How can I help my Dd(15) ?

[HeadbandsandFlowers]

My Dd is 15, she is in year 11. She is beautiful, funny, kind, caring and clever but she just seems so unhappy.
She says she is fine but I get the feeling she is just painting on a happy face (as we all do sometimes).

She has always had a small group of friends and chooses to be at home with us rather than ‘hanging around the park drinking and smoking like the others’ (her words not mine) and I love that she wants to spend time with us, I am just worried that she is shutting herself away more and more as time goes on.
Her best friend is Muslim and her parents don’t really let her socialise very much outside of school and her other friends seem to have drifted away and only seem to talk to her at school.
She isn’t great at making plans or starting conversation with people due to low self confidence but is quite chatty once a conversation is started. I have tried over the years to boost her confidence, I was a shy quiet child until I was about 18 then I came out of my shell a little so maybe she will be the same?
I try my best to spend time with her doing things we both enjoy and we have a lovely relationship but it hurts to see her look so unhappy when she thinks nobody is looking.
Is there anything I could/should be doing to help or is this just normal teenage behaviour and I need to just let her find her way?

Have you mentioned anything to her?
Sometimes it helps to talk about your own teenage years, then she might feel she can relate to you.
You sound like a lovely mum. Take heart.

hard to say. being a quiet teen who blossoms later is possible and doesn't need to be fixed.

does she have a hobby? a sport? some area of interest where she can have achievements of her own. Things like a local art class (not necessarily with other teens, with a mix of ages) can be a way to be part of the outside world without the social pressure of having a conversation.

Firstly you sound like a lovely mum 💐. Secondly have you mentioned how you felt as a teenager to her- it may give her scope to open up in case anything is wrong. I know you’ve spoken already about it to her and it could just be she is a quiet person. If we were all the same it would be awful! Xx

Do you know her friend's dps? Maybe they would be happy for her to join your dd at your home for a film /pizza?

Thank you, I try so hard to be a good mum but sometimes worry that I need to back off, then I worry about backing off incase my instincts are right and she is struggling!

I felt so lonely as a teen, even though I was surrounded by lots of people. I was always out - getting up to all sorts, mainly drinking, because that was when I could forget about how shy and self conscious I felt. I have told her about this, not so much the drinking, and that when I went to college / uni/ work I found my real friends. I am glad she isn’t like that in a way because I put myself in so many dangerous situations but I fear she will look back when she is older and feel like she missed out.
She has admitted to feeling ‘a bit down’ but only when I have asked and mainly around the time of the month.
I haven’t met her friends parents but they have agreed that she can come over one Saturday night when they have finished their mock exams and have a movie night if her mum can meet me at the house first. Dd tends not to ask if she wants to do anything outside of school incase she upsets her because she isn’t allowed.

Being a mum to a teenager is hard work! Even though she is a well behaved teen.

Angus Castas is a supplement that can help with hormonal moods. Worth giving it a try. Just keep going op, she will be ok.

Thanks RickOShay, she doesn’t seem to be struggling too much with hormones it is just that she will sometimes admit to feeling down around that time.
Thanks

I’m wondering if I should send an email to her form teacher to see if they have noticed anything going on at school?