How to get better at shaking things off?

[BedraggledBlitz]

Sounds like I'm after hand job tips. I'm not.

I keep dwelling on stupid petty irrational SHIT. It is driving me mad and fuelling anxiety...

E.g.

1.Friends went out without me = they don't like me.

1. I forgot to offer taxi share to a new friend = she wont like me.
2. Didn't get thanked for something at work = everyone thinks I'm shit.

I know its nonsense and adds nothing to my life but I feel this negativity in the pit of my stomach.

What can I do? Is there a recommended book or should I take medication??

Context is I'm stuck at home a lot due to DC and no childcare. So my world is small and lonely.

I had cbt counselling and we worked on ways of me rein8ng my thoughts in when they began to run away with me. So l grew to recognise when this was happening and would talk to myself saying...hey where are you going with this and deliberately stop my self in my tracks.
Also l learned first to love myself and treat myself like a dear friend. So instead of beating myself up over the taxi l would talk to myself as l would to a friend. Offering love and compassion to myself instead of whipping myself. It takes time the change the record going on in our heads.

I don't know, I used be a lot more resilient. But now things just seem to pile up. I'm in the process of starting CBT soon. Hoping it helps me

Bless you OP. My thoughts are exactly like yours. It's exhausting. I have done CBT and it did help somewhat. I also recommend a book called The Chimp Paradox. It helps to recognise one of these intrusive thoughts, label it as anxiety, put it to one side and try and get on with your day. CBT will help you to work out how much of what you perceive is actually true (probably not true in most cases) and to stop 'Mind reading' other people. I didn't know until last year that these thoughts are anxiety, because I've always had them, and assumed everyone else did too. Good luck with it all.

I went on a Mindfulness course and it really helped with thoughts like this. It helps you recognise when you are feeling like this, and that if the same thing happened when you were feeling cheerful, then you wouldn’t give it a second thought, or would be ‘positively’ logical about it.
I should be listening to the Headspace app but keep forgetting but it is helpful in clearing the mind of repetitive thoughts. Yoga helps too.

OP are you me??
I find it gets worse at various times of the month so I keep a note of my cycle and can refer to it if I’m feeling especially shit and identify any hormonal triggers, as one way to help avoid the repetitive negative thoughts.
I had cbt a few years ago so I think I’ll go back to the worksheets and guidance I was given then to try to de-escalate. I always have good intentions but then life gets busy and it goes back to the vicious cycle.
Hope things get better soon for you

Just think about the death bed scenario. When you feel upset about something just ask yourself - Will it matter on your death bed that a stranger didn't thank you today? If the answer is no don't worry about it too much.

I go to Zumba once a week. After that its like water off a duck's back.

I think its definitely a case of having too much time on my hands, spent alone stewing on thoughts.

I'll look into CBT. I think I started the chimp paradox a while ago will take another look.

At least i can recognise that these thoughts are ludicrous bullshit that no-one else is thinking, just need to stop thinking them and I'll be much happier

A little tip that I find helps with not just thoughts, but also when things go wrong is “will I think about this in a years time?” 99% of the time the answer is no. So then it’s easier to let go of it in the moment and think oh well it will pass.

I'd popped this on my watch list @BedraggledBlitz as I was too knackered to reply at the time.
I have to agree with PP's CBT really helps and I got access to it very quickly without the need for a GP referral, via IAPT.i just booked it myself in line.
Mine is linked to a long term illness and the course is designed to take that into consideration but the principals are the same.
I'd thoroughly recommend it and it has helped me enormously.

Great thanks Gin I was wondering how to access CBT

I'm feeling more positive and aware when I am giving headspace to negative thinking, so that's a start!