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Original poster

Benefits of a December birthday?

54 replies

Biancadelriosback · 15/12/2018 18:08

It's DS's birthday today (2) and out of the 10 people invited to his party, 5 didn't come. Excuses range from lack of money to need to go Xmas shopping. He obviously didn't know the difference but I'm sad for him and worried about a lifetime of crap birthdays. Can I ask you to tell me the benefits of a December birthday?

OP posts:
WhirlwindHugs · 15/12/2018 19:59

Everything is beautiful, we told our DC when they were very small look all the lights are for your birthday!

We actually find all the family are much more likely to all be able to get together as people have time booked off work.

For a party with his friends, I recommend doing it earlier in December.

Esker · 15/12/2018 20:14

My son is the 27th. He's still small (will be two this year) so not old enough to understand. I was thinking that maybe as he gets older instead of trying to fight against Christmas that we could sort of 'lean in' (excuse naff phrasing) to it and let him have a fun Christmas party in early/ mid December, and then onhis actual birthday, when people are skint/ away visiting relatives, we could do a treat of his choice.

HotChocolateWeather · 15/12/2018 20:44

You find out who actually gives a shit.

Most people forget, ignore, decline party invites or get a "joint" gift which appears to be of the exact same size/value as the Christmas gifts your siblings got...

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Events & celebrations
Odiepants · 15/12/2018 21:18

DS is 23rd Dec but we did his party today with school friends. We then do a family celebration on the actual day. When he was younger we tried having a party after Christmas but it felt too disconnected from his actual birthday whereas before works better.

We play up all the special things he can only do/have by his birthday being at Christmas and we always see family because of when it is.

cherry2727 · 15/12/2018 22:41

No experience here op but will find out soon enough ! My ds2 birthday is the first week of January and we are planning his first birthday party for him. I sent out invites in November and so far I've had more declines than acceptances and replies. I'm still waiting on 40% of invitees to respond ! It sucks as I am unable to confirm numbers for food catering , party bags and furniture hire etc . Dh and I were discussing taking him to Disney land instead and I regret not going with this option now as I don't think that a lot of people are able to attend .

I really don't get what money has to do with it as the party and everything in it is free and surely a present for a 2 year old can cost as little as £1! I'm not even bothered about presents ! It's such a shame when people use lack of funds as an excuse! Also , kids parties are normally only scheduled for 2-3 hours at most so surely other activities can be scheduled around if ?!

My dh has suggested that we celebrate it during summer but I don't think that I can be bothered. I'll prob just take him somewhere nice like the zoo, Lego land etc and have tea party at home with close family going forward. Hope your party goes well Op xxx

MrsAmaretto · 15/12/2018 22:52

My sister’s is the 28th. She hates it. Like your child she’s always experienced people letting her down with “Xmas excuses”. She’s going to do her 40th in the summer instead.

She actually repeatedly told me that if I conceived a December baby she’d never forgive me! Mine are all the summer :)

I’d recommend planning very special birthday treat with just a couple of friends you can rely on.

secretuser · 15/12/2018 22:53

It could be worse, my poor nephew is 1st January. He's 11 and has his parties on the 2nd because people are often doing family things on New Year's Day.

It's going to either be brilliant or rubbish when he's older and can go out drinking - everyone will be out to 'see in' his birthday but not 'for' his birthday, and NYE is often such a let down anyway. All his mates will be hungover on his birthday probably.

My FIL is 28th December. Not sure what it was like for him as a child but he now likes it because SiL who lives away is always home for Christmas and stays the few extra days, so the whole family are together on his birthday.

Veronicat · 15/12/2018 22:55

Mine is tomorrow. I'm planning on defrosting the freezer as no-one is around due to Christmas stuff.

vgiraffe · 15/12/2018 22:57

I love Christmas so December birthday is good as I can have mince pies and mulled wine and enjoy the decorations!

As a child, birthday near the end of term was fun as often there's fun stuff going on at school (and usually no exams like in summer) and everyone was in a good mood.

ChristmasWrappingTheWaitresses · 15/12/2018 22:57

My birthday is the 8th of December and it's far enough away really to be ok and separate. However you do get a lot of people not managing to make out for your birthday as they have work dos and I've also had parties snowed off.

babysharkah · 15/12/2018 23:10

Mine are middle of August, we just do the party / birthday at end of September.

ravenlover · 15/12/2018 23:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

CurbsideProphet · 15/12/2018 23:31

DP and I both have our birthdays in the first half of December. His friends are much better than mine at arranging his birthday get together. I love decorating the tree on my birthday and everyone is generally quite cheery / fairy lights are everywhere etc.

We both make a big effort for the other's birthday and still make it special Smile

When I was a child people would be a bit shit and get me joint Christmas and birthday presents, or just give me a selection box in Christmas paper. My parents made a big effort and used to get me an Easter present instead of egg, so I didn't just open presents in DecemberSmile

Thesearmsofmine · 15/12/2018 23:38

MIne is at the end of this week. It was a bit rubbish as a child as schools broke up and people were going away for Christmas when I had a party. As a teen/early 20’s I had some amazing birthday nights out, everyone is so happy at this time of year and payday is also just before Christmas!

