Constant feeling of anxiety/swooping stomach and crying multiple times daily for about 6 months - depression or just normal reaction to shitty circumstances?

[GingerbreadTeapot]

Spent the last year dealing with the assessment and diagnosis process of ASD in my youngest child, plus a very difficult change of school and 6 months and counting on a reduced timetable while we fight the case for an EHCP.

My relationship has just fallen apart and I'm newly single.

I cannot stop crying but this was going on before the relationship breakup. It's worse right now but that's to be expected IMO. I think I've cried every day this year, at the moment I'm crying multiple times every day but again who doesn't after their partner of 11 years finishes with them?

I can't remember the last time I didn't have that swooping nervous feeling in my stomach. Rarely sleep a whole night and the latest I've slept for at least 6 months is about 5.30am. Wake up with heart pounding in the night regularly and take ages to get back to sleep. Don't want to see anyone, hate being around other people, just feel like a failure and can't find anything to say to anyone.

But I feel like all this is a perfectly normal reaction to incredibly difficult circumstances and that it's not indicative of any underlying issue. XP thinks I am depressed and should see a doctor but I don't get what a doctor can do? My life is shit. That's the bottom line, and until things get easier I don't know how my feelings can change.

I'm not an expert, but I think you are depressed. Crying and that feeling in your stomach are normal parts of grieving for your relationship, but the feelings of wanting to distance yourself, feeling a failure, not sleeping well, etc, all sound like symptoms of depression.

I would chat to your GP, tell them what you've told us. A low dose antidepressant could help, as will talking therapy if you can get referred. Things you could also try in the meantime are, talk to your friends, make sure you eat well and try to get out for short periods most days.

Good luck. I really hope you start to feel better soon.

Thank you :)

I just feel very lost and hopeless but at the same time that isn't an unreasonable way to feel given how shit everything is!

You can have reactive depression. Even if it’s just a reaction to everything (that’s so much to go through) it doesn’t mean a chat to your GP wouldn’t be helpful

Can I ask what age you are OP?
You are certainly having a hard time but menopause/ perimenopause can also give some of the symptoms you've described such as sleeplessness, palpitations etc

I'm 35. And tbh the anxiety feeling has been present for most of my adult life, it's more that there have been times when it's gone away for a while.

If you can get a gp referral for (or afford private) counseling, that would be beneficial whether you're clinically depressed or 'just' going through a rough time.

Fwiw I went through a similarly shit time and wondered whether I was depressed, so I get where you're coming from. Counseling really helped, as taking therapies often do.
Speak to your GP.