Top tips for not making tit out of self in work do

[drinkaware]

Work do tonight. Been out of the office world for some time but been in new job about 3 months so not been out socially. I'm very nervous and past form has shown me to rely heavily on booze to get me through me nerves then I need to live with the crippling fear until Monday! I know I could just not drink but they know I like a glass of wine and I feel ridiculous even asking this but what do you do to avoid making an arse is yourself

On not in ffs

Personally, I never drink more than one glass of alcohol at a work function. It was advice my late Dad gave to me (he went to lots of them) and it's always served me well. I've seen people get drunk at work events and suffer consequences (one got sacked after vomiting in a plant pot in a very posh hotel and one lost his driving license for still being way over the limit the next morning).

Wear clothes you feel comfortable in and heels you can walk in or flats.

Space your drinks carefully. As soon as you feel buzzed switch back to water or soft drinks.

Have a list of starter questions to ask people about themselves - "so what's been keeping you busy lately", "what are your plans for Christmas", "how's work been treating you". Just get people talking about themselves. If conversation tails off you can just excuse yourself and say you need to chat to XYZ.

You can just stay 90 mins and go if you like.

Don't be afraid to take 5-10 mins and hide in the toilets if it helps you feel calm.

Oh I could have wrote this post! Mine tonight too! Following for advice

Sorry to say it really is going to have to be not drinking. Start with a glass of wine. Follow up with a spritzer if you must, but then switch to soft drinks.

countess those are great conversation tips, I've been quite quiet in the office so far finding my feet but there will be quite a few people there tonight who I've not met from another office and I don't want to cling to people I know. I hear what everyone is saying on the alcohol. I'm very much a bottle or nothing person and once I get going that's it, however I am going to attempt a will of steel. No glass of wine is worth the bloody mortification of walking in on a Monday after totally showing yourself up

Agree with slowing down the drinking. I have made a tit of myself at work functions (annual professional conference dinner rather than Christmas party, but all the same) and on both occasions it was just far too much booze. Luckily it was the kind of event where nearly everyone is sloshed so these things aren't generally remembered and are even seen as a badge of honour.

However, the third one I attended I happened to be seated for dinner next to my department head so it had to be best behaviour.

She is a very nice woman, with whom it is possible to have an enjoyable evening, but any tittishness would be noticed and remembered.

So I made sure I had 2 glasses of water for every glass of wine and probably had around one bottle of wine over a long drawn out dinner, which was fine for me and didn't detract from the enjoyment of the evening (I know it is not the done thing on Mumsnet to enjoy rather than endure or simply not attend a work function, but I actually like some of my colleagues and wider business contacts, it's a very niche industry and everyone knows everyone so the annual conferences are usually a fun get together).

If I'm at a social occasion that I'm nervous about all of them, I stick to red wine, because I know I drink it very slowly. That way, I'll have a drink in my hand but just have the odd sip here and there.

Also, have an emergency bottle of water in your bag that you can drink on a loo trip, if you feel like you have overdone it.

Or don't drink - make up an excuse, like you're on antibiotics or something.

If you have to drink, don't have wine. It's easily topped up without you noticing, and the bottles are often on the table, making refills too easy.
Single shorts, with ice and a lot of mixer might work better for you.

Lots of good advice already OP I would add that it's useful to have your exit strategy before you get there. So book your cab/lift home before you go out. You may even find others feel the same as you and will be grateful you've set the precedent for an early-ish night!

Have a lovely time

Go with the ratio 3:1 3 soft drinks to I alcohol. You will be sat at a table for a fair time ,so just have your glass of wine plus your preferred soft drink but make sure you are drinking mainly that. Also smile and chat to those around you listening more about them than speaking about yourself.

Oh and I always find if I drink stood up holding my drink it goes down waaaay too quickly. So make like an Old Dear and try to get sat down!

Don't drink? It's not compulsory and if it makes you behave like a tit, better not do. You should treat a work party like work imo. Would you drink to excess at work?

Is there a meal? If it's just drinks then I'd turn up a little late or, if everyone is going straight to the place, invent an errand you need to squeeze in first. It's that early bit when everyone feels a little more wooden when the rounds come in thick and fast.

If its just going to be a nibbles thing rather than dinner and you want to drink, grab a sandwich between work and going to fill your stomach and help absorb the alcohol.

Also, if it's a meal, have a glass of wine, but keep your water glass well topped up. People won't notice if you're drinking more water than wine!