As an adult it’s not that great, we never do anything for my birthday as after sorting everyone’s Christmas presents out we are usually broke!

Chinks123 · 15/12/2018 23:46

With a birthday literally days before Christmas my first answer was there is nothing good about it. As a kid no one could come to my parties as their parents were too busy, as an adult everyone’s skint. I always got one present labelled “Merry xmas and happy birthday” and I had to wait a whole year until I got big presents again.

But it’s quite nice to have a birthday at such a magical time of year, everything looks pretty. As soon as the days over I’ve got Christmas coming.
ooh and school was always closed on my birthday, that was a plus! And the odd year it snowed I suppose. I still hate my December birthday

HippoLatte · 16/12/2018 01:21

My sons is the 24th Dec and one year I booked a venue which I had to pay £15 for each kid up front and no refunds so I wrote on the invite something about needing to know for sure etc and 12 replied they would definitely be there. His party was held around the 20th (few years ago now so can't be exact) and it was snowing which was a nightmare. Ended up just my 2 kids, their cousin and 1 other person. I could have cried, not because of the money but because I knew he noticed. He has ASD so didn't have many friends but usually parties were a time when most kids from school would go if they got invited. It was the last party I booked for him as I couldn't put him or me through it again.

HippoLatte · 16/12/2018 01:24

Oh shit sorry, you wanted benefits!! Sorry too much wine.

Ermmm......now that he's older he asks for money and then Xmas a lot of relatives give money too and he LOVES having lots of money to do whatever he wants with (buy xbox games). Apart from that, there's not a lot of benefits.

I'm also a December birthday so usually end up with 'can't go out, it's too close to xmas' when I try to plan anything. But I do use my birthday/xmas to refill things I don't want to buy for myself through the year (good make up, nice boots etc)

Largepiecesofcrookedwood · 16/12/2018 01:44

DH and I have had a little windfall recently and I've noticed that my birthday (yesterday) was far more luxurious than it has ever been!
I've never really noticed before but my presents were more on a par with everyone elses this year- after 40 years this was a bit of an eye opener! On the plus side I've often managed to swing better gifts by suggesting we wait till the new year when we have more money. Sadly that doesn't cut it for a toddler!
Also, as an adult it's impossible to go out for a quiet meal anywhere (my birthday meal yesterday was punctuated with a conga line) Generally I enjoy this and like to imagine they're all there celebrating my birthday but I suppose I don't know any different Grin

adaline · 16/12/2018 06:56

Sorry OP but I have a December birthday and I hated it as a child. "Joint" presents which were the same presents that everyone else got just for Christmas, nobody being able to come to my party as they were busy with Christmas stuff.

It's not much better as an adult tbh. Going out means avoiding Christmas menus and it's really hard to find a date where everyone is free to celebrate as well.

FairyPenguin · 16/12/2018 07:23

My DS’s birthday is in December. I book his party early (usually in Oct half-term), pick a couple of dates then ask the parents which works best for them all. Not had a problem so far, in fact I think it’s a good chance for parents to go Christmas shopping while their DC are busy! Obviously not when he was 2, but from 5th birthday onwards that’ll work.

IceRebel · 16/12/2018 07:24

I think a December birthday can be fun if very early in the month, say anything before the 5th. However, like other posters I think anything after this gets swallowed up by Christmas.

You get joint presents
Can't book meals out
Christmas wrapping paper
Weather is miserable
People are too busy to come out / to parties
Those who do come are watching their money

It sucks as you don't really feel special, your birthday is almost an afterthought. Sad

The only option is to move to Australia, and have birthday BBQs on the beach. Grin
I can see

allypally32 · 16/12/2018 07:29

It is the perfect reason to have a family party just before Christmas, there is always lots of great party food available in the shops.
My DD is always off school and loves to go ice skating for her birthday.

Grasslands123 · 16/12/2018 07:33

I’m the 19th. Loved it as a child. My mum always use to hold my party on the Saturday before Christmas. Always use to be drop and run. Everyone came as their parents use to drop them off and go finish Christmas shopping - this was preinternet!

Mummabear2212 · 16/12/2018 07:42

My DS was born (2 weeks late) on 22nd last year. I was so worried for all of the above but we planned his birthday party well in advance (booked and sent date in June) and we had it 24/11. He opened his presents from the party then with just a small party present from us. On the 22nd we're going to the zoo, no Christmas jumpers, no trips to see FC just a day for him and he will get ours and grandparent presents then as well as a party tea and cake. We're going to keep doing it this way until he's big enough to either say no parties but a big day out/weekend away or choose his own date. So far not even a sniff of a joint present or wrong wrapping paper but I think that comes down to family more than anything.

Original poster
Biancadelriosback · 16/12/2018 07:55

Oh :(

DS shares a December birthday with another relative so the family are quite well practiced in December birthdays. No Xmas paper, no Xmas activities until after bday, no joint presents etc so I'm hoping we can continue this. All friends so far have been very good at this too. I'll just worry once he's at school I suppose

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