Would you leave an unwell 11 year old alone?

[twosoups1972]

11 year old dd is off school ill today. She was hot and cold yesterday and had a sore throat. She's not terrible today but not well enough for school.

She's on the sofa and I am around. But later on we have Parents' Evening at 15 year old dd's school. She's in Year 10 so pretty important and both me and dh both want to be there.

Would you leave 11 year old home alone for a few hours? Also, dh and I were due to be going out tonight (have tickets for an event) that we were going to go on to later. 15 year old dd will come home after Parents' Evening to stay with her younger sister.

WWYD?

I would have one parent stay home during the parents evening and then your eldest stay with your youngest during the evening, with you touching base regularly

I would leave one parent at home too. It's unfortunate but I wouldn't feel happy leaving an unwell 11yo at home alone.

Yes I would feel uncomfortable leaving her too. I know my neighbour is around to babysit but not until 6.30pm. Or I could book a sitter at short notice but dd is very shy and not keen on sitters she doesn't know.

If you were going to miss parents evening altogether, I'd say leave them at home but if it's just because you both want to go, then I think no. One parent needs to stay at home.

As for your evening out, I think it's fine as older child will be there.

Has she ever been left before and could she contact you to come home in an emergency?

At 11 I was regularly home alone so don't see an issue with it in itself - it's just a cold, if she was vomiting or dizzy it would be different, but surely all she'll do is lie on the sofa and watch crap telly for a few hours?

I would leave her if she was happy to be left and if one of you agreed to come home right away if she got worse or anything similar.

Yes she’s been left alone for short periods.

Should also add that older dd really want us both there, 11 year old is ASD which is having a difficult effect. Older dd thinks the world revolves around her younger sister.

I think in that case one of you needs to stay at home.

I don't think it's a big deal if one parent rather than two goes to parents evening.

Please, both go to parents evening. Would you leave DC2 alone if she did not have a sore throat/cold? Does she know how to phone you for reassurance?
DC1 wants you both there and always gets sidelined for DC2. Please don't confirm her 'second best' worries.
DC2 is not seriously ill, she has a cold!
This is how DCs gain confidence and independence. It is another short period that you will be leaving her for, presumably she coped last time? She is 11 and she is not seriously unwell.

I would be fine leaving a non-vomiting 11 year old at home. I would think twice if they were throwing up but not worry about a cold type illness.

You don't both need to go to parents evening.

I'd leave her alone for a few hours. It sounds like she just has a cold. She'll be perfectly fine.

I think you need to prioritise your older DD here. Your younger one will be absolutely fine for a few hours and one if you can always go home if there's an emergency.

Thanks all. In the end I went to Parents' evening and dh came home to stay with dd3. It actually worked out quite well - older dd wasn't that bothered in the end about dh not coming but she really wanted me there.

Didn't go out in the evening in the end because of something else that came up.

I would disagree about both parents going to PE though - I think where possible it's really important for both parents to go.