nightmares so it was clear for me that I'd never leave them alone if they wanted me. I've just spent the past 3 hours dozing on the edge of DC2's bed. DC2 has had a night light since she asked for one, DC1 doesn't want one. DC2 has nightmares 2-3 times a week, DC1 maybe once a year.

I am still scared 😫
Funnily enough not outside, just inside a quiet house

DC has a little light