If you enjoyed Christmas in general and Christmas day, what things made it enjoyable?

[Nineoutoftenducks]

I have not enjoyed Christmas for probably 10 years, so rather than wallow in misery I thought I'd try and find out how to get it right!
Granted one of the things not helping is my current and not very happy relationship but that aside I'm sure there is more I could do.
The children seemed to enjoy things but I think they could get more out of it.
In previous years I have closed my ears to the post Christmas chat because I've found it painful to listen too. This year I'm working on the basis of no pain, no gain so fire away please (even with tales of holudays away and lavish gifts!).

Going for a walk to get fresh air
Keeping the number of people manageable
Not having too much to eat so I didn't feel bloated (did a big meal, but chocolate scoffing kept to a minimum)
Playing relaxing Xmas carols
Keeping presents minimal

Spending it with family, there were lots of us. It was magical. Also the presents and the food were great too.

Appreciating Not being at work for a few days and alternating between having busy days and completely chilled days.
M+S food to order to avoid slaving over the stove. No set plans for NYE. Not seeing MIL.

We’ve had a lovely time this year. I guess something that can’t be replicated but first one our 4 year old has fully understood and built up to, eg first letter to Santa and being in a Nativity at nursery. Priceless.

More practically: booking in a Tesco delivery ages in advance for Christmas food; bought the amazing cook! Christmas dinner which my DH made, bought desserts, had all presents bought and wrapped in advance, nice days out as the weather was good and managed to get out for a walk on Christmas Day with a chocolate coin treasure hunt! Also stopped over in a nice B and B on Boxing Day after visiting in laws which fly like a treat.

Just dh and our 2 dcs at home for Christmas. I visited my parents on the morning.
All out shopping was done prior to Christmas Eve so we enjoyed a lovely walk and went out for tea. No retail madness was bliss.

Christmas Dinner on boxing day.
Not hosting anyone except the 4 of us.
No big plans with anyone.
Lots of fresh air with kids and put dog.
Start present shopping in September and be sorted by December.
Cut down on cards to elderly relatives only.
Don't make any plans unless you really want to.
Hope I don't sound miserable. Our Christmas was lovely. Still saw relatives but not for hours on end, a coffee and a mince pie etc. We had the loveliest Christmas. Lots of time with our dd9 and ds13. Went to the cinema, out twice for meals, walks along the beach and across the common. No forced merriment. Perfect.

Watch the Snowman on Christmas Eve and prep all veg. A longish walk on Christmas Morning followed by a large glass of Prosecco. No presents for adults. No expectations. Five minutes of carols by candlelight most evenings in the couple of weeks beforehand because I love them.

I prepped most of the veg on Xmas eve and I cooked the turkey on Xmas eve. Despite having a houseful of visitors for Xmas dinner (more than ever before) I was calm and didn’t worry and just put it all in dishes and let them help themselves. I have never been as laid back, and I enjoyed it so much more than when I am my usual stresshead self. 🤣

For me the most enjoyable part is spending it with people I love rather than those I 'ought' to share it with. IE no fecking family with their aggressive, nasty bollocks. I spent it with my closest friends and their kids. It was pandemonium, we didn't have enough plates and I'm still clearing up the mess. But it was wonderful.

I love Christmas too, no work for ten days and I get to see family I don’t see at any other time of the year. Extended house stays by a big group and everyone pitches in.

Family staying and visiting other family. Helps if you like them and get on though or imagine it would have opposit effect. Quiet time in the evenings running up to Christmas watching Christmas films and programmes etc. Dont try and craft the perfect Xmas. Only ends up stressful.

I had a great time by keeping things simple this year. I declined invitations to some of the kids' parties. They have them for Rainbows, gym, dancing, school, etc. It was non-stop and felt more like a chore than fun. This year, we made time just to be. No expectations, no demands.
I didn't over-plan Christmas day. I made sure we all went outside for some fresh air to stop any bickering. We just went with the flow.

This will sound awful but it was one of the best Christmases despite the death of my MIL last year.
Of course she is missed but I finally felt I got to do it the way DH and I really want i.e simple, relaxed and no pressure. My MIL was quite stubborn and domineering about Christmas and she complicated things by for example, insisting on excessive amounts and variety of home cooking and baking which never got eaten. I could never relax and missed out on quality time with the kids due to feeling I had to help even though it was unnecessary.

It was much more simple this year for us, just one or two relatives over to us on the day itself and Boxing Day, then we just stayed in and chilled until New Year's. It was bliss - pyjamas all day, watching old movies, playing games, DC got on brilliantly, lots of easy to prepare food. (Got a food delivery booked for the 23rd and the 29th so didn't need to battle in the shops.) I can't believe we didn't get stir crazy but it was wonderful to just stop being so busy and just 'be.' I'm so sad we'll be getting back to a normal routine tomorrow!
Seems like simplicity is a common theme on here...

Some great ideas!

I’m glad I won’t be the only person buying my own presents! I may start in January and buy one a month, big or small.

No decorations, no guests, just good food and chilling at home for a week. Best Christmas for 20 years.

Having a month off work, total bliss. Down time to chill and be together.

Being organised - I loosely followed TOMM Christmas, and had all presents bought and most wrapped by start of December.

Booking in online shop as soon as it opened. Happened to pop to supermarket for a couple of bits on Sat 23rd and it was total carnage! Would have exploded trying to do a full big shop I think.

