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Original poster

Is this a rubbish gift?

56 replies

Springtimeflowers · 25/12/2018 22:47

I have a young family, and have tried to gift to others fairly minimally but thoughtfully this year. Like many people, we are on a budget and don't like worrying about money over Christmas.

We don't live near parents (and I know my parents wish they could see their grandchildren more), so I thought it would be nice to make scrapbooks (filled with nice photos and my toddlers' artwork) for my parents and in laws. They took a long time to make, and I thought that they would make a really special gift.

But I called my mum, and I feel like she was really disappointed by the gift. She didn't say, but I know her well enough. I just feel a bit sad, and nervous to give the present to my in laws when we see them soon.

Would you think this gift wasn't very nice?

OP posts:
KimchiLaLa · 25/12/2018 22:51

It's a lovely gift but I probably wouldn't have done it in addition to a more "material" one. I know that's not ideal but some people just like getting gifts on Xmas day!!

Veterinari · 25/12/2018 22:52

I think that’s lovely OP! As an adult I have enough ‘stuff’
Something like the scrapbook is more meaningful

whiteworld · 25/12/2018 22:55

I’d love a gift like that. Yanbu. And your mum should like it, especially if she wants to see more of the gc!

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Skang · 25/12/2018 22:56

Do you not share photos all the time though? And I'm not convinced many people really enjoy receiving toddler art work. Sorry! I think its a bit of a non gift x

Original poster
Springtimeflowers · 25/12/2018 22:59

Thank you - I was just a little surprised that she didn't seem as pleased as I thought she'd be.

I normally would buy something else, but with two children now money is tight so thought that would be enough. We also have a big family, so know she'll get plenty of 'proper' gifts.

I just hope my in laws like it!

OP posts:
Original poster
Springtimeflowers · 25/12/2018 23:01

They don't actually see lots of photos as I don't have social media. I do share some to my mum (my dad doesn't really use any technology), but purposely included lots of photos I know they haven't seen before.

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Owlettele · 25/12/2018 23:02

Could it be that the disappointment you heard was more sadness? Perhaps it reminded her she would love to see your lil one more?! - I think it sounds Like a lovely gift and when I was just an Auntie (before mum) I would have loved this filled with nieces bits!

Seniorschoolmum · 25/12/2018 23:02

I think it’s lovely. Don’t be nervous.

I put together a photo book of my niece’s wedding photos because she didn’t have an official photographer. Then my sister asked me to make one featuring the flower girls & page boys - ie her grand children. It’s one of her favourite things. She’s got past material stuff.

Flower777 · 25/12/2018 23:02

I would have liked this OP. Sounds delightful!

Original poster
Springtimeflowers · 25/12/2018 23:05

Owlettele ah, I hadn't thought of that. She has expressed several times that she's disappointed she's not seen us this Christmas (I miss them too).

OP posts:
ComtesseDeSpair · 25/12/2018 23:06

I think that scrapbooking, unless somebody also scrapbooks themselves, is one of those crafts which a lot of people underestimate in terms of time or effort. You know it took ages and lots of thought to curate the contents; your mum possibly thought it just a last-minute rush-job made up of random kiddie things you had lying around because you hadn’t managed to get her anything else, and was disappointed at that thought?

Original poster
Springtimeflowers · 25/12/2018 23:09

Comtesse yeah that could be true! I mean, I know how many hours it took to put together, but maybe she thinks it was made last minute.

OP posts:
BackforGood · 25/12/2018 23:13

I'm inclined to agree with Comtesse

Obviously, I'd say nice things and make all the right noises, but I wouldn't really want a scrap book full of "artwork". Now, a nice calendar made of Grandchildren's photos would be nice, but a load of "artwork", less so.

However, you know your Mum and your MiL - maybe they would.

Reaa · 25/12/2018 23:16

Springtimeflowers
My first thought was not that she did not like it, but that it has made her, miss you all more than ever right now.

Original poster
Springtimeflowers · 25/12/2018 23:17

Yeah, I guess I've missed the mark perhaps. I did about 40 photos and 40 artwork (one on each page - so the pages wouldn't stick together, as I couldn't really buy that many page protectors). It's just hard when not having much money to spend!

OP posts:
ErrolTheDragon · 25/12/2018 23:17

I can't think of anything my parents would have liked more, and probably the same goes for the in-laws.

AnchorDownDeepBreath · 25/12/2018 23:19

I would have added it to a "conventional" present too if I'm honest - I appreciate money is tight but I think people underestimate handmade gifts and I don't think many people would value a scrapbook unless they've made one themselves...

I hope your in-laws like their gift, though; and that you've all had a lovely day Thanks

Original poster
Springtimeflowers · 25/12/2018 23:19

I won't let myself dwell on it any more, as I know I can overthink things like this for a long time! It was made with love, and there's not much I can do now anyway.

Thank you everyone!

OP posts:
giftsonthebrain · 25/12/2018 23:22

Although toddler artwork is cute, photos of the toddler would be nicer and more fun to share with other grandparents.

Original poster
Springtimeflowers · 25/12/2018 23:23

gifts there were photos, about 40 I think.

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PinkFizzz · 25/12/2018 23:24

I would love a gift like this OP. It is not crap at all! Of course it's lovely to receive gifts that are more luxurious or expensive than something you'd buy for yourself, but something like this requires alot of thought and care.

One of my favourite gifts from DP is a £4 set of two cheap beaded bracelets, not at all valuable but I know where the thought came from behind them. I would love a gift like this featuring my son or nephew/niece.

Maybe Owelette is right and it's not the goft that was disappointing but a bit of sadness that she doesnt see you all more. I cant imagine anyone not appreciating something as lovely as this.

giftsonthebrain · 25/12/2018 23:24

Photos of you and your toddler or photos of the artwork?

SundayGirl86 · 25/12/2018 23:24

I think it’s a thoughtful gift and something to treasure over the years. It’s not some random toddlers’ photos and artwork either - it’s their grandchildren’s so presumably meaningful to them. I wouldn’t worry OP, Christmas really shouldn’t be about giving expensive gifts for the sake of it and I bet your parents wouldn’t want you in debt because you’d spent what you couldn’t afford.

AWishForWingsThatWork · 25/12/2018 23:25

TBH, I can see why it might be disappointing. I have 3 children ... and I already share pictures of them with my family pretty regularly. As for artwork, I don't keep their artwork, myself! 99% of it is just not worth holding on to, so I can't imagine grandparents wanting to do so!

Original poster
Springtimeflowers · 25/12/2018 23:26

Oh no, not photos of the artwork! Photos of the grandchildren, some with family, some with us etc. Also artwork stuck in as well as done directly into the scrapbook.

OP posts: