Do I buy my Dad a present?

[itscalledwineflu]

I have a strained relationship with my dad I'm currently not speaking to him for nearly a year without drip feeding it's a long time coming he said some very nasty things to me ( not for the first time ) that he won't apologise for . So anyway even though I don't see much of my dm dad and brothers I always give them Christmas presents. I've bought for dm and brothers but not dad . I was thinking just pass on a gift with the rest of family but it's off my dd and ds not me . What would you do ? I don't want him or my dm thinking I'm coming round which I'm certainly not but I don't want to be nasty and cause any upset at Christmas.

Nope, don't buy for him.

I wouldn't buy for him. Maybe a card from your children but that's all I would do.

I wouldn't, no. He didn't worry about your feelings when he said nasry things and didn't apologise, why should you worry about causing upset now ?

nasty not nasry 🙄

I'd give a general one - Roses or similar. That way if a scene is caused you can say they were for him if you 'need' to. They can take them to share that way and it won't cost too much.

FWIW I'm having a challenging time with mine - he comes to me though as we are a tiny family. I'm dreading it and he's already said he knows it will be "boring" . He usually buys me something like hankies or stuff that looks like it could have come out of a posh cracker and I end up getting him socks and pants like the crappiest gifts you would give a husband, just because you know they need them. I do his washing, so am sadly very aware of the state of his smalls! I have been on the verge of telling him how I feel all week, but as you say it seems like causing upset before the event isn't worth it. I massively resent him for it though. Hard time of year OP - good luck.