Is anyone else just not losing their shit over Christmas?

[Undercoverbanana]

Just that really.

No decs - can’t be bothered. Gave up doing cards years ago. Don’t buy crap and plastic tat for people. Refuse to be manipulated by things I don’t want just because they’ve got holly on them.

I’m quite content with life. I’m just jogging along. Everyone else seems to be losing their shit over stuff.

One friend panicking over money. Another friend having family rows about who is visiting who and when. Another couple “have no time at this time of year - so many commitments that we don’t really enjoy”. Christmas work parties - why????? Just don’t go if you don’t want to.

Anyone else opting out?

I do decorations presents and a nice meal. Not fussed what time we sit down to dinner, just when everyone's ready

It's a glorified roast so no worries. I don't go mad buying loads of food as it's pointless, there's only so much you can eat.

I get cards from a few people and send them one in return.

I buy most presents online and start around September. Anything else I need come December won't be much, so it's easier.

Christmas is a nice day, like a glorified Sunday. I like to spend it at home, and in relaxed mode, just DCs & DP. We go visiting on Boxing Day, if we feel like it. Me & DP go out on Boxing night.

That's it really. Family time.

For those who stress about Christmas they must have their reasons but when I read about it I just think, remember what it's all about and don't let it spoil your day.

This thread is a tonic! Last year I was ill so I watched most of the festive season from bed. I realized how unnecessary a lot of it was. I like Christmas but I am trying to do a more old fashioned approach. Some drinks parties with friends here and there. Decorations and tree up next weekend. Less/better presents for the dc. I am not going to run around like a headless chicken.

I’m all for finding ways of destressing and easing the load over Christmas, but no decorations, no visiting family, no presents just sounds like the extreme option and a bit like you hate Christmas (and everyone). Miserable!

I do like Christmas but I really don't recognise the stress personally. We have had loads of stuff at school (nativity plays, carols etc) and I'm on the PTA so have been helping with teas and coffees etc. However, it's not really a big deal to just turn up for an hour (primary school so short concerts). We are going to see Santa and to the theatre and have been to see The Snowman with a live orchestra. We have decorations and buy selective, and usually much loved, presents for a small group of close family members.

What I think is ridiculous is the pressure to be having fun and "living your best life" all the time. Do people really need to be buying new outfits, Christmas bedding, getting a bikini wax for Christmas, buying everyone they've brushed shoulders with presents, or overindulging in food / drink that isn't even lovely food / drink? Most people I've met IRL have a pretty low key but merry Christmas with their kids and/or parents. My mum hosts us all for Christmas dinner - we don't drink alcohol (maybe half a glass of Buck's fizz each) which obviously keeps the costs down but she says her food bill is usually an extra £50 or so for the ten of us - we don't have Christmas breakfast, or starters or dessert though, other than selection boxes! - plus perhaps £50 spread across Christmas week on cheese etc as my brothers and dad are off work. Similarly, I do a buffet on Christmas Eve - nothing fancy, usually a few sandwiches cut into triangles, a smallish cheeseboard and some beige empty calories from Aldi. It's usually £40 or so on top of our usual shop / stuff we have in. Maybe it's because we avoid alcohol / seafood?

However, I do think this is partly because we live a very surburban life: most of our friends, we have known for 15+ years, and most of our friends, and us, live within 10 miles or so of our parents, so there isn't the pressure of hosting visitors for days on end or driving hundreds of miles in December.

We're going away, courtesy of lovely mother-out-law, so I am just mildly stressing about whether DS has enough pairs of pants.

Sounds lovely all this opting out.
I don’t get how yoi can opt out of the million things going on at school though, multiple carol concerts, Christmas jumper day, school Christmas fair, school disco.

You can’t not buy people presents and I want Christmas to be special for my kids and that unfortunately takes some effort?

Delatron i think it's different with young children. When you get the lull between children and grandchildren it's very different. My children are in their 20s now but not partnered up yet so it's just adults having quiet family time.

