Gratitude - can’t make sense of my opinions, looking for more thoughts!

[Serendipper]

I’ve read lots of posts on Facebook about feeling unhappy with presents or feeling upset that others weren’t grateful for your presents and seem to agree with both sides each time.

Should you always be grateful anytime someone buys you something? Should you always keep/use/dress your kids in something because it was bought for you?

I really struggle with waste (money/effort/enviromental) so when I’m given a gift that I won’t use (this years was an expensive piece of tech - when I already have and don’t use a cheaper version) I’m all confused about wether I should be grateful and try to use it or if I’m allowed to be disappointed because I actually really need the money instead of the item and the giver knows I don’t use the one they know I bought earlier in the year.

Must you still be grateful if a present is genuinely thoughtless and a bit rubbish, just because it was given?

The way I think about it is to separate my feelings about the object and the person. I’m grateful for the person, for them being in my life, for what they have brought into my life, for caring enough to send a gift.

I rarely get gifts I actually like. But I would never say or show this. Gracious acceptance and gratitude is my rule of thumb,

A lot goes straight to the charity shop. I wear mil’s jumpers and scarves a couple of times when I visit then I move them on to the charity shop. Occasionally I regift if it’s really suitable for someone else.

I don’t feel any obligation to things