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Original poster

Is £10 present per child stingy for nieces/ nephews?

61 replies

HeffalumpsDaughter · 12/12/2018 21:33

Previously I’ve spent more as only had one niece and one nephew. This year I have four. SIL always spends £25+ per child and although I could afford to do the same it would be a stretch. I have now got presents for dniece which cost £8.99 and dnephew that cost £9.99 and I’m dithering about getting something else to bulk it out a bit. I have the added problem that I have seen these kids once for about 2 hours since last Christmas (purely due to distance rather than not being super close). I’m pretty sure they’ll like what I’ve gor but I don’t want SIL to think I’m being mean.

Argh! I do this every year and never know if I’m buying the right value gift.

OP posts:
chloem93 · 12/12/2018 23:07

Buy what you can afford, it's not worth going into debt over. If it makes you feel any better, I didn't have anything from my uncle last Xmas or year before and I didn't give a toss. I also won't be getting anything for anyone this Xmas, apart from a card. I did suggest secret Santa but the suggestion has been ignored unfortunately, secret Santa would make things less stressful for everyone.

AugustRose · 12/12/2018 23:37

£10 is fine and that's about what I give, I sometimes add sweets/chocolate - my sister has 4 kids and 2 grandkids and I can't give any more. I have 4 DC and she spends a little more on them, but for years she didn't give birthday presents so it's her choice.

Xmasbaby11 · 12/12/2018 23:41

That sounds fine! I don't have any nieces or nephews but my brother spends well under a tenner on my dc. It's fine with me - he's skint and I'd hate him to spend more than he can afford.

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Ohdobakeoffdear · 12/12/2018 23:47

We have 17 nieces and nephews. Budget is £10-15 per child. It’s still a fortune.

Answering your question: no, it’s not stingy.

Fun anecdote, a couple of years ago I asked one of my nieces for for some ideas for her present. She said ugg boots or ghd’s. I haven’t asked since then Grin

pumpkinpie01 · 12/12/2018 23:54

I only have 1 niece and 2 nephews , I see them every week and have spent about £25 each on them I could spend more on my niece as she is so easy to buy for and we are very close but then that wouldn’t be fair on her brothers.

BackforGood · 12/12/2018 23:55

£10 is fine, but the sensible thing is to have the conversation, amongst the adult a long time before Christmas.
"Hey SiL, what do you think about setting a rough budget for the DNs next year? I was thinking about £10? I wan also wondering if you want to do 'wish lists' next year, as we aren't in and out of each others houses it is sometimes difficult to know what they already have / don't have, what they would like etc. ? Give it some thought and we'll chat again in the Summer"

PoutySprout · 12/12/2018 23:57

It’s £10 more than we spend!

GreenTulips · 13/12/2018 00:06

I have 3 and sis has 3 she buys and wraps for hers from me and I buy and wrap mine from her

Cost is not discussed - sometimes she is more 'generous' and others less so!! Depends on what they want.

My other sister is always skinny - she sends token gifts - also fine - teache kids to be greatful for any thoughtful gift.

safariboot · 13/12/2018 01:22

Surely that's entirely dependent on how much disposable income you have.

ThriftyMcThrifty · 13/12/2018 03:32

I spend anything from 3 to 15 pounds, I just pick something they will like. But I tend to spend around 25 per set of nephews. I have 9, and one niece, and three more due in the new year, so I stick to my budget. The kids are still young so share books/toys anyway.

BigGreenOlives · 13/12/2018 03:40

We had an agreed budget of £10 a child when there were 9 under 18s split between my husband & his sisters. No presents for over 18s so only one child left & she’ll probably receive more expensive presents from her aunts.

HJWT · 13/12/2018 03:42

We spend the same amount on each, depending on siblings amount of children, so my sister has 3 kids they get £10-15 each and my sister in law only has 1 so her DD gets £30, my SIL always spends a lot on our 1 DD to though, my other sisters 3 kids get a £5 selection box each because she spends £8-10 on our DD, and my other sister has no children so we spend a bit more on her because she buys for us 3 and there's only 1 of her, hope that makes some sense 😂 but then again between DH & I we have 13 nieces & nephews....

KeysHairbandNotepad · 13/12/2018 04:28

Sounds fine to me op , as pps have said , never spend more than you can afford.

My son recieved a few £10 gifts for his birthday and they're lovely things. He's a baby but enjoys his stacking cups and wooden puzzles. My 12yo got some new fineliners and a good sketch pad which is also a great gift.

RebootYourEngine · 13/12/2018 04:48

I like the challenge of getting great presents for as little money as possible.

fieryginger · 13/12/2018 04:50

No. £10 is right imo.

Limpshade · 13/12/2018 04:57

I'd be more than happy with a £10 gift for the DC from my DSis or DSIL. I think now that me and my siblings all have kids, everyone is a bit "over" having or giving masses of stuff.

midnight1983 · 13/12/2018 04:59

Why would the amount spent matter? Do you try an calculate how much people have spent on you when you recieve a gift?

Seriously, it's not worth stressing about. Genuinely, I believe it's the thought that counts. Get them something you think they will enjoy and all will be well. Enjoy Christmas Xmas Smile

midnight1983 · 13/12/2018 04:59

*and

Butteredghost · 13/12/2018 05:16

Not at all stingy. It sounds average - generous to me.

DinosApple · 13/12/2018 05:38

We don't have any neices or nephews, but £10 per child would be fine from a receiving point of view.

The children who I do buy for that I consider like family (god children/close friends DC), we all generally stick to buying books at well under a tenner.

Notevenmyrealname · 13/12/2018 05:48

No - from my personal point of view as a parent, I’d prefer less being spent on my children anyway. I don’t have nieces or nephews but personally would prefer my DSis, DSil and extended family in general to spend smaller amounts on my children as otherwise it puts more pressure on us to spend more money and really it should just be a token. An item of clothing, a small gift, whatever.

ChishandFips33 · 13/12/2018 05:51

£10isb here too on the principle they get waaaay too much from parents/g.parents

If they got way less and I thought they'd really use it then I'd spend much more

Phillipa12 · 13/12/2018 06:01

Im from a large family, i have 7 nieces and nephews and spend £10-£15 on each, this year its been mainly towards the £10 mark, the kids have all got what they wanted. My sister has 16 children to buy for, its just unaffordable. All the older ones know the budget so look for a suitably priced toy or like my dc1, ask for cash to put towards something bigger hes spotted.

Nsbgsyebebdnd · 13/12/2018 06:06

Agree with pp that should just suggest a £10 budget with your dsil. £10 is absolutely fine and you can get some nice things. I spend £20 on my nieces but there are only two and I think that makes a difference too.

caffelatte100 · 13/12/2018 06:24

My brother and I are just buying everyone in the other family a book each - so generally we will be spending much less than 10 pounds but we will look for something really personal to their interests etc. We can all afford a lot, (a lot more - money is no issue really), but we feel this is a nice idea and keeps it easier as we won't see each other this Christmas as well as personal. We also don't like Christmas being all about the presents, more the thought.
I think 10 pounds is enough, but you might like to clear it with your SIL.

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