Can’t say I am losing my shit

I know this year is going to fucking suck big time (my sister died not long ago) my parents are totally disinterested in anything Christmas related (and my dad is having a breakdown) My brother is working his wife is going home as it’s the last time she can fly before their baby is due. So boom my family already half torn apart

It’s going to be me, dh and the dc’s. Quite and as much fun as I can make it given the circumstances.

This year I’ve not done

1. Cards
2. Presents for anyone other than dh and dc
3. All the normal Christmas shit I do (pantos/elf on the shelf/grottos etc)
4. Over spent
5. Engaged in Christmas parties or organised any form of a party!

The kids have barely noticed to be honest which has made me think it’s all a big load of crap anyway!

So far went to bnm and got baubles for less than £6.. I have leafless twig tree which is hassle free will attach photo. Christmas din din is chicken roast for about 6 people i am actually looking forward to doing and isnt too expensive as i don't like turkey. Presents we brought stuff and through being items we need or excitement hasnt made it to the wrapping stage so that is everything done.

Not been stressful or horrible. Minimal stuff ticked off

I'm not bothering at all, my DS decided to leave home by stealth at Easter, he's gone to live with his dad, he's nearly 15 so I'm trying to respect his wishes. I'm not a fan of Christmas so I'm not doing trimmings, I've done an online order of nice food for myself, my DS wants money as a present but I'm also doing a gift bag of things that I would normally buy him all year round, socks, pants, pjs, slippers, toiletries, pens for school, because I'm sure he will be running short of them by now & it won't have occurred to him to buy more. I've hardly any family, just my parents, brother, SIL & nephew & niece so I haven't many cards to get, nephew & niece both get money as I haven't got much idea of what they like. DS & I are spending Christmas day at my parent's & I plan on spending a lot of time in front of the telly or reading.

No cards here either. But I'm getting in touch individually with everyone who sends us one.

Got the decs and the tree up but got half way through the box and decided it was enough. Electric company bloke broke the wreath when he came to read the meter I've just binned it.

We're not in the UK. Going to a ai resort hotel for 2 days over Xmas. Dh and I not doing presents for each other. Hopefully getting the kids in the kids club and then going to the spa.

Kids have a stocking while we are away which is clothes, lego, an activity pack and choc coins.

They have presents at home but only a big cuddly toy for dd, hot wheels set for ds and a board game between them and some new big fluffy dressing gowns.

I don't feel mean at all. I sent my parents a luxury advent calendar and my elderly great aunt a big box of treats for her cat and I'm done!

I think the thing is there are people who do Christmas, the planning, the work, the expense, the hosting etc., and those that just turn up and expect to reap the rewards without any effort or expense. For these people Christmas isn’t hard and they do what they want, party etc and then tell you they are off in the New Year to get away from it all! Merry Christmas to everyone struggling this year!

we just please ourselves and always have done. Helps aswell that cards and decs and bits and pieces are bought in last Christmas sales so not only cheaper but it's ticked off as we go along. Nice and relaxed and low key. We love Christmas dinner in our jammies!

We will have a Christmas dinner with family and a Boxing Day lunch with friends. We will have presents, but there will be no tat - a few treats rather than lots of rubbish!

Putting the (real) tree up today. Also going foraging on our dog walk for stuff to make our own wreath. And dh is planning to make a gingerbread house from scratch with the dc this weekend (sounds a bit ambitious to me!). Goose ordered for Christmas day (dh will cook). Presents bought. Finishing cards today. Christmas does not have to be a tat-filled stress-fest of forced over-indulgence.

I think that my point. It’s easier to sack off Christmas and not be stressed with older children/ no children.

Mine are 8 and 10. Still believe in Santa. So I run around trying to magic everything on their list and we are away for Christmas so I somehow have to get these presents to the holiday home without them seeing!

I’ve cut down on cards. Still have lots of nieces/nephews to buy for.