Lots of prep for Christmas lunch if you are cooking. Make and freeze what you can in advance, and in the day or 2 before. We planned to eat at 3pm, and this meant DH, DD, the dog and I could go for a decent walk in the morning after all the presents. It was lovely, and meant I didn’t get cabin fever from being indoors cooking all day.

Spending time with people you actually like. Declined an invitation to go to DHs nan’s on Christmas Day with MIL, DHs aunt and their adult children. It is always very boring, they are very rude, and expect guests to arrive at 11am and leave at 7pm - no deviation. Would put up with this before, but it would be a long, boring day for DD (18months) so politely declined, which didn’t go down too well! Had a much more fun and relaxed time with my parents and our best friends at our house.

Lots of country walks.

Time with all different branches of the family.

Running to keep me sane (and burn off the cheese)

Also buying and wrapping the stockings by early Dec made a huge difference as that's a lot of work and expense.

I agree with eating Christmas lunch later so it’s more relaxed in the morning. We ate at 4pm (MIL insisted on 1pm last year, at my house, I ignored her).

We had a relaxing morning, big breakfast, went out for a walk and to the pub. No cabin fever or afternoon slump!

I gave this a lot of thought a few years ago when I felt that all the joy had been wrung out of Christmas for me.

I realized that magic making isn’t particularly compatible with feeling the magic. I realized that my in-laws were going to be what they were going to be and there was nothing to be gained from stressing about them. I realized that Christmas is a ton of work for me.

I also realized that I still like at least the idea of Christmas and I didn’t want to let that go.

So my answer is to spread it out. I know lots of people deal with it by saying “it’s just one day” but for me, I deal with it by considering it a season.

I get as much of the work done as early as I can so that in December I can enjoy the run up with as little stress as possible. Gifts are bought, wrapped, sorted and hidden. This also spreads the cost (as long as I’m very disciplined) and the pain. I try and put a little bit of cash aside so that I have what I need.

I make an effort to do lots of Christmas things with the dc - mostly a Christmas version of ordinary things (like going for a walk in the woods but looking for holly or pine cones, or doing Christmas baking instead of making scones, watching a Christmas movie together or detouring to spot Christmas lights when we’re driving in the evenings.

I grew up with very little so I know how to make do and I’m a bit uncomfortable with excess (I can easily spin this into being environmentally conscious, but it’s mostly rooted in my childhood issues) so I have a weird contrast of expensive glass tree baubles and home made paper decorations.

We had a North Pole breakfast this year using an elasticated bedsheet as a tablecloth, paper snowflakes and paper snowmen tied to the glasses with scarves of red ribbon that cost €1 in Tiger. It looked gorgeous and was a bit of fun.

We made our own crackers for dinner too out of the craft paper rolls inside gift wrap. Decorated with oranges and pine and jute string they looked lovely. If diy isn’t your thing, you can pick up crackers now for next Christmas for very little.

People have often told me that I put in unecessary effort but the thing is I put in the efforts that I enjoy. And I make an effort to enjoy lots of small things even if it’s only for a few moments at a time.

Being absolutely honest, Christmas Day isn’t great but because it’s only a part of the Christmas season, that doesn’t bother me as much any more.

I secretly celebrate other days, quietly, without making it obvious. I love the solstice. Some years we’ve roasted chestnuts or marshmallows on the fire pit, some years I’ve watched the sunrise or sunset, some years I’ve just quietly lit a candle.

I give the dc a small treat on the 5th and have a glass of Baileys or wine to toast La Befana. When I get the packing away finished on the 6th I have an easy evening with a takeaway dinner to celebrate Nollaig na mBan. They’re just daft little things really but because I don’t talk about them, no one can really ruin them either. And because my Christmas isn’t all about Christmas Day, dramas and tantrums on that day aren’t such a big deal either.

For perhaps 15 years we've had my parents here for Christmas dinner and it's always been quite regimented. They need collecting just before dinner and then taking back home in time for Strictly or whatever it is that they like to watch so that meant no alcohol with dinner. They usually eat early so I'd always be racing to get the dinner ready for 1 at the very latest (which is late for them, I'd usually get a call at around 11 asking what time it'd be ready because my Dad was hungry) and then the afternoon would be spent quietly sitting watching TV that they enjoy.

Also, I asked them once and after that they just assumed that we'd be hosting them every year. If they can find themselves a rut then my parents will get stuck in it and drag everyone else into it with them.

Christmas 2017 we had to shake it up a bit as our son was having surgery 10 days before Christmas and we didn't know if he'd be feeling up to celebrating or if we'd need to delay our Christmas Day until he was well, so I explained this to my parents and said we'd not be hosting. They made arrangements with my sister instead.
It was liberating.
We ate when dinner was ready, played cards afterwards and had a really good day. I'm not a confident cook so it took so much pressure off me. It worked for us so I didn't ask them this year (even though it seemed that they were expecting to be asked).

It all sounds selfish written down but I've spent far too many Christmas mornings stressing in the kitchen and missing out on playing with my children when they were young.

It’s not selfish Madison it sounds lovely and liberating and you get to enjoy it with your children.

I’m building up to doing the same next year. In laws just assume they will come to ours EVERY year. They don’t ask our plans they just sit and wait until we feel bad and ask them. They insist on coming round earlier than I say and demand lunch is cooked by 1. I got told off last year as I was cooking and not sitting watching every single present being opened.

I think we all need to reclaim our Christmas Days!