How bad is this?

[Richellerich]

Okay so, I don't know how to even word this without sounding insane but I can't bring myself to answer the door. Every time someone knocks I have a mini anxiety attack to the point where I feel like I can't breathe and I shake uncontrollably. I don't know what I'm afraid of or what I think will be on the other side of the door but its becoming a real issue. I have a one year old son and it sometime takes me hours to pull myself together enough to go outside and empty the nappy bin. The more I think about it the worse it seems and I have no idea what to do about it. I don't want people to think I'm crazy or an unfit mother but I don't think I can go on like this. I don't know what I'm asking really, just any advice you may have or what to do in this situation?

You need to see your GP.

Do you and your son go out at other times?

Go and have a chat with your GP. Also look to see if any breathing exercises will help.

I felt very much like you're describing when my eldest was 10 months old.
In my case it was the beginnings of and part of PND.
I think you would really benefit from seeing your GP, there is so much support available. With the right help you can get through this and start to enjoy life again.
Don't be afraid that people will judge you as a Mum. PND really is a very common and treatable condition.
I hope you start to find things easier soon

@Jackshouse Not much, I'm okay to go out with others but going out alone is a huge task, I look calm on the outside but my mind is going crazy and I can't enjoy myself. I don't know how to approach it with the GP and don't want to be labelled as a bad parent

Thank you @mrstommybanks, that helps to know I'm not the only one. Any advice on how to approach it with the GP?x

Just take a screen shot of your post or write it out and give it to your GP at the start of your appointment.

I think it helps if you write some notes about how you're feeling, and what triggers those feelings.
If you get a bit emotional when you see your GP and overwhelmed or scared you can just give them the notes and that will help open up a discussion. Try not to be worried, they honestly see this very frequently.
If it helps you can take your partner or a friend with you.
Honestly don't suffer in silence, be brave and get an appointment asap. The sooner you take that first step the sooner you will feel like you again