It just can’t fail to be stressful. I guess unless I started in June but I’m not the type and that still isn’t ‘sacking off Christmas’.

I was really ill last christmas so we had a relaxed christmas we cut back on what we bought present and food wise and took some time to just enjoy a peaceful few days without all the usual nonsense so this year i have done the same
We are going to my mums christmas day for lunch and my inlaws for tea on boxing day but thats all we have planned
My dd is in panto until christmas eve so the only rushing around we will be doing is to take her and pick her up
I am wrapping my presents tonight whilst dd is at my mums for their annual christmas take away and movie night and i'll be doing a normal food shop next weekend

Delatron yes, good point. How do you not go bananas when your children are still at the Santa stage and there's so much school based activity? The magic does take a lot of work and I used to start buying in September. When the kids got to about 16 though I realised i was forcing stockings etc on them and they would prefer a lie in. It takes some adjustment and is a bit sad at first. Keeping it lower key with small kids i guess would mean no house guests or driving around visiting everyone. But that may leave an elderly parent alone which i can't do.

No stress for me, I've buffered off to my Dad's for the weekend so DH can stress alone ( he always over does it, but he'll feel great when it's finished)

Yes I think Christmas with primary school age children is just busy/stressful.

So much that is unavoidable. No escape!

Well, I’m not a ‘taker’ or a passenger on other people’s Christmases, and we have an excited six year old, and an unwell family member in our home country whose last Christmas it might be, but I’m not ‘losing my shit’.

In fact, I’m not absolutely certain which country we’re spending Christmas in yet, as we usually travel to another country to see our families (with hidden Santa persons in the boot, and kitchen equipment), rent somewhere (no room in family houses) and host them all for Christmas dinner in our rental, to avoid hauling DS around relatives’ houses when he just wants to play with his new toys — but this year the rental suddenly fell through a couple of days ago.

But we’ll figure it out, either way. Our tree at home is up and decorated, we have outside lights, cards have been sent, DS’ presents bought — he’s all excited from nativity plays and a Santa’s grotto visit and a school Christmas fair. Family presents will be bought if and when we travel. I certainly haven’t been ‘going bananas’ or buying things since the summer, both of us work in demanding professional jobs, and our plans/lack of plans are averagely stressful to most people, but I still don’t get all the drama.

We've been doing the minimum for about 15 years, since we moved abroad.

Don't bother with decorations or a tree, cats would wreck anything in 5 minutes.

Cards only to the most important. Gifts only for each other and parents. Mostly bought online.

No work party and Christmas lunch in the pub.

A nice relaxing time off eating junk and watching TV is what we want.

What a refreshing thread - there is a Sanity Clause! As the true meaning of Christmas is all but obselete (which I think is sad), I'd be ok not doing anything at all but make a bit of an effort for 18 year old DD and ageing mum. No cards, minimal presents and a potted tree I've had for 4 years. Can't understand how people on low incomes get into such debt. It's time to stop the capitalist madness!

hmargaretj

If I had my time again I wouldn't do the Santa thing other than as a nice story. We didn't overdo it (just stockings and a knock on the door delivery on the day) but it was still a PITA. Then you have to go through the whole 'when to tell them' rigmarole although we made sure we dropped enough heavy hints that they all worked it out for themselves by about 7 but it's still energy you don't need to spend.

Do it if you want to, just weigh up the pros and cons for you.

I'm cutting down, I wanted to not give presents to friends at all but one already got me something so I'm in the process of buying small gifts (and crafts type things for their kids). I already did a post about that lol. No kids myself.

I'll say something about no gifts next year as I'm wanting to save (hello Brexit) and so on.

I have a few people I send cards to but just using up what I already have. I want to cut that out completely eventually. Haven't had a tree up for the last 5 years or so, can't be arsed. I enjoy being off work and having a nice meal with family, catching up with friends etc but that's it.

I read online recently that Christmas is like a deadline, rather than a holiday and that totally resonates for me.