Anyone feeling sad over family issues now in run up to Christmas?

[bluechairsandsofa]

I enjoy Christmas, and am fortunate to spend it with lovely DP, but it's tinged with sadness to do with my parents/ family of origin.

My mum will probably send a text on Christmas Day. I live in a different country to her and I don't think it would occur to her to have invited me this year. She didn't speak to me at Christmas last year and we have had minimal contact this year. My father pretends I don't exist, but then he didn't meet me until I was a teenager so has no fondness for me.

The most painful thing though is remembering someone who has died who loved me very much and always made family Christmases wonderful and cosy.

Anyway, it's just that time of year for feeling that way I suppose - lots of depictions of happy families enjoying festivities together. Is anyone in a similar boat?

Op I'm in the same boat have been nc with all my family now for 7 months christmas used to be such a magical time for us all. Dps family aren't into it as much so I think I'm going to struggle this year. Also meosmy eldest daughter doesn't live with me so will probably only see her for a few hours Xmas day. That makes me sad. But I need to make my own traditions now for my other 2 children that are at home. Starting to hear Xmas songs in the shops has made me realise how hard it will be. I've been fine up til now...

I feel like this at Christmas.

My family are all estranged from one another but there was a time that Christmas was the most magical time of year. We never had much but it made it more special in a way.

Nowadays I have accepted I’ll never have a the family Christmas from years ago, but I do have the opportunity to make my own traditions, as well as take some of the great bits from the memories for my DD.

You say you enjoy it and have your DP, so why not make it special for the two of you.
I stay away from family films now, although I do like a bit of love actually.

My best comfort is to look back on the happy times fondly, and let yourself feel sad for a moment. Get it out, and then find something that makes you feel wonderful.

Hugs OP. I hope that made some sort of sense.
You aren’t alone in your feelings 💗

It’s the first Xmas since my Mum died and all the sadness is rising again. No need to buy a present for her compared to last year when I got to cook Xmas dinner for her my home for the first & only time. I’m already finding it really hard to be happy & jolly this year as I’d rather not be forced to celebrate.

@username so sorry for your loss

I think lots of people feel this way. I am a lone parent with one DC and Christmas is one of the times when I sometimes feel rather sad that i don’t have the large jolly family I thought I would have.

Op your not alone. Its super painful for I'd say more people than it is who are pain free.

It helps I think to take control and think.. I'm not going to let my Xmas be dictated by bad memories and bad people...

Your free to start making your own wondeful memories. You can do whatever you like and go wherever you want, escape the UK if yiu can, most people are of course tied by financial constraints... But even then try and do really out of character stuff and make new memories.

So many people dread it. I had a really awful time at Xmas a few years ago and I followed my own advice to make it special... The only cloud I have now is miserable in laws...

My first Christmas without my dad. My second Christmas without my mum. And for the first time my adult daughter is working on Christmas morning so it is just boring dh and me for breakfast and my sister is joining us for lunch and 3rd will be home in the afternoon to open presents.

This will be my first Christmas without DH....

Was out for dinner last night and busy today, so just reading through these now. My heart goes out to anyone feeling like me. This feeling is still getting to me today.

So sorry for everyone's loss and heartbreaks. I wish there were ways to make it easier.