Children with SEN in a mainstream nursery - any experiences?

[SinkGirl]

Next week I’m going to look at some nurseries for my twins to start in January for just a couple of mornings a week - it’s all very last minute as one was awarded DLA very recently so will get funding and this means we can afford to send them both for the minimum two sessions a week. I’m not doing it for childcare as I already work part time around DH’s job, it’s purely for their development as I think it will benefit them.

I’m feeling really anxious about it - I love my boys to pieces but boy are they a handful! They are lovely happy boys, rarely cry or have tantrums, but they both have white dangerous behaviours that make me worry.

Twin 1 is very delayed in some areas (social skills and communication, no words yet) but doing really well in others - he can match a whole deck of picture cards without any trouble, can build really well and is essentially a professional level mountain climber. This kid can climb like you wouldn’t believe - this also means he falls a lot and ends up covered in bruises and that’s with me trying not to take my eyes off him for a second. I don’t know how we’ve avoided A&E to be honest, just luck so far! We are waiting to see SALT and the HV is also referring him to the child development team due to his delays, but overall I think he could do quite well in nursery.

I’m much more concerned about twin 2, who is the happiest boy you’ve ever met but is delayed across the board. He can’t talk at all yet either. His social skills are better, but he’s delayed in every area and his understanding isn’t there either. He has constant sensory seeking behaviour, mainly running, spinning and mouthing/ chewing / risk of choking if I don’t police every item in the vicinity. He has been diagnosed with a vision disorder but we don’t know whether he can see well or not - he copes very well if he doesn’t but you can see signs of issues.

I think I’m scared of something bad happening, but also scared that nowhere will take them because of all this. I’m looking mainly at small settings with excellent inspection results and SENCOs but I’m still really anxious about it.

Can anyone tell me their experiences? Did it work out? There aren’t any special nurseries locally so it’s mainstream or nothing - I guess all we can do is try. Would love to hear how others have gotten on though.

DD really didn't cope at all at a big franchise nursery - they were OFSTED outstanding but just too big and noisy, and the staff weren't understanding about sensory differences. She is in another mainstream nursery but a far smaller one, which is quieter and where the staff are absolutely AMAZING. They've built her a sensory area to go to when it gets too much and have put an IEP in place, and she is thriving. This one is OFSTED 'good' but you can tell that the staff especially the manager really love the children.

It really depends on the nurseries - through my work have found some not great some fantastic some caring but not very switched on about needs....
I guess they are 2ish? - in most areas nursuries can apply for extra funding/support - called Inclusion funding if they think a child needs extra support (not related to any diagnosis/DLA ) they can contact the council..
I would be honest with the nurseries you see, that the boys have needs and see how they react - check out their published SEN information (shoudl be on your council Local Offer) this can tell you their experience .....
Often Speciliaist nurseries dont start until the school nursery year so 3ish - it would be unusual for there not to be one -check the council website maybe t2 could move there at 3 -t1 may not be eliginle depending on how his needs pan out...
mostly once they get in the kids and families really benefit and I would recommend for even just a few sessions if you find a nursery that listens...lots are good -but dont o by websites you have to see for yourself...
have you thought about them going to diffrent sessions? can work for some as they get 1:1 time and also for the nursery but thats really about how you feel...

I can't see if you've said how old they are - are they two yet? If so the one who gets DLA will be entitled to extra funding, not just the 15 hrs funding but also 'access' funding (called different things by different councils).

I would definitely visit several nurseries, talk to them frankly about your concerns. If they are 2+ years then definitely consider a 'preschool' which is different from a day nursery because it doesn't take under 2s. Usually they have separate rooms for 2 year olds and often they have experience with SEN.

My child is nearly three, not walking, not verbal, delayed across the board. She started preschool a month after turning two, two mornings a week and now does 3. She has a one-2-one and adores nursery. The other children adore her and nursery day that she is a benefit to the room, they have always included her in absolutely everything.

Have you considered requesting an EHCP?

www.ipsea.org.uk/ehc-needs-assessments

You haven't mentiond their age?
Unless I've missed it?

My ds has asd (moderate) along with development delays.

He's 5 in a few weeks but developmentally like a 2yr old he has severe speech delay, can't have a conversation with you or answer questions or anything and is still in nappies etc. Yet in some areas he's really clever like he can remember routes to places we have only been the once, his memory is unreal, he can play games on the iPad intended for adults - for instance a restaurant game, he cooks all the food serves the customers we have never even shown him, he worked this out for himself and he's now on level 37

He's always been in a mainstream. Nursery and now School. He had 1-1 support in nursery & also has it now he's started school, he also recently got an ehcp etc.

He couldn't go to Sen nursery as he didn't have his ehcp back then so went mainstream from the start.

He probably won't always be in a mainstream environment & will move to a special school at some point in the future (now he has ehcp this is possible if we decide) but I think for now it's not doing him any harm and he is learning (just slowly) but he enjoys his school.

