Potty training dilemma! Please help.

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Hi, I’m after some advice. My son who is 3 1/2 now and we have been potty training since the beginning of July.
He has always been amazing with his wees and got them straight away with very few accidents. Number 2’s however are still a nightmare, at first he was super constipated as he wasn’t going at at all, that surpassed and we thought we’d broken through as he started to do poos on the toilet. However now we have taken a total step back over the last month or so and he just does them in his pants! He refuses to go the toilet when we tell him and all hell breaks loose if we take him. I don’t want to make it a horrific experiance for him but we’ve got to draw the line somewhere. He’d just prefer to poop in his pants and I don’t know what to do?! We ask him why and he just says ‘I don’t know’ 😫
Can anyone give me any advice or amazing tips if there own.
Thank you, from a mum in a crisis xx

I don’t know sorry, but in solidarity my 3.3 yr old was doing this until 4 weeks ago and I was tearing my hair out. One day she just decided not to and it’s been four weeks without accidents. She was freely wetting and soiling herself and not caring then just made up her contrary mind.

Sorry, OP, I have no advice for you. But DS won't use his potty/toilet seat for Number 2's ever!

We hit a real low on the weekend when I loudly said that he'd rather poop on the floor

Mine was similar. Would wee fine. Poo though another matter. When questioned stated that they liked the warm feeling... Then one day just started using the toilet ...

Morning everyone, thank you for your comments. It’s just calming to know that I’m not the only one going through it. I’m hoping he just, gets it soon 😊

AT that age, I’d make clearing up his problem too, get him to undress himself, clean himself up and empty contents of pants into toilet.
Keep reiterating how poos go in the toilet, mummy and daddy do poos in the toilet etc
Might be an idea to buy some special pants if you haven’t already, maybe favourite character on, then make comments on how Thomas/paw patrol/whoever doesn’t want to be covered in poo.
Have you got any friends with children who are around the same age and use the toilet? Might help having them over to play and your dc may be inclined to follow by example because the other child is pooing on the toilet.
Lastly, make sure he is drinking plenty throughout the day so doesn’t have a chance to get constipated and make his poo hurt or hard to push out, I think at this time of the year especially we tend to think we don’t need as much in the summer as it’s colder but with heating on it’s easy to become dehydrated if not drinking enough. My 2.6yr old drinks approx 6 or more tall Tommie tippee cups per day for example(of very dilute squash as hardly drinks anything when given water)

Try reading him Poo Goes to Pooland, which is an NHS resource. You can also download an App for a short animated video

Thank you for your advice.
We will definitely try the whole making it his problem to clean up too, that might make him think twice. We have ‘special’ paw patrol pants for him but we will reinforce the fact that they don’t want to be covered in poo and see if it helps 😫
He does drink plenty of juice and is definitely no longer constipated at all, he just chooses to go in his pants than the toilet.
It’s just so hard to not get frustrated and angry when it’s constantly in his pants and not on the loo, even though we ask him, what feels like every two minutes if he needs a poo and his answer if ‘no’ and then seconds later he tells us he needs one but what he means is he’s done one already in his pants 🙈
All threads/posts say to keep calm and not tell them off but surely there has to be a point where they need to know it’s wrong 🤷🏼‍♀️Thanks for your advice, I will be taking it all onboard and trying it xxx

Thank you, I will have a look at the video xxx