My DH is from a large family and recently his mum died. We were close to her and it's been awful 
Of course in this situation, apart from everyone's grief, there is shifting relationships, new roles etc to deal with.
Whilst on the whole everyone has pulled together and there have been no call outs it's really brought into focus for me who I really click with and who treats me with respect etc. I'm tired of people pleasing and trying to be everyone's best friend when with some it's not reciprocated or even met with rudeness and unfeelingness from a couple of people.
Whilst I can be tactful and not be obvious or rock the boat I just want to focus on the relationships that bring me happiness and warmth. This death has made me think life is too short to waste too much time.
But is this possible? How do you navigate a large family with so many different personalities? Keep the peace whilst focusing on good relationships but not in a way that offends.