Would you/have you let someone else take the blame for something you did despite terrible consequences for them?

[HarrySnotter]

I had a conversation yesterday with a colleague which is playing on my mind.

She tells me that she made an almighty cock up in a job many years ago that she let someone else take the blame for. The person was fired. Colleague thinks it was 'just one of those things' as it's 'dog eat dog in this world'.

I'm now viewing this person in a completely different way now, I've always considered her to be pretty straight up and would certainly have said I trusted her (up til now anyway). I can't imagine ever doing that someone - they were actually fired. What about their family? Their bills etc?

Surely this is not something that most people would do?

Yanbu
She’s a dick

What an awful person, I would really distance myself from her now I would struggle to even be polite to someone so self centred and uncaring.

No, I always work on the principle that the best way to deal with any crisis is to own up and apologise early.

I couldn't be friends with such a terrible person. I'm not sure what's worse, what she did or the fact that she isn't eaten up with guilt by it.

she might think she's clever for surviving in this dog eat dog world but she's just let you know that you should never trust her!

When people show you who they are, believe them the first time.

What a horrible person.

We're not friends, we're colleagues who are (were) friendly. I just can't see her the same way now. I keep thinking of how this one act of hers will have shaped the future of someone else, possibly in a very negative way. The fact that she's so casual about it is even worse.

Why would she even tell you this, can she not see it makes her look really bad?

No because I'd never forgive myself. Supposing the person ran a mock and lost their mind over it. You hear of these things happening.
Yes it might be a dog eat dog world, but Good luck telling that to Karma when she comes for her and she will do sooner or later.
Oh and BTW be very very very careful and wary of her. Shes dangerous.
If she's got someone else sacked due her incompetence she'll do it again if she has to

Its not like she's remorseful, is it

How serious was the ‘cock up’, and why on earth is she telling a colleague a piece of information which could have very serious consequences if you decided to pass it on to her old employers, or, at the bery least, mean she’s mistrusted by all colleagues at her current job?

I would be absolutely disgusted if a colleague told me this. I would also have my guard permanently up around her.

Some of these hypothetical questions leave my unsure, I don't know what lengths I would go to until I'm in a situation, but this one I know that I wouldn't let someone else take the rap because I did make a mistake once and I owned up to it as soon as I realised.

Now that you know this about her, and if you are at all reliant on her as part of your work process, make sure that all work communication is documented, send an email to summarise and confirm any verbal conversation. I did have a project once where I was working with someone who put in minimum effort but always positioned himself to avoid any resulting shitstorm by making everything someone else's fault. At least I knew this going in and would send a follow up email to every phone call or conversation confirming that I needed X from him by Y date in order for me to do my stuff with the data. I always made a point of saying that my schedule was tight so any delay on his part would likely put his project to the back of the queue behind other people who were meeting their deadlines.

I’d be keeping well away from this person OP. To do something like that in the first place is awful but I suppose if she’d seemed remorseful and it was a long time ago I could try put it out of my mind (not completely) but being blasé about fucking someone majorly over would make me view that person very negatively from now on

I would be concerned that she has told you this because she wants to have you compromised in some way

It sounds like she might be an actual psychopath - I've known one in my time and they simply can't see why you wouldn't throw someone to the wolves if it makes your life even slightly better.

Wow. No.

I can;t believe she actually told you that too! Most people would know that was a very bad ting and even if they HAD done it they would keep well quiet about it.

She has probably done the same to you.

I would be very suspicious. Why is she telling you this?

Not exactly but my cousin once smashed a window at school and blamed it on somebody else and I didn’t tell the truth. I was 8. Still feel guilty 22 years later.

Bloody hell there is no way I could do that, I'd be sleepless for life!

If I were you, OP, I'd tred carefully. She's done this once that you know of, she can do it again. Make sure any work related stuff you may do with her can be backed up in writing, etc for your own protection.

When I was a kid I did lots of naughty stuff and blamed it on my little sister (cut holes in the living room curtains etc.). She ended up with a reputation for being a naughty one, (though still the golden child). Hmm, lightbulb moment....

Anyhow, as an adult, no, that behaviour is totally reprehensible. Be very careful OP.

There’s an MN saying about someone telling you who they are... well, she’s done that loud and clear. As others have said, do not trust her. At. All. Reprehensible behaviour.

Fortunately our work paths don't really cross much and I don't 'rely' on her in any way, but I would be very worried if I worked in the same department. If she was remorseful, not so much, but she talked like it was just one of those things that everyone does.