Can court take child away if I'm financially insecure?

[ElleRed]

I'm worried my ex may be have rights for our 3 year old son to live with him as I'm not named on the tenancy and if he throws me out, I won't have anywhere for us to live.

If I'm homeless, would he have rights to keep her?

I'm early 20s and completing my studies at universities intermittently, so no loan or grants, No benefits either as ex is high earner. I don't have a job as I haven't been successful in finding one and it's difficult finding part time work with a child.

Ex wanted us to move in 3 months ago, but previous to that DS lived with me whilst at university and ex would contact spordically.

Could the courts give him residence in this case?

It would kill me if my child was taken away from me just because I can't provide security. The thought makes me sick with fear.

To only see my child on weekends would completely destroy me. I still breastfeed him to sleep and when he's sick.

If you were to be made homeless you would be a priority for council housing, so I think that your worries are unfounded. You might need to be in a B & B while they found you somewhere but you wouldn't be homeless. Did your ex even live with you and your child other than the last few months you mention? It sounds like you're very much established as the primary carer.

They’re not going to take him away if you’re the primary carer especially if you’re still breastfeeding even minimally so please stop worrying about that.

You are in a vulnerable position financially though, hopefully someone will come along to help you out with that

If you were to be made homeless you would be a priority for council housing, so I think that your worries are unfounded. You might need to be in a B & B while they found you somewhere but you wouldn't be homeless. Did your ex even live with you and your child other than the last few months you mention?

Nope, we didn't live together. I stayed with a friend for 9 months, when i had time off from my degree. Then moved to university, 50 miles.

I'm in London, so worried I may not be housed at all.

It sounds like you're very much established as the primary carer.

Yes, he wanted nothing to do with us after the birth.

Why on earth aren't you claiming tax credits, child benefit, housing benefit, student loans etc?

Titchy I'm intermitting and attending for exams only. I failed too many modules last year.

The split is recent, and I'm trying to see how I can claim benefits.

Like I said upthread, ex is high earner/lots of savings/assets so I wasn't eligible for benefits when I moved in.

I've tried hard to gain employment, but have been unsuccessful due to not have the right experience.

Well if he's a high earner you'll have lots of child maintenance you can claim.

First things first. Talk to your university. They will have counsilling and also have a way to support you sorting out student loan and possibly accomodation as your circumstances have changed. University is the place to do this and are usually very good at helping. Next look at benefits you are entitled to as a single mother. Court will look favourably on you.

For a start, he is obliged to pay you maintenance so if he doesn't want to do it voluntarily you can go through the CMS.

Perhaps speaking to CAB would help.

I'm a bit confused - you said ex is a high earner so you couldn't claim anything but you also say that you didn't live together. I understand that if you don't live together your ex's income is not taken into account when claiming benefits?

When I moved in I wasn't eligible for it. Before that I was, then I had to submit a change of circumstances.

Ex wouldn't pay a lot in maintenance, when he did he paid the minimum.

I'm confused too. He wanted nothing to do with you after the birth, but you moved in? So now does he want the child and is he a good father?

It’s not up to ex to decide how much he pays! Go through CMS, they get his salary direct from HMRC and they decide what he pays. Phone them today.

Get yourself to a CAB office and get all your benefit applications done as soon as you can I.e today or tomorrow.

Get in touch with your local council to discuss what to do if you are thrown out.

Have you contacted cms? If he's a high earner you'll have a decent amount of maintenance. You need to get your ducks in a row as there are options available you to. Get online and get some benefit calculators and applications going, contact cms, get on the housing register if your homeless or find support to rent privately. Don't just be held ransom by this man. You have the opportunity to take control here and you need to step up and do it.

What makes you think he'd even want full custody?

He wanted to make things work about 6 months ago. I have him that chance, now things have gone down hill.

I would say he is as son certainly acts like he loves him

What makes you think he'd even want full custody?

He said he did. Told me that court wouldn't allow me to have son if I can't provide for him.

Lots of men say they want full custody but very few actually do once they realise what hard work it is caring for a young child and how it would affect their career/social life.

He doesn't have the first idea what a court would do. The court only cares about what is best for the child and that doesn't involve taking him off his mother/primary carer and giving residence to someone the child has a limited connection with.

A court would likely agree to overnight contact for the father at 3, even for a BF child - unless there were any safeguarding concerns of course.

Get your claim into CMS today. 20% of his net income (roughly) will be yours.