Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Flip

Original poster

I have the hangover 'fear'

18 replies

gunge · 16/12/2018 14:57

Xmas night out last night. Was all going fine until near the end when I went on a bit of a downer and started moaning to someone that I was rubbish, didn't belong here etc.
I was feeling a bit on the edge of things, like I didn't quite fit in but up to that point I'd been happy drunk and fine.
I don't remember exactly but I think someone got annoyed and told me to be more confident.
I went home soon after so thankfully avoided further embarrassment.
It's not like me to go on a downer but it's been a tough time recently.
I'm so embarrassed and annoyed at myself as I feel exposed and didn't want people to see my vulnerability.
Perhaps it's just the hangover but it's making me anxious and sad.

OP posts:

ScreamingValenta · 16/12/2018 15:01

It is just the hangover fear - from what you say you have done nothing terrible. Having a drunken moan is very commonplace and others will have been drunk too. I doubt anyone will remember your moan for very long, if at all.

Bubbagump1991 · 16/12/2018 15:06

I had this last Saturday. Please don’t worry. I went into work Monday to find out people had been alottttttt worse than me. Even managers being sick outside! It could be worse. People probably don’t even remember

BlueBrush · 16/12/2018 15:08

It's just the Fear talking. Don't listen to the Fear! It will lie to you! I'm sure no-one will think anything of it. Get a cup if tea and a biscuit and watch something stupid and Christmassy on TV, and forget about last night.

Original poster

gunge · 16/12/2018 15:15

Thanks 🙂
At least I didn't be sick, flash, shag someone I shouldn't!
Went home to my lovely DH who stayed up and helped put me to bed then made me a cooked breakfast this am

OP posts:

LadyMarmyLard · 16/12/2018 15:17

Oh is that all? You had a moan? God don't worry about that, plenty worse going down at these Xmas parties.
Anyway the person that got 'annoyed' is probably also at home with the fear thinking they were unreasonably annoyed with you.

Trust me, you're fine.

KitNCaboodle · 16/12/2018 15:21

Hangxiety is horrible. You did nothing wrong. Don’t listen to your gremlins.

Maryberryjam · 16/12/2018 15:43

Dont worry , everyone else was probably just as drunk as you were . The fear is shit .

Laiste · 16/12/2018 15:43

It took me a good few years to realise that if i was feeling a bit on the down/depressed/angry side when i started drinking there was a 50/50 risk of the alcohol making me feel much worse. Spiraling miserably into your glass is a horrible feeling and it was usually accompanied by anxiety the next day.

Check your mood before you start drinking. My tip :)

Original poster

gunge · 16/12/2018 15:43

The lady who told me off for moaning, I'm not sure about really. She outwardly seems very nice but there's an edge to her.
I am going to work on my confidence next year though.

OP posts:

colditz · 16/12/2018 15:44

It's just hangxiety, have some toast and jam, and a nap on the sofa

Original poster

gunge · 16/12/2018 15:45

You're right Laiste
Normally I'm happy drunk and to be fair I was 95 percent of last night. But my mood has been up and down recently due to a stressful patch. I should have drank less or not at all.

OP posts:

AdelaideK · 16/12/2018 15:51

Beer fear is awful and puts me off drinking.

I bet loads happened after you'd gone home that people will be cringing at. Your moan won't even have registered

PaintBySticker · 16/12/2018 15:59

It’s the fear. I cried at my work Christmas drinks this week (we’re going through an organisational change with redundancies looming). Yes it’s a bit embarrassing but there are worse things. I didn’t cause any harm to anyone, just a few tears. I promise you’ll feel better once you’ve recovered from the hangover.

Original poster

gunge · 16/12/2018 16:02

I went home at midnight. Others kept going until the early hours. They are all saying what a great night it was but surely someone did something more embarrassing than me after I left?!

OP posts:

DaphneFanshaw · 16/12/2018 16:04

Ah, maybe the woman who moaned at you is worrying about being a bit snappy with you.
If you left before everyone else the chances are that they carried on drinking and it wall all be a blur anyway.

CakeNinja · 16/12/2018 17:27

Ahh if you left early there will have been far worse than a bit of letting off steam going on.
Although it’s beerfear so not entirely rational thinking!
I do drive to my Christmas do with the work lot for this reason, I love a good drink but then become a bit crazy and I prefer to keep that to my close circle of friends
works do, I drive, show my face, chat to people and then drive home again.

Easy to say but try not to dwell too hard, venting is hardly the most outrageous behaviour. I bet no one else has even thought twice about it today.

Chewbecca · 16/12/2018 17:28

What were you drinking?
I think gin does this to me.

Blueskywhy · 16/12/2018 17:33

I used to like drinking (1/2 bottle wine on Fri & Sat evening, sometimes go out with friends or work events), but sometime during my 30s afterwards I started occasionally feeling what I'd now call Hangxiety ... so for me it is a real feeling. I never seemed to have that during my teens or 20s. I wonder why? As a result I very seldom drink now, and feel so much better for it.

Flip