Putting baby in their own room

[TC07]

DS is 4.5 months and I was adamant I would not put him in his own room until he was 6 months.

But; I'm fucking knackered. I don't think it's a coincidence that he wakes up when me and DH happen to wake up and I'm starting to need my sleep. His own room is next door and in fact there will only be a wall between his current bed and his intended bed.

How do you know when a baby is ready for their own room? Is he too little to sleep alone?

Yes, look at risk of sids on lullaby trust website.

If you absolutely must move him into his own room, then at least use a breathing monitor mat thing.

We had the same set up and put baby in his own room at 3 months, and all slept SO much better! Kept both doors open initially, but now close them (he’s 11mo). You’ll get aggressive replies here abou my why you think you know better than the professionals, but in the end of the day, they’re guidelines - not laws. Give it a go, you can always move him back in if it doesn’t work.

*about why.

But yes, do look at the SIDS risk, don’t use cot bumpers, don’t give baby bedding etc.

We moved our now toddler at 3 months. I felt the same that I wanted to have her sleeping in the same room for 6 months but we kept waking each other up constantly. I done loads of research on best practices and safety. The monitor was in the cot with her and turned up to max so I could hear her snoring away. It worked out really well for us and we all slept a lot better since then. Do what's right for your family

My first 2 went in at 4 and 3 months as we were waking each other.
No,3 and no more space meant she shared with me until 9 months. First night in her own room last night and the first night she has ever slept through!

I moved my eldest at 11 weeks old.

I didn't move the youngest until about 10/11 months. I probably would've done it sooner, but he was going in with his brother and I was worried they would wake each other up.

We moved our first son at about 4 months because his massive cot was next to the radiator in our room and we couldn’t put the radioator on and it was December. Our youngest stayed in with us for 6 months.

You can only make a decision for you. Weigh up the stats and other risk factors for SIDS that apply to you and minimise these as much as possible. I think we all have different comfort with risk.

“then at least use a breathing monitor mat thing” - is there any evidence they protect against SIDS?

My brother died of SIDS so I want to make doubly sure we are doing the right thing.

Personally I'm ok with waking in the night as I do constantly to check DS is breathing and DS Just sleeps when he wants so any disturbed nights he can catch up on seep but it's the times he wakes and can't be settled back to sleep which frustrate me and makes me think if we didn't wake him in the first place this wouldn't happen.

Another thing is our guest room is DS "room" (AKA dumping ground with a double bed and nursery furniture) and we are having guests over Christmas and New Years so maybe we should wait until January but then we will be moving house so would this be another disturbance? If we waited until we moved DS could be sitting and rolling by the time the sale goes through and the crib we have isn't suitable for sitting babies apparently.

It's a bloody Mind field!!

Not much point moving baby into their own room only to have to move them out for guests.

Why isn’t your crib suitable? Is it a next to me style crib rather than cot?
If you need a good bit inexpensive cot, I recommend the Ikea Sundvik www.ikea.com/gb/en/products/childrens-ikea-products/baby/cots/sundvik-cot-white-art-90385550/

Why do people shut both doors with baby? Ie baby's door shut and adults door shut?
We have doors open here I thought even for oxygen flow it's more Healthy?

Paintbysticker no idea if there's evidence those mats protect against sids but they use them in hospital.

The point of having them in your own room is that your breathing helps baby regulate their breathing.

There's a sleep regression around 4 months so that could be impacting too. If you need the other room over Christmas, I'd definitely stay put.

Personally I'd keep them put for another couple of months, as per the guidelines. I totally see where you're coming from as we had similar issues with my LO sometimes waking when we turned over in the night (we have a creaky bed!), which is a pain. But I weighed it up and decided the guidelines were there for a reason and I'd rather have peace of mind and get slightly less sleep for another couple of months. In the end we had our little one in with us until he was almost 9 months, largely just down to not getting round to moving him. It did feel like he was totally ready for it by then though.

It's to help them regulate their breathing, which you can't do from another room no matter what monitors etc you have in place. Obviously tonnes of people do this and it's absolutely fine so it's about weighing up the risks and deciding on what you're comfortable with. For me though I can be quite nervous so used the guidelines as a deciding factor. You can never eliminate all risks but you can minimise them. A small risk is still a risk IMO

I can’t imagine being able to sleep with DD in a different room, I would worry myself in to a complete state. Why do you and DH wake him up?

We shut the doors so we don’t disturb each other- well, I say shut, they’re pushed to all the way but not closed with a handle. Baby makes it very clear when he wants feeding(!) so it’s worked well.

Like literally everything in parenting (and life!) there’s a risk associated with whatever you choose. With Christmas and NY coming up, and family experience of bad consequences (OP, I’m sorry for your loss) I’d probably wait til January. However, as baby got older he got more aware and more difficult to settle n new locations, so I wouldn’t leave it too long either, personally!

@MimiSunshine yes it's a next to me style which says you shouldn't use once a baby can sit up. He has a cot in his room ready for him but it won't fit in our bedroom.

I think I will leave him where he is for now. Thanks everyone

When he is at least 6 months. The waking him up is very probably what is preventing SIDS.

If space is an issue with cot, we used a travel cot when dd outgrew her crib.