Counselling

[Wizzy99]

I’ve just started seeing a counsellor (4 sessions in) to work through some issues I have with my narc mother.

I cannot tell you how much better I feel already. I feel like the weight and gloom is (slowly) being lifted.

Not really sure why I’m posting but I guess if anyone out there is hesitating about seeing a counsellor, I would really urge you to pluck up the courage to go for it. I understand it’s not for everyone and that it can take a while to get a good fit but I can honestly say that I feel positive and hopeful about myself for the first time in what feels like forever.

Glad it's helping you. Mine is too - I'm on my 7th session. It's been really good to talk to someone neutral who has some useful ideas (other than 'cheer up').

Speaking to a professional person who is trained to listen, who doesn't minimise what you say, who doesn't judge, who doesn't give advice, who doesn't have their own agenda, can be a total revelation. I was in therapy for 7 years and it was by far the best thing I have ever done for myself (also the hardest). I'm so glad you're having a positive experience OP

Thank you I’m glad it’s helping you guys too.

In every session there is something my therapist says where it’s like a penny dropping, or lightbulb moment.

It’s fascinating! Plus the relief I feel is incredible. I don’t have to be “stuck” like this forever.

That's amazing! Ive been wondering whether I need to see one, I have considered it a few times over the years but was never sure if what I went through was that bad iyswim. Did you go through your GP? Do you have to give reasons why you think you need it?

I am glad its going well. I have been seeing someone for 10 weeks so far. It's going to be a long term thing.

Totally agree. A year in and I’m so much better. I can cope and I’m grounded.

I was seeing one yrs ago. I wasn’t depressed enough for the gp to be able to help. I was inches from a breakdown. She helped me through some really tough times by giving me the space to deal with a lot of shit.

She absolutely changed my life. I dread to think where I would be now without her.

That's great OP. I'm on my 8th year, and currently very full of weight and gloom, sadly! Which is not to say it hasn't been hugely helpful in many ways... Just having a pity party for one!

I too had considered it on and off over the years but never got round to it. I guess I wasn’t convinced my “problems” were bad enough. This year has been tough though, and I felt out of my depth in terms of how to manage certain situations. Plus I didn’t want these things to rule my life, and I am horrified at the thought of repeating history.

So enough was enough. I guess I’d hoped I could break free of the things squashing me down but wasn’t convinced it might be possible, and actually had no idea how to do it. Now there’s a tiny weeny light and I can feel I’ve got a fair way to go, but knowing that light is there is very reassuring.

I just emailed a few different people on the BACP website. I live abroad so needed someone by Skype. Not many were willing to do it this way, but thankfully my therapist was happy to.

Between sessions I keep thinking of other things I could ask them to help with. I know they can’t fix everything but it feels amazing to have them there as a professional resource to help me work through my head.

I’m expecting some hard things along the way but my god my kinks need ironing out.