Shit, shit, shit forgot my niece's birthday. What do I do now?

[WhoTFIsAlanBrazil]

It was DN's birthday a few days ago, she turned 12. I completely forgot to call her and wish her a happy birthday.

I did sent money to DSis for a gift (they live abroad) but on the day I was taking part in a sporting event and completely forgot about DN. I have just realised what I have done when checking my bank account and seeing the bank transfer.

Unfortunately I have form for that. Despite putting reminders in my home and work calendars and on my phone, I regularly forget birthdays and anniversaries (including my own!)

I want to apologise to DN and DSis but I am worried they won't think I am sincere as it has happened before

I feel like such a dick, and I don't know what to do or how to make it up to DN.

Any ideas please?

Are you not overthinking it a tad?

My family does this all the time! None of us worries about it because life is busy! Surely you just ring and ask her how her birthday was and explain that you lost track of the dates...

"You did get my Happy Birthday text on Monday, didn't you?! I just realised today that I didn't hear back from you, I was afraid it hadn't delivered."

If you sent money to buy a gift from you you didn't completely forget and she probably won't think you forgot

I think your overthinking it! just call at a convenient time over the next few days. If they live abroad they will no doubt have a time difference of some sort as wel, so just call on the weekend, say you thought it would be the best time to catch them free

You’re doing better than my SIL, DD1 has her birthday in June and didn’t receive anything! SIL is usually late and we have just accepted that but am pretty pissed off she forgot.

I don't know whether I am overthinking it, maybe I am?

I just don't want DN to think I don't care

It's just an hour's time difference, so I can't hide behind that.

I guess I feel worse because DSis never forgets anything like that. Our parents are very distant and don't necessarily send wishes for birthdays etc. and I am trying not to be like them, but it looks like I am.

I will call and apologise tonight.

I did that last week as I was ill.

I sent the card, an extra tenner and we spoke when it arrived when she called to say thanks.

All good.

Did you send the money in time for her birthday?

@hellojim I think the transfer would have come through in time but I'm not sure

I'd just let it go. You making a fuss about forgetting just reminds them that you did (forget). You sent a gift so no big deal.

I completely agree with llangennith. I would just phone her up for a catch-up and casually say that you hoped that she received the money in time for her birthday. As they don't appear to have rushed to thank you for your gift I wouldn't lose much sleep over it!

You sent her money as a present and that's enough IMO. You haven't done anything wrong.

However, if it's common in your family to call on birthdays, I would just ring and apologise and then just ask her if she had a good day etc. Don't overthink it. You made a tiny mistake.

Hmm I agree with hellojim actually. Don't apologise. They haven't rushed to thank you for your present. Just ring for a catch up/to hear about DN's birthday.