Nursery did him good as he got to see other children for 16 hours a week, learnt to separate from me, enjoyed going to play and it selfishly gave me a break, usually just to get cleaned up - but that's something I can't do while he's home (he needs supervision at all times which by the sounds of it you know all too well what I mean!)

Good luck whatever you decide.

My DS is nearly 3 and has ASD (very recent diagnosis). He is in mainstream preschool with 1:1 support. We are very lucky in that we the school is outstanding and the SEN provision is brilliant. The SENCO is my hero.

Thanks so much everyone! Yes, their age would be helpful! They’re 2 (26 months, his 15 free hours kick in in January).

I’m looking at three places so far this coming week - a nursery, a preschool and what’s called a playschool but I think is basically a nursery.

T2 has a portage worker so she’s said she can get involved too. T1 just being referred for a portage assessment so if he qualifies (which is likely I think based on his 27 month check scores) it will likely be at least six months before someone is assigned to him and they only work term time so it may not be until September.

I think T1 will cope fine - he’s lacking in social skills and I think it would be really really good for him. Much more concerned about T2 mainly from a safety point of view, in terms of him putting small things in his mouth, but also just have visions of him running up and down and not engaging with anything.

Will see what they say and will ask the portage worker about special preschools. Can’t find any info on the local special schools sites about them starting before 5.

It’s good to know it’s possible in the right place though - hopefully one of the places we see will be good, I’ve heard good things about all 3 so hopefully one will be a good fit.

My dc is severely disabled, very little/poor speech. My dc attended a mainstream nursery attached to a school then transferred to special school for reception year (the gap had widened considerably by that point).

I went on to work at a different special school which itself had its own nursery unit, you may find something like that in your area?

Children are very resilient and accepting. I’m sure your dcs will get along fine and the other children will be accepting of them and indeed helpful towards them.

I hope you find what you’re looking for.

There are lots of Nurseries that will not only 'cope' with your boys but will support them really, really well. There are also Nurseries that are nowhere near so good. There are Nurseries that may be good Nurseries but the particular environment (for any one of a number of reasons) might not suit them.
Don't worry too much about what they call themselves - Nurseries use different names for the same type of provision.
Go and talk to the staff, and be honest about your concerns. When placements don't work out, it is often because of lack of communication (on either, or both sides)

This might vary from one authority to the next, but in our LA there aren't any 'specialist nurseries' other than the EYs classes in some of the special schools - you would need an EHCP complete to apply for a place there in our authority).

I pulled my 3 year old with autism out of a school nursery after a term because they were were really horrible to him, and unsurprisingly he hated it. He got absolutely nothing out of his time there, and it some ways regressed (his behaviour went down hill and he started biting himself).
But don't let my bad experience put you off, just pick your nursery very carefully.

I’m so sorry shouting - that’s awful. I will absolutely just pull them out if it doesn’t work out. Hoping it will be positive for them but if not then they don’t need to go. Hoping I can choose correctly for them and don’t mess it up.

Oh they are two, brilliant. The ratio for two year olds is one adult to four children so for your child without additional funding this should still be fine initially, if he does need more support the nursery can apply for funding for that.

For your child with DLA the nursery can apply for special funding if he is doing less than 9 hrs a week which is quick to apply for and received quickly. In my borough this is called 'exceptional access' funding and for my DD it took two weeks from nursery filling in the form to them receiving the money so they were able to get a one to one in place for her really easily.

I agree with a PP, talk to the nursery's you visit really clearly about your concerns, it can be tempting to minimise but a good nursery will be keen to support your boys.

In our area children lose portage once they start any sort of pre-school as it is seen as the inclusion funding replacing it... in other areas they dont so talk to your portage person..
.they will know about long term for t2 -
re t1 if he's been assessed for portage then he will proabbly qualify for additional inclusion funding as well...

hope you find one you like..

For your child with DLA the nursery can apply for special funding if he is doing less than 9 hrs a week which is quick to apply for and received quickly. In my borough this is called 'exceptional access' funding and for my DD it took two weeks from nursery filling in the form to them receiving the money so they were able to get a one to one in place for her really easily.
That is specific to your authority Soapy, not a national entitlement. Wouldn't get that here.

In our area children lose portage once they start any sort of pre-school Yes, same here. Can't keep your home visitor once you have a Nursery place, but as you already have portage, ask them - they will know the specifics for your area, and will also know which the better / more suitable Nurseries are for your dc.

My son ( non verbal, sensory seeking, very limited understanding) went at 3 and struggled until 1:1 was put in place. He never got the full 15 hours because they didn't get enough funding. Once the support was in place he did seem to enjoy it. It was mainstream but they had a larger than average number of children with sen.

Definately get portage involved in looking at suitable nurseries. Is there an early years Sen service in your council? I would get them involved as well. It could be that your sons would benefit from a specialist nursery place if you can get one. As they get a bit older you will be looking at schools and I would assume that if they are at mainstream they will require 1-2-1 support and this will require funding and an EHCP. Or you may want to look at special schools and again this will require an EHCP. a nursery place now will be part of the evidence gathering process for this so get the professionals involved as they will be able to discuss funding with the nurseries.