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Original poster

Toy guns - yes or no?

33 replies

ClickyJoints · 14/12/2018 18:35

So, I've never allowed toy guns in my house. Because of some weird sense that I'd be an irresponsible parent (maybe because playing with them encourages violence but I'm not actually sure why I'm so adamant about not allowing them as toys).

This year DS (6) has become fixated on weapons. We go to the park - he finds a stick and starts shooting people with it, we're at home and guitars, bits of train track, etc all become pretend guns in his hands. If there are no toys to use he'll just 'shoot' people with his fingers.

So I was thinking about buying him a cheap plastic cowboy gun for Xmas and hoping that having one will make it less illicit and exciting and hopefully after 2 weeks of playing with it he'll get bored and move onto something else. Although there is risk it will fuel is interest but I'm still struggling with the ethics around buying him one.

Do you allow toy guns in your house? If so, what are your reasons (basically help me think it through so I can make my final decision please!)

OP posts:
WhoopiGoldbergsCat · 14/12/2018 18:52

I didn't allow guns when my boys were little but I soon found out they'd make a weapon out of anything, stick, banana roll of wrapping paper!
I gave in and bought them little plastic guns, they're all teens now and haven't turned into mass murderers!
At 6, I think it's fine to have a toy gun. He'll love it (although I'm sure someone will be along soon to say how bad they are!)

BubblesBubblesBubbles · 14/12/2018 18:57

My 5 year old is desperate for a gun! I’ve always been in the no gun camp, no idea why!

This year I’ve got a nurf gun for his stocking Xmas Blush

I suspect me and dh will spend more time shooting each other than the dc will play with it....

Karmin · 14/12/2018 19:00

I don't like them personally.

I respect the soldiers and other armed professionals who carry and use them as part of protecting civilian safety.

I am glad of the gun control, and don't really understand the rulings in places like Russia and the US.

Guns have a purpose, that is to injure or kill another person deemed to be a significant threat to life.

I have 3 boys, yes the older 2 have played with guns like nerf ones, but I don't like it and don't buy it.

I completely understand the psychology of it seeming almost natural, but I am a fun sucker in that I explain exactly what they are pretending, in child-friendly terms. Just as I would if they were throwing stones about.

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Toys
AnguaResurgam · 14/12/2018 19:08

I knew that banning toy guns was completely fruitless when DC bit toast into an 'L' shape and started shooting....

I provided completely OTT silver/neon space guns. Something that as obviously a toy.

And also taught them 'never point a weapon at something unless you mean to destroy it'

DC are teens now and have never been in trouble for aggression.

You may as well work out ways to permit within limits and with discussion of the ethics. Because this sort of thing will come up over and over again - and if you haven't got into the habit when small and hankering for a big shiny cowboy gun or light sabre, it's a heck of a lot harder to deal with a 13yo who wants a shoot'em up computer game,

Dinosauratemydaffodils · 14/12/2018 19:22

I grew up around real guns and had a toy one, didn't make me violent in the slightest. With a df in the military I also knew what they were capable of though.

Out of sensitivity to my MiL (her father was killed during the Troubles, shot at point blank range multiple times) I wasn't going to allow ds to have one. She bought him a plastic AK 47.

He knows what guns can do and isn't allowed to point it at any one. We will probably teach him to shoot at some point too.

cptartapp · 14/12/2018 19:31

I have two boys (now teens) and used to get all het up about them playing with guns. Looking back I don't know why I worried. The benefits of them 'playing' with their friends far outweighed any worries I had. By 11/12 they'd moved onto other things anyway and the guns are long gone.

knittedmouse · 14/12/2018 19:49

I played with silver coloured cowboy guns when I was young and both my dcs have had toy guns. None of us have turned into anything sinister because of this. They turn random household objects and sticks into guns anyway. Ds2 goes to a nerf club and has shot real guns with air cadets.

Sparklingbrook · 14/12/2018 19:52

Nerf Wars is the best fun ever!

JesusInTheCabbageVan · 14/12/2018 19:55

We went the opposite way and let DS have as many guns as he wanted. He got bored of them and has no interest these days.

AndNoneForGretchenWieners · 14/12/2018 20:05

DH didn't want DS to have toy guns. Having been a soldier he didn't want to encourage war games. As soon as he was old enough, he joined army cadets and played with real guns...

OnceInABlueMoon9 · 14/12/2018 20:09

I don’t have boys and my girls haven’t yet shown any interest in guns though they do like swords. I don’t have any problem with toy guns, I think children are very good at distinguishing between real and pretend and it’s just another make believe game for them.

NottonightJosepheen · 14/12/2018 20:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mammmamia · 14/12/2018 20:28

Same here I have never bought one but my DS was given a nerf gun for his birthday and is asking for more foam bullets for Christmas. I could easily get some for his stocking but I can’t bring myself to buy them.

jenthelibrarian · 14/12/2018 20:34

My compromise on this one was a bright red sort of sci-fi weapon that made a kind of space sound-effect noise, rather than a bullet-firing sound.
It may have had a TV or film connection, can't remember now.
In play it could 'freeze' people or turn back time and so on, not just murder them.

bobstersmum · 14/12/2018 20:41

One of my dc is gun mad. He's another one that makes pretend guns, ask he's asked santa for at Christmas is guns, he said, I just love guns mum! He doesn't associate guns with killing or violence, just running around making shooting noises. I don't know what they get out of it.

kazwelch · 14/12/2018 20:48

Both my boys had guns when they were younger & both my turnout fine.

Stompythedinosaur · 14/12/2018 21:00

I don't really like guns, but we don't have the total ban I was subject to as a child. We have a few water guns and the dds have a nerf gun each. They are more interested in bows and arrows and foam swords anyway (which I find far less troubling than guns, although I can't see any logic behind this).

catlovingdoctor · 14/12/2018 21:03

Play takes a variety of forms; it’s the way a child’s brain processes and learns things about their world. It doesn’t mean they’re psychopaths in the making who are going to grow up to go around shooting people. I played with toy guns extensively as a child.

Ivegotthree · 14/12/2018 21:09

Yes

sonlypuppyfat · 14/12/2018 21:12

My DS used to make them out of rolled up newspaper, boys like guns

EndOfAllMyTethers · 14/12/2018 21:22

Nerf Wars is the best fun ever!

^This

DS has been allowed toy guns and is a completely gentle soul. He takes himself off to his bedroom in tears if he accidentally hurts one of his sisters when playing.

Muddlingalongalone · 14/12/2018 21:25

I'm in the no guns camp - so dd1 got £2 to spend in Poundland and chose a massive gun.
I still hate them it freaks me out when she points it at me even though I know it's a toy.
Am tempted to get NERF guns though - they do look fun!

museumum · 14/12/2018 21:32

I have enjoyed target shooting in the past and think it’s great for hand eye coordination and control so I generally only get ds either nerf guns or bows and arrows you can target shoot with and I tell him not to shoot people with them.

errorofjudgement · 14/12/2018 21:35

Another one with 2DS, eventually bought them space guns, after they were using courgettes to “shoot” things in the garden!

DD got her own doll after insisting she take the Thomas train for a walk in her pram!

LadyPasserine · 14/12/2018 21:54

We have a complete armoury. Nerf guns, grenade launchers, bows and arrows, crossbows etc. The best are the automatic ones, Gatling guns. They get issued and then handed back into the armoury at the end of the day, all bullets accounted for.