How did becoming a parent change you?

[IStillMissBlockbuster]

I've been told that motherhood changes you profoundly, did it? How?

I love someone more than I love myself and would literally die for that one person. It's quite an over whelming feeling

The little changes :

1- im now fine with eating a lukewarm meal. Pre parenthood I could only eat my meals hot and as soon as they were served, now they are usually tepid after repeat child requests.
2 - im happy to go swimming with hairy legs/pits because actually id much rather swim with my kids than say no or make them wait while I sort my legs. Pre kids Id never ever dare.
3 - I no longer feel guilty for lazing around on an evening. I work damn effing hard for that. I mever used to pre kids.

Big changes :

1 - im now a do er. I can simultaneously cook a meal, iron a set of uniform, oversee dc doing homework and a load of laundry. If im away without the kids I have all of this excess energy that isnt being spent doing.
2 - Ive lost the ability to lose myself in a book. I am gutted about this and hope it returns as the kids grow.
3 - ive become way less judgemental. Pre kids I was the perfect parent . I also had stupid blinkered opinions on stuff without seeing the bigger picture. Part of this may just be ageing too, but I am definetly way less judgy and just think "get through it best you can".

I'm not me any more and I don't like who I have to be now
I love my girls I do but my heath mental and physical will never get back to what it was

I’m with Fission — not really at all. I was briefly miserable and isolated during maternity leave, but that was a temporary aberration. I like my life now, but I liked it a lot before I had DS, too. Work hasn’t become any less important, and while I adore DS, who is fabulous, my life doesn’t solely revolve around him. Relations with parents and ILs are probably eased by being mediated through a small child everyone loves, and with DH are triangulated via another member of ‘us’.

Possibly makes a difference that I was almost 40 before I had DS — by choice — so I had a strong sense of who I was, and a lot going on in my life.

I am more me now. Maybe i was raised to be selfish but if i’m not firing on all cylinders then nobody is happy. I have realised that this show is nothing without me so i need to be cared for too. I really wish other mums would realise this too.

Changed me completely. I value things so much more. I am less anxious about stupid things as I now have real things to worry about. I have purpose. I judge people less. My heart feels full. I take better care of myself because I am someone's mum. I feel guilty all the time about everything. Sometimes I feel so miserable and sometimes I feel like the happiest person alive. I am less superficial. I have a better understanding of myself. It's the hardest thing I have ever done but the best even if it doesn't always feel like it.

Please note: I am writing this on a good day If I wrote this on a bad day my answers might be completely different