I think I may be pregnant, can’t continue the pregnancy if so

[SemperIdem]

I’m currently taking roaccutane (catastrophic impact on a foetus) I have a coil in place.

The former makes almost all pregnancies unviable, the latter should make them impossible (99% of the time).

But I’m 4 days late, I am never this late. My partner and I are in a really happy, my daughter and he have a wonderful relationship.

I’ve felt broody for a little while but would never have wanted it now, because of the medication I’m on for my skin.

I’m a grown woman and I’m frightened to take a test because I know I will have to terminate. I’m strong pro-choice believer, any woman, any time, any reason.

But if I am pregnant, I will be devastated, because without the medication, it wouldn’t even be a question. But with it, there’s also no question, but it comes with a less positive answer.

What kind of coil do you have? If its merina it can stop or reduce periods dramatically. I have one and don't remember my last period (at least a year ago). It is highly unlikely that you are pregnant.
If you are, you will have to terminate. The meds will have a terrible effect.
My advice, for what its worth, is to try to detach yourself. Think of this like a clinical situation. This pregnancy is not meant to be. If you want a baby, come off the meds and wait a few months. Then remove the coil and get on with it.

((Hug)). Your distress is palpable 😕

UAEMum is right on all counts. It’s highly unlikely you’re pregnant but if you are, you have to detach. ‘Cluster of cells’ or whatever. You can’t continue to be pregnant right now, it’s not a baby yet, don’t let your head go there. Cluster of cells. Test, because it’s highly unlikely you’re pregnant and FAR more likely the coil is stopping your periods.

Then when you’re sorted, make sure you and your partner are definitely on the same page about having children in the future.

💐

So, I spent some time on accutane, and while I never got pregnant on it I did look at the medical literature for prevalence of teratogenic effects. It is bad, but it isn't impossible that if you are indeed pregnant your foetus will be ok. This medical literature reports a prevalence of teratogenic effects of around 30% for example: www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/19961047. If you do find you're pregnant, it might be worth talking to a foetal medicine specialist before you make any decisions if a termination would be devastating for you (which to be clear it sounds like it would be).

I am absolutely 110% pro-choice, but I do think that choices should be informed.

Sorry this is so distressing. The fact on roaccutane are clear, it causes severe birth defects.

However I agree that it's very unlikely you are pregnant if you have a coil in. Is it hormonal or copper? Can you feel the strings, is it still in place? Cycles do change and 4 days isn't late enough to be definitively pregnant. I had the flu a few years ago and it made my period a week late.

I have a copper coil, the strings are still in place. They’re so reliable, I’ve had one before. I’m hoping that my cycle has been knocked off kilter by work stress or similar.

My body has’t done any of the usual “about to come on” things it would usually do, which is making me anxious. I know I’m probably only getting worked up about it because in this instance, pregnancy is the worst case scenario, it’s not a “it will be good, unplanned for but loved” scenario.

Need to pull myself together and just do a test.

Do the test. No point making any decisions until you know what's going on

Yes do the test then you'll know what you're dealing with. Hopefully just a false alarm but better to know than fret not knowing.

It’s very unlikely you’re pregnant. Periods are funny things.

Take a test to reassure yourself. It’ll be a nerve wracking few minutes but the relief will be worth it.

Also keep in mind the increased risk of an ectopic with a coil and get any odd symptoms checked out.

Really hope this works out well for you. Such a difficult position to be in